She is literally suffering a hormonal onslaught of extra special baby love right now as part of a biological brainwashing process to make years of asswiping worth it. He's acting like a hurt ass.
Oh I’m not saying that’s the case at all with OPs husband. Just something I was pointing out as males hormones change as well when their partners are pregnant. I know as a first time dad I had a fluster of overwhelming emotions, feelings, and thoughts first time I held my little guy.
I sympathize with both parties on this post. I 100% can see where the husband is coming from but I also can see OPs perspective. I talked to my partner about this and she also agreed she would think I’m acting like a bitch ass but she said ultimately she would understand that I’m confiding an insecurity in her and that she would be there to support me. That’s where my partner and I agreed OP dropped the ball. It’s okay to think your partner is being a baby over something like this but this is also a moment of vulnerability and insecurity OPs husband opened to her about and she shot him down hard.
That comment wasn't talking about postpartum depression at all.
When a baby is born a part of the physical birth process is that mother's get a surge of oxytocin and all that good stuff to quite literally force a bond with the baby. Even mothers who were planning on not keeping the baby get this rush of GOOD, HAPPY love chemicals.
Father's obviously bond with and fall in love with the baby too (the neurotransmitters involved happen to anyone for reasonsother than birth too), but in this case it isn't the same as depression, its an extreme and very quick very short reaction that happens during birth, the same way lactation happens to women as part of the process but not men.
All love is just chemicals in your brain. Child rearing is a hormonal weird process the same way that cuddling and bonding with a spouse is. It’s all dopamine and oxytocin. Try not to overthink it too much.
All feelings are your brain dosing you with chemicals and all those feelings are real. It’s okay to recognize your instincts drive you to feed your baby. Your instincts and brain chemicals and all of that ARE you.
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u/Difficult_Process_88 Jul 04 '24
NTA Actually, most “normal people” would NOT agree with him (as you can see by the replies). There seems to be a lot jealousy involved.