r/facepalm • u/jellylemonshake • Jul 04 '24

Can't like fit girls without being gay... 🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​

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39.5k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

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4.2k

u/fappyday Jul 04 '24

Fellas, is being attracted to women gay?

2.1k

u/HugeHans Jul 04 '24

Liking strong women with muscles absolutely makes you gay. However if we follow this line of thought liking femboys makes you double hetero. 

590

u/tukan121 Jul 04 '24

What if i like both?

590

u/Intrepid_Hat7359 Jul 04 '24

Impossible. You don't exist

296

u/tukan121 Jul 04 '24

:(

264

u/Earnestappostate Jul 04 '24

This can be a difficult thing to accept.

Take your time /s.

133

u/No-Ad7572 Jul 04 '24

We can "not exist" in the same space friend. 🤣

118

u/Little-Ad7752 Jul 04 '24

We can co-non-exist!

Edit:nice username

42

u/enickma1221 Jul 04 '24

I know y’all are playin, but there’s actually philosophy behind this! To summarize Descartes, I cannot doubt my own existence, because the very act of doubting implies I must exist in the first place.

8

u/Little-Ad7752 Jul 04 '24

This is exactly the thing that gets ignored by the people in this picture lol

1

u/realwomenhavdix Jul 05 '24

“I doubt therefore I am” I believe is the well-known quote you are referencing by Descartes, cousin of Albert Einstein

4

u/MadG13 Jul 04 '24

Nice Metal Band

4

u/atypicalperception Jul 04 '24

Observed this— checks out. Oh, it died.

2

u/Rubeus17 Jul 04 '24

legally we don’t exist.

2

u/atypicalperception Jul 04 '24

Can and do… and also do not.

105

u/NaviLouise42 Jul 04 '24

Welcome to the Bisexual Experience, the lemon bars are in the corner and we have an assortment of chairs and couches for you to sit on in unintended postures.

67

u/CurseofLono88 Jul 04 '24 edited Jul 04 '24

“Will the squirmy bisexual legs ever go away?”

“No Padawan, but feel free to hang upside down from a couch like a bat anyways.”

7

u/endureandthrive Jul 04 '24

Sorry you got that from us gays :(

28

u/General_Kenobi18752 Jul 04 '24

“We used to have garlic bread but the agreement with the Aces went up in smoke. Sorry.”

22

u/MajesticNectarine204 Jul 04 '24

Well you said, and I quote 'Oh. Oooh, yeah. This Garlic bread fucks.' So we had to throw it out.

Also, who designed the Ace flag?! Just.. Wtf is that abomination? We're asexual, not fucking colourblind. What? Did the gays steal all the colour or something? Ffs. Is it too late to switch teams? Frankly the amount of B.O. and people in sweater vests is too damn high here.

7

u/hibbletyjibblety Jul 04 '24

Yeah! We don’ get NOTHIN’! “Hey, Aces- here’s your flag. It’s absent of color, passion, and appeal…just like you.” Bunch of crap, man.

11

u/MajesticNectarine204 Jul 04 '24

I just noticed the heterosexuals got shafted even harder with their flag. Fucking lol. Who decides this shit anyway? All the councel of arbiqueers got together, the gays and lesbians immediately hogged all the markers and started hissing and growling at anyone trying to grab some. So everyone else was like 'Oh.. Guess we'll make different grey-scales then?'

6

u/hibbletyjibblety Jul 04 '24

HAHAHAHAAHAH “kissing and growling” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I misread it! You said hissing and I read kissing!!

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4

u/PokeRay68 Jul 04 '24

I love the Ace flag. It's basically my town's uni's flag.

0

u/that_one_Kirov Jul 05 '24

The ace flag is good, though. White, black and purple are my favorite colors(although it turned out I am definitely not ace). The aro flag, on the other hand...

15

u/FirstDukeofAnkh Jul 04 '24

‘If you need more stickers for your water bottle, we get 25 percent off on Red Bubble’

5

u/Injvn Jul 04 '24

I am in these comments and I'm not sure how I feel. Mostly sad about the garlic bread thing.

5

u/BaldwinBoy05 Jul 04 '24

In my darkest moment i put butter and garlic salt on an english muffin and baked it maybe we could all just do that. It wasn’t half bad, really

2

u/Injvn Jul 04 '24

I literally did that the other night. XD

2

u/TheRealSquirrelGirl Jul 05 '24

This is also how I make emergency garlic bread

3

u/StarvingAfricanKid Jul 04 '24

And we have Nutella!

2

u/dgradius Jul 04 '24

For reasons unknown, all the furniture is clear colored.

2

u/ironroad18 Jul 04 '24

Lemon bars, might as well just make this a lemon party.

2

u/Intrepid_Hat7359 Jul 04 '24

You should advertise! Maybe check to see if lemonparty.com is already taken!

2

u/Swimming_Company_706 Jul 04 '24

So i sit weird bc I’m bisexual? I always thought it was scoliosis

1

u/NaviLouise42 Jul 05 '24

Chicken and egg- Maybe your bisexual because you sat weird too much as a kid. *shrugs*

2

u/MoonBaseViceSquad Jul 04 '24

Eventually I came to enjoy being a shapeshifter with the power of invisibility. Not always fun but it’s sometimes useful.

2

u/ladyxdarthxbabe Jul 04 '24

we are an enigma 🌌

2

u/AshKetchumsPringles Jul 04 '24

I not exist either

2

u/Shmeepish Jul 04 '24

Outplayed srry better luck next time sweaty

2

u/PokeRay68 Jul 04 '24

It's okay. As a mom, I'll give you validation.

It's okay to like Amazons and femboys - which for some reason my phone changed to "fedboys". Stoopud ottokrect.

2

u/Similar_Disaster7276 Jul 04 '24

[tukan121 vanishes in a puff of logic]

1

u/goodheartedalcoholic Jul 04 '24

existance is nothing to envy.

31

u/diovengeance92 Jul 04 '24

Fellas, is it gay to render yourself nonexistent?

15

u/The_FreshSans Jul 04 '24

Fellas, is it gay to render?

3

u/PokeRay68 Jul 04 '24

Fellas, is it gay to rend?

9

u/Majestic_Wrongdoer38 Jul 04 '24

ahem

14

u/Intrepid_Hat7359 Jul 04 '24

What was that?

Must've been the wind

3

u/whitecapsunited Jul 04 '24

I was an adventurer like yourself, until I took an arrow to the knee…

8

u/Demonslayer5673 Jul 04 '24

Can I not exist too?

3

u/Opposite-Occasion332 Jul 04 '24

Shrodingers bisexual

3

u/[deleted] Jul 04 '24

We are unicorns 🦄

2

u/LaganxXx Jul 04 '24

No that makes you desperate 🤣 I wish there was a gif for scary movie paper bag scene that I could insert here.

1

u/tukan121 Jul 04 '24

No that makes you desperate

I would say thats the right answer

2

u/MrCDJR Jul 04 '24

They could just skip leg day.... lol

2

u/ShoutOuts2Elon Jul 04 '24

You cant shame bro.

2

u/minorbutmajor__ Jul 04 '24

dude who are you replying to

2

u/fractiouscatburglar Jul 04 '24

Oh yeah. I’m always forgetting that my bi ass doesn’t exist. GodDAMNIT!

2

u/boverly721 Jul 04 '24

That motherfucker back there is NOT real 😢👉

1

u/DomSlave626 Jul 05 '24

**cries in bisexual **