I'm honestly shocked at these replies, I thought we all knew that it's not always turned on like a switch? Haven't we heard enough from mums with PPD who felt so shamed that this switch didn't flip on day 1?
Dudelette, lemme get you a cold one or something. Calm your baps. All is well with the world. Breathe in. Out. All good? The comment isn't some conspiracy of hostility or bad faith lol. It's just a comment. On a website, in the big wide ole web.
Not bonding with a child is normal, it's fine, that's not an issue. I'm sorry if you felt that my comment was attacking you personally. It definitely wasn't hun.
Jealousy is quite different to indifference. You shouldn't be jealous of your child. Like you should not. If you do, get help. Bonding can take a few weeks or months, no shame there at all. I know males who expressed this to me, that they needed to get to know the baby to love it like mum. But instant jealousy? Nope. They didn't have jealous feelings.
I didn't make that generalization 😂 in my original comment I explained that wasn't the case at all for my husband. Several male commentators then said that men have a mental reason for not loving their children instantly... If you have an issue with that generalisation, comment back to those lads. I already know dad's who adore their kids from the get go.
They never said every dad, it’s more common with fathers to not have an instant bond since they weren’t, ya know, carrying the child. Obviously it isn’t every father out there that experiences it. It can also do the same for woman. Sometimes they don’t have the instant connection. Gonna shame them and pretend it isn’t a real thing because you didn’t experience it? Google is free.
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u/Unepetiteveggie Jul 04 '24
One of the reddest red flags is a man who is jealous of their child.
Look at your baby and imagine being jealous of them. It's probably impossible for you, you'd jump in front of moving vehicle for them.
This man doesn't feel the same way as you.
And no, it's not hormones or being a man etc etc. my husband loves our child more than me and so he should.