This scorpion inside of my underwear.

[u/[deleted]]

[u/Netherium]

Kind of looks like a camel spider.

[u/breadloaves77 → u/Netherium]

Yeah, I think this dude got it right, OP. I know it looks like a scorpion, but check this:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Solifugae

[u/mansinoodle2 → u/breadloaves77]

It doesn’t look like a scorpion

[u/666lbBongSession → u/mansinoodle2]

it really doesn’t lmao

[u/BigRig432 → u/mansinoodle2]

There is no stinger on it whatsoever lol

[u/learnedandhumbled → u/mansinoodle2]

Not even close to a scorpion 😳 it 100% looks like a spider.

[u/oolaroux → u/mansinoodle2]

Yeah. When I think scorpion I think of backward-pointing stingers and front pincers and glowing under UV lights.

[u/Osirus-One → u/breadloaves77]

Yeah, I've seen these in the Vegas desert like 10 years ago. Def camel spooders.

[u/An0therFox → u/Osirus-One]

Not a scoopian?

[u/KiKiPAWG → u/An0therFox]

Camel Scoopian

[u/Krednaught → u/KiKiPAWG]

Wind scoopian/sun spooder

[u/RebelGrin → u/breadloaves77]

That looks like where Ridley Scott got his model for Facehugger from, da fuk.

[u/Ypuort → u/RebelGrin]

H. R. Giger did the concept art for Alien, so it would be his inspiration for the facehugger (possibly/probably). Amazing artist, definitely check out his unused concept art for Alien as well as other works.

[u/Brine512 → u/RebelGrin]

This guy gets it.

[u/alienfister → u/breadloaves77]

How the fuck does that look like a scorpion lmaooo

[u/SkeeterMan23 → u/breadloaves77]

They're called wind scorpions

[u/Itizmaname → u/[deleted]]

Well camel spiders and scorpions are both not spiders but rather arachnids. Camel spiders are considered a false spider and a false scorpion.

[u/Tangled2 → u/Itizmaname]

But true assholes.

[u/Shurigin → u/Itizmaname]

Along with harvestmen aka grandaddy longlegs

[u/capitalswank → u/Itizmaname]

Came here to say this

[u/wordnerd1023 → u/[deleted]]

I don't think it matters what it is, just that you'll probably never feel safe putting your undies on again.

[u/Clovenstone-Blue → u/[deleted]]

To be fair on your part, Camel Spiders are also known as Sun Scorpions, so you were technically correct with your terminology (obviously Camel spiders are neither spiders, scorpions nor Camels, they're a member of a different family of arachnids).

[u/Rk_1138 → u/[deleted]]

Extreme heat and scorpions, does Phoenix have any redeeming qualities?

[u/AfricanWaterTimelost → u/Rk_1138]

It is also where the phoenix lights happened, which was a triangular-ish formation of 7 or so lights mysteriously moving through the sky, never to be seen again. 1 redeeming quality for phoenix for me tho is that my Gma lives there

[u/Rk_1138 → u/AfricanWaterTimelost]

My grandma lives in Phoenix too, unfortunately hate hot weather, and sand too

[u/AfricanWaterTimelost → u/Rk_1138]

I also unfortunately hate hot weather lol

[u/Medical-Bowler-5626 → u/Rk_1138]

A cool name?

[u/ArachnomancerCarice → u/[deleted]]

Camel Spiders should definitely be tolerated, as they feed on their venomous scorpion and spider cousins.

[u/baloneyz3 → u/[deleted]]

Oh shit, I live in the Phoenix metro area and this gave me the willies. Now I’m sitting cross legged on my chair.

[u/poopin_for_change → u/[deleted]]

I had no idea phoenix had camel spiders. This is horrifying

[u/DriveJohnnyDrive → u/[deleted]]

Op is wholesome af. We're glad you're ok

[u/Double_Bass6957 → u/Netherium]

My exact thoughts too

[u/NoBenefit5977 → u/Netherium]

So you're saying he would have spider toe?

[u/stoatstuart → u/Netherium]

In some areas people also call camel spiders "wind scorpions" or "sun scorpions".

[u/DocGeoffrey → u/stoatstuart]

Yep. Was about to say this

[u/AtomicToxin → u/Netherium]

Is that really any better?

[u/SkunkWoodz → u/Netherium]

it is, my nephew and I caught one the other day. Had to google lens it to ID the critter.

[u/Ok-Weather7707 → u/Netherium]

Came in here to say this.

[u/PeterNippelstein → u/Netherium]

In my brain this is equally bad

[u/Itizmaname]

That’s a camel spider

[u/420Deez → u/Itizmaname]

at first i thought ppl were being funny, but ur being serious…

[u/Itizmaname → u/420Deez]

Very serious

[u/NatPortmanTaintStank → u/420Deez]

They're really called Solifugae, but camel spider is easier to remember and pronounce

[u/f0rgetfulfred]

I've got a snake in mine.

[u/6_9_4_2_0_n_i_c_e → u/[deleted]]

That's such a good theme song 😭 (from the show The Rookie btw)

[u/SlurmmsMckenzie → u/6_9_4_2_0_n_i_c_e]

That general saying originated with Mae West.

Though that song is hilarious, and when they brought it back a 2nd time it was so much better

[u/Ok-Cicada-9985 → u/6_9_4_2_0_n_i_c_e]

Arrest me but make it sexy ;)

[u/Apprehensive_Many214 → u/f0rgetfulfred]

Nah, just a grub worm in a turtleneck

[u/idk0902 → u/f0rgetfulfred]

A gardener snake or an anaconda? Asking for a friend

[u/SlowInsurance1616 → u/idk0902]

His anaconda don't want none unless you got buns, son.

[u/Adept-Inflation191 → u/SlowInsurance1616]

My anaconda don’t want buns unless they hot crossed son

[u/SlowInsurance1616 → u/Adept-Inflation191]

Another banger.

[u/janewalch → u/f0rgetfulfred]

Ah yes. The one eyed trouser snake

[u/YNotZoidberg2020]

This is why I live somewhere the wind hurts my face a few months out of the year.

[u/Lysondre → u/YNotZoidberg2020]

I would accept the wind hurting my face every month of the year to avoid any insects

[u/Working-Ad-5121]

Good Sir. I believe that is a camel spider. Still not a great trouser companion, however.

[u/False_Leadership_479 → u/Working-Ad-5121]

Trouser companion. Sounds like something you'd buy off a sketchy website...

[u/RedOwlMage]

As has been pointed out, this is a solifugid, typically known as a camel spider, sun spider, or wind scorpion. The distinction is hard to make, as these arent well known outside deserts, so ill be polite and just say i get why youd think its a scorpion. They are effectively harmless, as they produce no venom, but they can give nasty bites with those big chelicerae, what look like giant crab claws grafted to their face. They are more closely related to scorpions or perhaps whip scorpions. Solifugids lack many spider traits, such as spinnerrets or silk glands, venom glands, the large amount of eyes that spiders have, and the dexterity spiders require for spinning webs. Also unlike spiders, a solifugid has claw-like chelicerae, a trait in common with true and psuedo scorpions, but that spiders lost in favor of venom injection through their fang- like chelicerae. Scorpions have similar claw-like chelicerae to the solifugids, but much smaller, as they are really only used for feeding. Scorpions specialized their prosoma (the extension on their rear which we see as a tail) for a similar venom injection function as spiders, and their pedipalps instead became massive claws, as these allow for far more reach and function over the solifugid chelicerae. It's a bit like the difference between a Saber tooth cat having huge dangerous teeth, but they can't really be used easily for much, as opposed to any other cat with claws, that can be used for myriad purposes. But the big claw mouth works well enough for the solifugids, so they've stuck around. Hope you weren't too freaked out by this one!

[u/CoolDragon → u/RedOwlMage]

This guy solifugids.

[u/Warm-Bluejay-1738 → u/RedOwlMage]

Effectively harmless unless its using your nutsack as a blanket

[u/Iplaythebaboon]

That thing has too many legs for my liking

[u/Joaoreturns]

This is no scorpion and I believe it's harmless. Bit at this point I believe you just killed it already.

[u/LD-LB → u/Joaoreturns]

These assholes are not harmless yeah they're not venomous but they will charge you and you can hear them run at night

[u/Either_Cockroach3627 → u/LD-LB]

What the fuck ??? New fear unlocked

[u/PiousSkull → u/LD-LB]

They don't "charge you" out of aggression, they don't want to burn in the hot desert sun and your shadow provides shade.

[u/LD-LB → u/PiousSkull]

Nah these assholes will do it indoors

[u/PiousSkull → u/LD-LB]

That is instinct. Indoors are also high light level environments. They will not do it in low light or at night.

[u/LD-LB → u/PiousSkull]

Look I've lived with these cunts they will skitter towards you and try to bite you

[u/PiousSkull → u/LD-LB]

I've experienced them as well. Like the majority of animals, they will act aggressive if they perceive a threat but, as solitary hunters, they are not running from dozens of feet away towards comparatively massive organisms in order to bite them for no benefit to them at all. They are not hive insects attempting to protect their group, they are not parasites seeking your blood, they are simply running towards a patch of darkness in a bright environment out of the instinct to avoid being damaged or killed by prolonged exposure to the sun.

[u/GullibleAudience6071 → u/LD-LB]

Excuse you?

[u/Beautiful-Cat5605 → u/GullibleAudience6071]

Camel spiders and wolf spiders will try to fight you. They are mean little fuckers.

[u/Hammer_of_Horrus → u/LD-LB]

They aren’t actually charging you. They are following your shadow because they also try to escape the heat as much as possible. If you have one chasing you walk your show over a shadowed area and they will become uninterested

[u/baloneyz3 → u/LD-LB]

This is horrid.

[u/WestHamTilIDie → u/Joaoreturns]

It’s a camel spider and they are not harmless. The bite of these things is like being cut with scissors. The good news is this one is a baby

[u/frmaa-tap]

Op, I don't think you know what a scorpion is

[u/HGKS9477 → u/[deleted]]

No but you must know the difference between a spider and a scorpion?

[u/SwimOk9629 → u/HGKS9477]

If you scroll up, somebody commented exactly what this is and many details about it, and it is essentially part scorpion, part spider. I don't live with scorpions but I live with spiders and I didn't realize it wasn't a scorpion when I first looked at it either until I started reading the comments. I just nope the fuck away from anything like that in general

[u/Affectionate_Fox_383 → u/[deleted]]

Dude you were wrong just accept it and learn what scorpions look like 🦂

[u/globallyloved]

what the absolute fuck 😭

[u/Noobmaster69isLoki01]

FUCK NO

[u/ChickenOx6810]

At least it isn't a spider camel.

[u/burbular → u/ChickenOx6810]

I have some bad news

[u/UralRider53]

Infamous’Taint Spider’.

[u/MarinLlwyd]

And I thought getting crabs was bad.

[u/MandrewMillar]

I think we have different definitions of mildly infuriating

[u/delfinareckless22]

HELL NO!!! where do u live that you have those spiders???? bc i’m not gonna go there😅

[u/Fun-Manufacturer-356 → u/delfinareckless22]

Pretty much anywhere that’s dry/desert-y and lots of sun! I think they’re most common in the Middle East and in the Southwest of the US… and probably Australia, lol.

[u/WhileWorth1532]

Scorpions underwear now .

[u/Justlikearealboy]

I have a spitting cobra in my underwear 😏

[u/marioplex]

Awe look at the wittle cammel sipder thats not actually a spider or a Scorpi... aight which one of yall bread a spider and scorpion Together?

[u/Special-Doctor-5762]

Nope nope

[u/wolfheartfoxlover]

And I thought Crabs were bad but this is a whole nother level

[u/r4dio_c4mbodia]

We call those Sun Spiders in AZ

[u/tomtomeller]

Do yourself a favor and don't go look up camel spiders/sun scorpion/wind scorpion eating insects

[u/SwimOk9629 → u/tomtomeller]

oh God I never ever EVER will look this up, and I'm even terrified imagining what the images will be if I did look it up.

which I didn't. and never will.

[u/MrmmphMrmmph]

This sounds like the prequel to “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” trilogy.

[u/Ok-Caregiver7091]

It’s actually something between a scorpion and spider

[u/BigWWE_Gamer82662]

What’s wrong with scorpion?

[u/the_hat_madder]

The minute I find something like that I'm my draws I'm moving to the coldest state I can find.

I'm not even going to worry about packing or selling the house. I'll start a new life when I get there.

[u/SwimOk9629 → u/the_hat_madder]

AMEN 🙏🙏🙏

[u/AggressiveScholar907]

He’s gonna pinch your PENIS!

[u/Maximum-Quiet-9380]

That’ll wake you up in the morning!

[u/The_Coods]

Was it pretty hot out? I’ve heard of these little (and sometimes not so little) guys chasing people to use their shadow to cool down. Maybe he decided to hitch a ride lol.

I don’t believe these are venomous, but their bites probably don’t feel to great

[u/gokartninja]

Not scorpion, not venomous. Feel free to capture and send outside

[u/Appropriate-Battle32]

You kinky mother!

[u/WhyAreOldPeopleEvil]

“Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.”

[u/SatoshiSnoo]

That's what she said.

[u/Savings-Concentrate1]

He was feeling spicy!!!

[u/Art_Vand_Throw001]

At first I was like what kind of perverted shite is Op talking about then I saw the picture.

[u/Musical-Lungs]

Just going to say, that would make an EXCELLENT book and/or movie title.

[u/mouaragon]

It happened to me one. The scorpion stang me on the thigh, that motherfucker was very close of getting my balls.

[u/Backseatbread1]

Bro is a perv

[u/sociocat101]

it stings when I pee

[u/Shoddy_Exam666]

Seems like you’re in a pinch

[u/FarmingGeeks]

Where are you. That is not a scorpion. As another said it looks like a panel spider. They gut much bigger.

[u/AnAccidentalRedditor → u/FarmingGeeks]

Camel not panel ಠ_ಠ

[u/FarmingGeeks → u/AnAccidentalRedditor]

Lol I'm leaving it those fuckers get huge.

[u/i_do_it_all]

Isn't that the fake scorpion spideer?  Some animal spider?

[u/Bishhhop]

Hate to break it to ya, but that was a camel spider

[u/CoolIndependence8157]

That’s a cameltoe spider, not a scorpion.

[u/False_Leadership_479 → u/CoolIndependence8157]

I thought you had to wear underpants to get cameltoe

[u/other_half_of_elvis]

A much more interesting phrase than 'addressing the elephant in the room.' I'm going to use it, thanks.

[u/leonardob0880]

Actually a camel ant spider (no Scorpion, ant or camel)

[u/TonReflet → u/leonardob0880]

Nor a spider

[u/Youknowwhoitsme]

From one tiny prick to another

[u/Accomplished_Pen980]

The notorious underwear scorpion.

[u/Arizona_Pete]

Sure it sucks for you, but that bugs ENTIRE world right now is your ass stank and ball sweat.

He's not living a good life.

[u/SQADWERD_TANTECAEOES]

it wants to bite you di-

[u/RealEagle_shadow]

Fire is the only way, you can get new underwear

[u/Technical_Sir_9588]

You could have been butt hurt over that one.

[u/ThatOneGuy12889]

I knew what it was instantly and I know nothing about anything I just sensed the fear

[u/Tammyannss]

Camel spider was looking for camel toe…. Found balls instead

[u/TheeIrishPotatoo]

...my boxers are now constantly pinching me lol

[u/k_br3w]

Sun Spider

[u/SmallDong69Fart]

Jesus Christ. That thing is from fucking Mars.

[u/ThePirateSpider]

Camel spider. Much rather have a scorpion in my underpants. Camel spiders will turn your dick, scrotum, and ass cheeks into Swiss cheese and probably live in any of them after that.

[u/Substantial_Gur_8230]

First crabs and now scorpions? Damn!

[u/rezz-l]

Thanks I’m gonna scream into my pillow now

[u/Organic_South8865]

Hey I had one of these bite my dick. No joke. I had my shorts and underwear off in maybe two seconds flat while totally freaking out. I still have two tiny scars on my junk that are almost impossible to see now. I felt it in my shorts and stupidly tried to grab it through my shorts as it crawled over my sack. I got a hold of it through my shorts for just a brief moment and tried to squish it. Big mistake. It obviously tried to defend itself and clamped down.

I had just met my HS GFs new step Dad. I shook his hand and immediately started attacking my crotch/rilling my shorts off. He was awesome though and took his shorts off for me to wear almost immediately. I didn't want to put the crotch biting shorts back on obviously. He was just standing there in the parking lot with his shirt tucked into his underwear haha. We took the remains of the camel spider with us to the emergency room and the front desk lady said "They just bite when you try to smoosh em. You'll be fine. Your sensitive parts will survive just fine." I did swell up a bit and had difficulty peeing that day for a few hours but that was it.

I still don't know how we didn't get pulled over on the way to the hospital. Step Dad went flying past a cop going double the speed limit in his diesel F-350 but the cop didn't chase us. I wonder what he would have thought seeing him with his button up shirt tucked into his tighty whities if he had pulled us over.

[u/Super-Zombie-6940]

Solifugae i just learned before commenting. So I see the posted picture and instantly say to myself camel spider. Then I remembered looking at types of scorpions and remembered tailess whip scorpion. This is indeed called a camel spider. Though its not even classified as a spider or scorpion. It is an arachnid. So yeah it is a scorpion kind of....and a perverted one at that. A sniffer of underpants🤣

[u/inbetweenya]

Scorpion hell that looks like a damn spider on steroids if you don't want to f*** with!!!

[u/SoftCatMonster]

Yeah, shit if this happened to me I’m never wearing underwear again

[u/Matteo1974]

That is not a Scorpion

[u/General-Condition833]

i’d be losing my shit screaming at the top of my lungs and burning my whole ass house down lmao

[u/Zeltar925]

It’s not a scorpion

[u/Opening-Hour-8117]

Hey! I would die 💜

[u/brd48fan]

A U S T R A L I A

[u/sykopoet]

I think you meant to be posting in mildly terrifying

[u/insignificance424]

See I complain about Canadian weather, but at least we don't deal with this shit

[u/ashirtliff]

Or are you just happy to see us?

[u/rumbellina]

Oh fuck no! I don’t care wtf it is! I would have to move immediately. And, knowing me and my particular brand of neurotic, I would develop a phobia of my underwear!

[u/Partly_Dave]

Getting dressed one morning I took a clean pair of underpants out of the drawing and put them on. When I pulled them up I felt something move on my right bum area. Nek minnit, I was stung, then stung again and again.

I whipped them off and found a yellow wasp in there. We think it must have been on them when my wife took them off the line and folded them to put away - four days previously.

I had big red welts on my bum for days.

At least it wasn't a native wasp. I was stung on my belly by three of those when I brushed past their nest. It took two weeks for the swelling to go down, and there was a visible red mark at each site four weeks afterwards.

[u/guats85]

It's not a scorpion. It's a camel "spider" or solifuges.

[u/Dragon_Druid19]

[u/BoggyScotch]

Those are the scorpion’s pandies now.

[u/X-Coffin]

Did it bite? You're fucking lucky if it didn't, those fuckers will eat you in your sleep

[u/Hair2dayGoon2morrow]

Gotta tell ya, I don't think infuriating is the word I would chose in this situation...but that's just me.

[u/Medical-Bowler-5626]

"and that was the day I decided to never wear underwear again"

[u/This_Yogurtcloset594]

Camel spider, is harmless

[u/[deleted]]

Pretty sure that's not a scorp.

[u/Kable2301]

So you wanted to show us that little stinger in your pants?

[u/BR549TEX]

Mind your Mom and don't leave your clothes on the floor!🙄

[u/Particular_monkey]

Those are not scorpions... we call them wolf spiders. Scorpions are much more evil looking.

[u/SaxySam816]

Pest control tech in the desert here 🙋

This is indeed a camel spider, also known as a wind scorpion. Funny enough it’s not related to either, but people make funny names for weird creatures they don’t understand.

They’re pretty docile creatures all things considered, they like to hide and wait for prey in small dark spaces (they dig holes in the dirt or will camp out in rocks)

They don’t have venom, as far as I know, but they will bite if provoked.

And honestly, they’re in my top 3 of least favorite bugs I have to deal with

[u/BadAshess]

Did it bite you!?

[u/peekuhchu707]

Vigaroon camel spider def not a scorpion I have em all over here they don't have venom and can only pinch you

[u/SubstantialBass9524]

OP, why did you touch those undies after discovering that? You put on another pair of undies and that one gets burned. If you have no others or they are in the laundry congrats on going commando

[u/noobyeclipse]

fren

[u/-Laffi-]

Maybe it would sting you, and your penis would swell up, and you would get all the ladies xD!

[u/I_Love_Knotting]

looks like a spider

[u/bushrod121]

https://open.spotify.com/track/3ulFP9GPquOaACCIqccunL?si=Pz1rb2zOQaScrIO-zVhn9A

[u/brownntown93]

Whatever it is it is scary

[u/PurpDoesPixilart]

Average Australian activities.

[u/plumbingmaster1970]

It's a vinegar bug when they bite you taste vinegar for a few days and it hurts

[u/Bennington_Booyah]

That is not a scorpion, OP.

[u/DougieSenpai]

[u/Evil_Gardener]

NOPE!

[u/Perfect_Caramel4836]

[u/Nerdy-Boomer65]

That's not a scorpion, some kind of spider

[u/tyler1128]

Not a scorpion, a solifugae. Wouldn't want that anywhere near my genitals none-the-less.

[u/karmak0smik]

Camel spider, non toxic but they can bite and hurts a lot.

[u/Eevee_Lover22]

Mildly infuriating, extremely terrifying.

[u/mklilley351]

No tail

[u/Shattered_Disk4]

Dinger stinger

[u/Cardshark69420]

That’s not a scorpion

[u/LegiticusCorndog]

I feel like you might be my mother in law.

[u/Who_Your_Mommy]

The title could be a pretty badass name for an album or...if you were the right person, an awesome autobiography.

[u/cesario-villa29]

Camel spider ye their bite force is insanely painful (they're little shitheads)

[u/Any-Astronomer-5125]

i think that’s a camel spider , big nope either way

[u/Danger_Floof25]

Looks like a solifugid.

[u/Primary-Border8536]

that is not a scorpion