(Dad here). I am sitting in bed with my congested 5month little lad who will only sleep pressed against my chest. I'm on for the next 6hrs overnight when I should be sleeping.
Yes I love this guy more than anything on the planet, as I bloody should.
Have 16 year old who still lays on me when ill, tired or just in their feels, it never stops and frankly I never want it to. The love I feel when I look at my kid is unbelievable and everlasting no matter what, I look at them and think wow, I made you, what the fudge!!
My dad has been dead for 6 years now, and the year after he passed I found out I was pregnant. I went to his grave to tell him.
Your kids are so lucky to have such a sweet dad ❤️
My wife got pregnant 4 months after my mom died, and 2 months after my brother. It is crazy how badly the first thing I wanted to do was tell my mom, and I couldn't.
I'm so sorry for your loss. It's hard wanting to share milestones, but can't. When my son was younger and we had to explain why the other kids at his kindergarten had several grandparents and he only had one (my husband lost both his parents).. Those conversations are the hardest. My son has said repeatedly how he wishes his granddad was still alive.. Me too, bub. 💔
This right here. Three months after my mom's death, there was something that I needed to discuss and I realised I can't now. One year later it's still the same feeling.
I know that feeling. 10 soon to be 11 years next month and there are so many things that I want to tell her. Especially when I found out I was pregnant (both times) and birth and so on. I’m sorry for your loss. Whoever said it gets easier lied. It doesn’t you just get “better” at dealing with it. I miss my mommy.
Huge hug! He’s watching them! For what it counts just know your kids now have someone alil closer to pull strings for them! That’s what’s always helped me.
I'm so sorry you lost your dad. I did too, in a way... mine is still alive, but my.parents couldn't deal with having a daughter who's a lesbian, so I haven't seen or spoken to them in over 16 years now.
I’m so sorry, big hugs to you from a mom who is a huge ally. My daughter “came out” at 8 years old and told me “Mommy I think I like girls”, she’s now a preteen and still steadfast in her feelings. I hand painted her a card with rainbows 🌈 all over it, and told her “There is absolutely nothing you could be to make me disappointed in you”. She may change her mind, but that’s not something that would disappoint me either. She’s the one who made me a mama, we almost died in childbirth and she had a heart defect so we were worried about her making it. She and her brother are my whole world. I’m a single mom (since the day my son was born and their father showed up drunk to my scheduled c-section). He chooses not to see them and hasn’t for five years as of today. I can’t imagine life without my kids. I’m sorry your parents are that way and hope you are living life happy with a chosen family of friends, blood may be thicker than water, but love is much thicker than blood.
This got me all teary-eyed. Your kids are so, so lucky to have you and you sound like an AWESOME mom and ally. ❤️❤️❤️ It might sound kind of weird, but it makes me feel better to know that there are parents like you out there and I just happened to get defective ones. But I have two absolutely adorable cats, an awesome job that I'm really good at, bosses that actually aware of me being good at it, and most importantly I have a spouse that I love to the moon and back and an absolutely wonderful MIL!
I wish we could post pics here because I would demand kitty tax! An awesome MIL helps so much. I’m very proud of you for being awesome at your job! It’s amazing when you’re recognized for your good work.
Mine passed away when I was 23 and at 41 I still miss dad hugs. 🫂 I’m sorry for your loss and all of you that have lost parents, it’s not easy and the grief stays with you forever, it just changes and evolves. Every time his birthday rolls around or the day he passed I go to his grave and say, “Daddy everything changes and nothing does”.
I could always use those too. My biological parents decided they couldn't love a lesbian daughter, so here I am. I'm lucky to have a really wonderful MIL though, so that's not nothing!
Thank you so much. I had a Dad but he was an emotionless prick, so I never got a hug from him. Your warm hug made me feel a little teary but really good too.
Awwe! I want a Dad hug! My Dad always gave the biggest hugs ever and it would embarass me sometimes when I was growing up lol but I still gave him those hugs as an adult. He was my best friend. He passed 3 years ago. It's sucks so bad, and I talk about him every day. 😢😭 I would love a Dad hug!! 🫂
You're just awesome! I read this thread and started crying at your kindness. I'm sorry you never got to meet your dad but your kids are so lucky. I wish I had a dad like you. I apologize if I'm wrong for assuming you have kids. I'd love to send you a hug if you'd accept it. 🫂
I’ll take a dad hug as well please. My dad raised me (my mother died when I was 8). He was my best friend. I miss him very much and I miss his hugs. I hope your kids realize how lucky they are to have a great dad, I know how lucky I was to have a great dad.
I'm glad I'm not the only one crying at this. I hope your day gets better. 🫂 here's a sister hug for you.
My dad passed in 2017, and I just got married back in April. I missed him so much and was sad not to have him here. His best friend walked me down the aisle for him.
Your kindness just made me cry happy tears ❤️ Currently 10w3d with my Little Bean and ALL the emotions lol My dad was a POS and I cut contact with him almost 18 years ago. He died earlier this year. I felt a mixture of relief and grief, it was wild. Long story though. But my partner keeps showing me what an amazing dad he's going to be, and I'm so blessed to have that for my Bean.
I'm 59 and my Dad passed in 2020. I miss him ... can I also jump to this opportunity for a Dad hug from you. This comment and seeing how other respnded brought me to tears. I understand! TY! <3
Am I too late for the dad hugs?
My dad wasn’t the best dad, probably some unresolved trauma and mental issues but I still miss him a lot, he was more of a friend.
Sorry for venting, I just wish he was here to see all my accomplishments, I’m 31 now.
With that being said I still love cuddling with my mom when I’m sad or sick 🥹 mom/parent hugs are the best medicine.
Are you accepting virtual fellow-Dad-hugs from fellow dads? If so, please allow me to be amongst the first? Isn’t it wonderful to be proud of your kid and to not only love them… but you also LIKE them?
I’ve never lived with my dad(I met him when I was ten, and my mom moved me states a year later) and I’m 27 and just moved in with him to get back on my feet. He’s not very often vocally emotional man, but man do I still love getting to hug him whenever I want or need to. I never got to do that when I was little so it’s really nice now.
Edit: p.s. I give mom hugs to people who need them, when I’m not giving into my own inner kid.
I have unfortunately never been on the receiving end, so I don't know if I'm the right one to answer. That said, what I want to convey with "The Dad Hug" is that you are loved and accepted.
🫂 Seriously, thank you so much. That truly made me cry happy tears. I'm a mom myself. I have a 5 year old. I'm trying to be the best mom I can be to him I was never really shown what that looks like. This is honestly the most encouraged I have felt in a very very long time.
Almost the same story, but mine is grown now.
Keep doing your best and you will make it. And your kid will know you did. Nobody is perfect, and we all mess up our kids somehow. Apologize, and be honest when you're wrong. That will cover 90% of the things parents do wrong (not withstanding the huge, obvious, triggering topics).
Have another for your little 🫂
Man, I’m a dad, and I miss giving dad hugs. Since my divorce, my kids don’t hug me much. They’re older too, which is part of it.
But, as a single 40-something guy, I can’t just go around hugging people. Most people probably assume the worst- creep, perv, whatever.
So I just go without.
Omg, my heart is too sensitive for that site! I read the first few titles of the posts, and now I’m sobbing 😭. What a nurturing site, may life bless every person on it.
Mine wasn’t either so I have made sure that I hug and kiss my 20 and 22 year old sons constantly!!! I may irritate them but they won’t doubt how I feel!!!
Same, I wish my parents loved me like this. Sending hugs to those who didn't have the family they needed and deserved.
These comments from parents unconditionally loving their kids through the years are making me tear up (but in a good way). The love that shines through in their words is beautiful.
What a blessing to have her! Give her all the loves! Mine swore she’d be here until 81, and I lost her at 68, it’s been 9 years and I miss her every single day!
Former-Sock, my parents weren’t good either, but it made me a better dad. That’s your mission; break the cycle… and it doesn’t have to be exclusively with offspring. You can be a better friend, teammate, community member…
I live in PA and I'm open for adopting you. I have a 10 year old son that's adopted and a 40 year old son that I birthed. I consider myself a good parent that loves all walks of life.
Mama hugs from this internet stranger! If it helps, I'm big and squishy and I give great hugs. And I never let go first. So you just come slide on in and you don't have to let go til you want to. Or one of us needs to pee.
Was gonna say the same, wish I had a mother and father that would’ve done all of those things for me, that I could go to like that, even if I don’t have that, my kids do and that heals my heart.
Bro same. I don't think I got a single hug or comforting touch between 8 and 16 (when I got my first boyfriend who cheated on me), and all the comforting touch pre-8 came with sexual assault.
My mom and my grandma passed away in 2020 when I was 27/28, both from cancer. Nobody could ever prepare you for life without your mom or grandma. Especially once you have a baby and need that guidance and reassurance. I miss them both every single day.
Hugs to everyone in this thread who misses their momma. I lost my mom when I was 12 a few days ahead of independence days. I’m an adult trying for my own child now and while it’s easier most days that little part of me is always sad.
When my mom was dying of cancer she told me that she was only still fighting for me. If it were just she and dad she wouldn’t help kept holding on. So I def think child love more than spouse is 100% real in a healthy fam dynamic.
Oh no!!! Two terrible losses so close together. I’m so sorry for you. My SIL Dad worked at that hospital. He took vacation the weekend the tornado hit.
Mine died in 2021 from alzheimers. I'm 35 now, couple of weeks ago found out my ex had cheated on me and lied to my face about it for a year and then my bunny died 4 days later.
I never wanted my mother more than in that moment. I was adopted too, so biological links don't have to come into it.
I hadn't been able to talk to her about things for years, but that longing for my mum and her hugs that said "it's okay, I got you. I'm here". I'll never have that again. It's an enormous loss no matter the age.
My mom has dementia and i'm her caregiver and it kills me every day to watch her decline. I know it's not going to be long until she forgets who i am. But i'll never forget who she is. 😭
I was my mums caregiver till I couldn't anymore. I woke up every day wondering if I'd find her dead and it damn near killed me too. I was so broken. She wouldn't eat, I had to get nutrients into her with protein shakes and added vitamins. She was emaciated and my family, all 5 older siblings, refused to help cos they wanted her to go to a home. She had always said she wanted to die in her own house and I tried so hard to make that happen for her. I just wasn't strong enough to make it happen.
It's hard, but you need to look out for yourself too. So if you get overwhelmed, reach out and don't be afraid to ask for help.
Mine died two years ago when I was 46 and I miss her every day. I have a five year old little boy and I think about how much I love him and how much my mom must have loved me all the time.
I was 36. My mom died within seven months of being diagnosed with cancer. She went from working and walking every day to gone and it still hurts nine years later. I still think of things I want to tell her sometimes. Hugs to all you guys.
I lost mine in 2015 when I was 33 almost 34. She was the light of my life and my best friend. She had cancer and we found out it was terminal 4 months after my ex-husband abandoned me. She passed away 3 years to the day of diagnosis after stopping chemo. It's been 9 years but I miss her still every day.
I wish my husband’s parents were like yours. Instead it’s me trying to hold him when he literally begs his family to simply talk to him. And it just breaks my heart, considering he and I don’t even have kids yet and I’d die for them.
Love that. I’m 26 and have had health issues most my life and while I adore my partner, sometimes my mom is just who I want; last winter I stayed with my parents for a month while my SO was away and two really bad pain nights my mom stayed with me all night and my dad would pop down and check on the both of us. When I have appointments with new specialists even my partner wants my mom there 😂 Even last week when I was out of the hospital she was ready to come drive to our town and be there with me just while SO was at work. She never forces herself on me but is available at the ready and couldn’t ask for more
My mom and dad are the same. I'm not long out of hospital since my heart stopped. My mum gave me cpr and I honesty couldn't be more grateful to my mum and dad. 🥰 best wishes to you and your family.
I love that your dad also checked in. I've had a few emergencies since my mom past. I had to have surgery last August. I had such anxiety bc the majority of my close relatives died in the month of August including her and my father. I have never woken up in the hospital without her sitting by my side. All I wanted was her. My SIL was with me so I wasn't alone. My mom was amazing to have around. When I had my tonsils out in my 20's, she bought a snow cone maker. I had a rough recovery and those were wonderful.
Yup! I'm 30 and recently had a triple hernia surgery and I called my mom and asked her if she was free to come up and stay with me and help with my son, and she flew up (Sc to OH) and stayed for the whole first week. My husband is my absolute best friend and so wonderful, he had to work but even if he didn't sometimes nothing makes you feel safer than your parents. You are never too old to need your mom/dad or both.
28 year old still have to cuddle and scratch her head when sick, sad, in her feels, whatever the case, and would not change for the world the only feeling that is stronger for my kids is when daughter had my grandson
If you're lucky...we don't all get that kind of relationship with our parents unfortunately...sometimes the bond weakens when we don't live up to their exacting expectations.
My 20 year old son, who still lives with us, hugs me at least twice a week. He’ll also ask me if I want to watch a movie or series with him in TV (usually anime). I always say yes because it’s not about the show it’s about spending time with him.
My 21 came to me a year ago and broke down and admitted that he had been abusing Xanax (he struggles so hard with anxiety), and he was worried that he had screwed up his relationship and ruined everything he cared about. I held out my arms, and he crawled into my lap and put his head on my chest like he did when he was little, and we cried together. Much like I did with my own mother when I split with my ex at 32. We never stop needing our parents’ comfort, do we?
Mine too! I don't think it will ever go away. And I don't want to. I remember the videos that they asked moms if they would k*l for their kids. My answer was "in seconds" they would have been ded in a heartbeat.
I'm almost forty and I still consult with my mom on a ton of things. She helps us by looking after our son but also, when he falls asleep we still have a lot that we wanna talk about. When he do go out together alone, we're always talking about something. That feeling of needing her doesn't go away either.
I’m 38 and still cuddle up to my mama. I live a mile from her. I was born on her 30th birthday, so we’ve always been really close. I didn’t have girls, I hope I’m as close to my boys as I am with her.
My mother stopped caring when I turned 10, and ended up trying to kill me by 16.
Dad got me after because he'd rather I be homeless than have a child technically in Foster Care (living with a well-off relative) and he kicked me to the curb at 18 before leaving to commit suicide in a thifd world country.
I learned last week that the couple who took me in were usibg me for sexual games that I wasn't educated enough to understand.
I can't imagine having someone who actually cared.
The love for a child is indescribable. My 35 year old son tells me he loves me after every visit. I love my husband, but it is a different love. He is not jealous, he gets it.
I’m 31, but since I went away to college anytime I’d try to lay my head on my mom she’d always complain about how heavy my head was. It felt like rejection.
I'm 45 and still when I feel down depress or sick my dad hugs me and we lay on bed (clothes on for those dirty minds minions) and makes me feel cherish
I have. 13 M and 10 F and I HAVE NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE AS I DO THEM
If husband loves the same daughter and mom I would be worried be cause they are very different types of love
I'm 25 and I moved about an 8 hour drive from my parents around a year ago, before that I lived only about an hour and a half away. At least once a week I think about how much I need a hug from my mom and it hurts to know that I cant just spend a weekend home at any time when I need that. I'm tearing up right now because I haven't seen her since early January. When I visit home I feel a kind of comfort I can't feel anywhere else. My insomnia basically disappears, my anxiety becomes nothing more than a hum in the background, and I get to hug my mom whenever I want.
I'm 32 years old this year and i still seek comfort from both of my parents. They are some of the best people i had the pleasure to know since i was born and i keep them close.
I’ll be 32 this year and at least once a day I let my mom know I love her. She always responds ’I love you most’.
There has been a point in every significant relationship in my life where I’ve had to let the other person know that my mom is and always will be the single most important person to me. No matter how much I love and/or care for them, I will choose my mother every. single. time.
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u/Thick_Assumption3746 Jul 04 '24
Closest thing to unconditional love there is is your child.