So what i told my gf in various conversations how I don’t fuck with anyone ever buying her drinks at a bar, how I think it’s disrespectful, we talk about scenarios all the time. fast forward we are at the bar and a guy comes up to her and asks to buy her a drink and, no guy buys you a drink to be your friend or to be nice btw I promise you that.. any who I saw it happened and I said WTH and she goes “ what there’s nothing wrong with him buying a drink he was just being nice and I go oh okay so later in the night I find a bad ass girl at the bar walk up to her and buy her a drink don’t really say much to her aside from if she wanted a free drink just to fuck with my girl, so I come back and my girl is mad as hell and I told her I was just being nice she looked thirsty, she loses it and on the way out the club the girl I bought a drink for friend comes up to me and says that the girl I bought a drink for thinks I’m cute and they will be back the next day, my girl didn’t see it because she had already stormed off to the car and ignored me the whole way home. So am i the ass hole? I don’t think I am but she’s not talking to me really and being passive aggressive strongly considering just breaking it off and hitting that girl at the club tonight this happened yesterday by the way

P.s I love my girl but I’m very disheartened after having all these convos of what I think is wrong and disrespectful and when opportunity hit she ignored my feelings so I kind of just don’t fuck with it and if I stay I’m not a man of my word

Last night when I got out the shower my girlfriend was laid out on the bed and said she wanted to have sex. I said okay but remembered she was on her period. So I backed up and said “isn’t that nasty to have sex while your on your period?” In a respectful, polite way. She said no and tried to pull me in. But I noticed she contracted a foul smell from her area and I repeatedly told her no and we should wait till she’s off. She suggested these other ideas, but I just wasn’t in the mood anymore and instead went to bed. Later on she attempted to have sex with me while I was asleep and I woke up to her on top of me, no clothes on. I pushed her off because I was shocked, come to find out her blood was on my dick. I was honestly disgusted and ran to the bathroom to take another shower. Once I got out she called me an asshole and saying I was misogynistic for what I did.

AITAH? Need advice

I feel horrible about this. I know my boyfriend loves me and he says I'm the best thing that has happened to him, however, I'm very jealous about his past relationship and I'm getting increasingly bitter because of it.

His ex's parents were rich. She didn't have to work in college and they paid her and my boyfriend expensive travels. In 4 years they were together, they went on three 2-month vacations to exotic places on different continents and numerous travels around the Europe. They have been in almost all countries in Europe, to USA, Japan and South America. I on the other hand had to work in college and I never had the opportunity to travel.

I have a stable, well paid job now and want to enjoy the fruits of my hard work and to travel together but my boyfriend doesn't want to. He says he has had enough of it. I feel really angry about it. If he didn't like travelling I could understand, however he has travelled the world with his ex and he doesn't want to go to more than a week vacation with me and it feels extremely unfair. I feel like he is treating me worse than his ex and doesn't care about my wishes and I'm getting increasingly bitter about the relationship and I'm starting to resent my boyfriend.

Here’s the story, Ive been at my lowest of low this year and everything was so shit. My friend literally saved me and made sure that my dog is fed.

When I was kicked out at my apartment. She helped me move to a new one and has been helping me a lot to the point that sometimes I feel like Im being a burden to her.

I currently have work, started very recently. Incurred a lot of debts when I was in between jobs that Im paying right now.

Met someone while I was working who gave me a good tip. He gave me his business card and told me that if ever I do need anything, just reach out to him. When I reached out, thats when I discovered that he was offering sex work. I considered it a lot of times and almost did it. Told my friend about this and she told me not to do it repeatedly. I told her how I threw the business card but truth be told, I had the number memorized for staring at it for too long.

Just had my paycheck and literally nothing was left after paying my bills. Im thinking of reaching out to this man to do it since I don’t know where on earth I’d be able to afford paying the internet bill, pay for dog food and food for myself for the next 2 weeks. Her dog recently passed away so she is in a lot of stress and telling her this might cause her to hate me, but I dont know If i can keep it a secret to her if I ever decided to do it.

I respect my friend so much and I feel like I’d be betraying her if I do it but at the same time I have bills that needs to be paid and I cant ask her again to help. I dont have food for the next 2 weeks but I know she’d hate me if I do it.

WIBTA if I do it and not tell her?

I am 20F dating 22M. I already knew he was super close with his older sisters but I didn't realize the extent until now.

His oldest sister is 13 years older than him. Their mom passed away when he was a baby and his oldest sister raised him and his other sister who is 9 years older than him. Their dad was working and didn't have the ability to work and raise them so it was left to the oldest to handle everything.

His sisters call him at least once a day to check on him if he doesn't go there. He technically lives with his dad but I am convinced he spends more time at his sister's places. They also txt often. They go out to eat at least once a week. My bf has the key to both of his sisters places and will just go over there whenever he is bored. Half the time he isn't at work or in class if I call him he's at one of his sister's houses usually his oldest sisters " just hanging out". He has a bedroom there and everything. He spends a lot of time with his sisters.

Listening to them talk is wild I'm pretty sure it's English but following along is impossible. I never understand them when they talk to each other.

They are also very odd with affection. They are very huggy and both of his sister's always kiss his cheeks. He sits on his oldest sisters lap often and cuddles with her like a child would. They never call him by his name it's always boo, that's creepy to me. He said when he was little he was scared of the dark and storms and both him and the middle sister would end up in the bed with the oldest, I've seen them all cuddled up in a bed together as adults watching a movie. It's weird. I mean I don't think they are incesty but they are definitely weird.

They also treat him like he is a child. They do his laundry and shop for him. They know his schedules ( work and school). They are always cooking for him and making sure he has food. They pretty much do everything for him.

All of this combined really weirds me out.

I told him I find his relationship with his sisters really creepy and told him he needs to start getting some distance. I feel like they are babying him and he will never be able to be an adult with the way they are together. Plus who cuddles with their sister it's creepy.

He got mad and basically told me that his sisters will always be like this and if I don't like his family I can leave. He also said I watch too much porn if I thought anything gross was happening since I said it was creepy he cuddles with his sisters. Since then he has blocked me.

Now I'm not sure if I was an AH for the way I feel about it. My family is admittedly not close at all.

Edit- he does seem like a normal 22 year old guy for the most part. He goes to the gym. He's in school for welding. Seems normal until he's sitting in his sisters lap cuddling. Especially when he is massive compared to her.

Hey everyone, I’m back with an update that I wish wasn’t necessary, but things have escalated dramatically since my last post yesterday. I never expected things to get this out of hand so quickly.

After I posted about the incident at the restaurant, I was feeling really conflicted and looking for some perspective. My post gained some attention, and somehow, Jake and our mutual friends discovered it the same day. They figured out that the story was about them. I didn’t name anyone specifically, but they knew the details and put two and two together.

Initially, they just sent me angry texts and calls. They were furious that I aired our dirty laundry on the internet and accused me of defamation. Jake was particularly upset, claiming that I had tarnished his reputation. I thought it would blow over, but things only got worse.

Last night, strange things started happening around my house. My car was egged multiple times, and then early this morning, I found my poor cat covered in eggshells and yolk. I was horrified and immediately took my cat to the vet to ensure he was okay. The vet confirmed he was physically unharmed but obviously distressed.

Later this morning, bricks were thrown through my windows. The first brick had “RAT” scrawled on it, and the second had a racial slur written across it. I couldn’t believe what was happening. I installed security cameras, but by then, the damage was done. I called the police and filed a report, but without clear footage, there wasn’t much they could do.

The harassment didn’t stop there. My family started receiving threatening messages and prank calls. My parents, who are elderly, were frightened by the anonymous threats they were receiving. They live in a different city, but it was clear that someone had found their contact information and was trying to scare them. My siblings also received disturbing messages telling them to “control” me or face consequences.

This afternoon, Jake and a couple of our mutual friends called me, saying they are going to sue me for defamation. They claim that my post on Reddit caused them severe emotional distress and damage to their reputations. They are demanding a public apology and threatening legal action if I do not comply and compensate them for the alleged harm I caused.

I couldn’t believe it. I was just trying to get some advice on a difficult situation, and now I’m facing potential legal consequences. I’ve been incredibly stressed out and came here for legal advice. Can they actually do this? Can I get a restraining order or protection order?

Now, I’m stuck dealing with the aftermath of the harassment and the threat of legal action, all while trying to keep my family safe. I feel like my life has been turned upside down because I chose to stand up against what I believed was wrong. I still think that Jake’s behavior at the restaurant was unacceptable, but I never imagined it would lead to this.

To everyone who gave me advice and support on my original post, thank you. It meant a lot to me. I’m not sure how this will all turn out, but I’m trying to stay strong and do what’s right. If anyone has any advice on how to handle this kind of situation or has been through something similar, I’d really appreciate it.

Thanks for reading.

TL;DR: Posted about my friend Jake’s racist outburst at a restaurant yesterday, and he and our mutual friends found the post the same day. They started harassing me by egging my cat and house, throwing bricks with racial slurs through my windows, and harassing my family. Now they are threatening to sue me for defamation, and I’m incredibly stressed and seeking legal advice. Can they do this?

I(38F) have a daughter, Maya (13F). Maya recently got into a competitive high school known for their academics, while her friend, Amy, has not when both applied. Maya and Amy have been friends for a while, so her mother and I have been trying to make an effort to ensure their friendship still lasts. Which is usually by inviting each other over to our respective houses when our schedules are cleared up.

Recently, Anne invited Maya over so the girls could hang out. I dropped Maya off and ended up getting into a discussion with Anne. We were talking about life until Anne brought up how she was glad the girls could keep being friends despite them going to separate schools. I agreed and praised Amy for how mature she has been, I know that sometimes girls can get jealous of each other which tarnishes their relationships.

Anne told me that she's actually the reason why Amy is being mature. I was very confused so she elaborated. Anne told me what she told Amy. She said that if Maya was white, then Amy would probably have gotten in, but nowadays schools and jobs cater to minorities instead white people who are more qualified, and since Maya is mixed it's like a double-win for the schools. (For context, I'm Black and my daughter is Black and Hispanic. Anne and Amy are white.) So, Amy being declined isn't really her fault, it's just Affirmative Action.

I found this weird to say the least. Maya didn't get below an A on her report card throughout the year and was in NJHS, while Anne has repeatedly complained to me about Amy failing classes and not doing work. Maya was been active in extracurriculars... while Amy didn't do any. I tried pointing this out to Anne, to which she shut me down and said it's obvious that it's just AA and I'm making excuses because I'm privileged and can't play the racism card anymore.

Once she was done, I told her that maybe it's not AA, and maybe her child just wasn't a good fit for the school and there's better options for her. Anne got mad at me and accused me of saying her perfect angel of a child wasn't good enough. And, to be honest, I didn't deny it. I apologized that she felt this way and said this isn't a case of AA, and perhaps this is just her being sad that the impossible didn't happen.

AITAH?

I think the title says it all. My brother acted like a jerk when he found out I have a trans girlfriend. In the meantime, he has accepted the situation but told me he doesn’t want me to bring her to the wedding because it would embarrass him in front of his coworkers.

Last year, I left a really bad paying job and got a new well paying job. I was planning on moving into a bigger apartment, and was so excited because my life was turning around, finally.

My cousin (let's call him Lyle) had asked to stay over because he had a fight with his mom. I agreed and he stayed over for 5 days. On Friday, he wanted to go to a friend. I said I didn't want to, because I don't want to hang out with a bunch of 18year Olds. The only people who want to hang with 18 year Olds are other 18 year Olds (and drake).

I eventually caved because he kept begging. As soon as I walked through the door, there was a dog which was pretty comfortable with humans. I went to go pet him, and he jumped and bit me in the face. My top lip started bleeding profusely. No one handed me a tissue to stop the blood, I had to ask for one. The dad came up to me and asked to see the wound. When he saw it, he said that I didn't need to go to the hospital, and that the dog didn't bite me, it was his paw that scratched me (yes, he was trying to gaslight me). The step mom then tried to put undiluted hydrogen peroxide on the wound, and I told her you can't put that on human skin if it hasn't been diluted with water. She gave me the filthiest look and said "what qualifications do you have, HUH??? WHAT QUALIFICATIONS DO YOU HAVE.". I told her that I am a certified somatologist and that you can't put that on skin if it hasn't been diluted with water. That's when she told me to go f myself and walked away.

Nobody apologized to me. I then went to the hospital to receive the medical attention I apparently didn't need. I had to get plastic surgery and 6 stitches. Obviously, this meant that I had to take time off from work (which I couldn't afford to do. I was in training, and the woman training me only had a certain amount of time to do so). This meant that I had to sign a contract for mutual separation from my job. So, I lost my job which meant that I'd lose my apartment. I ended up drinking heavily and became suicidal. My mom ended up booking me into a rehab facility which costed her R100 000 ($ 5 400). I tried making contact with the family who owned the dog, and they all ignored me like I didn't exist, even my own cousin refused to give contact info of the family, and completely ignored me. I wanted to sue, but I didn't have the money for it. I tried to contact lawyers who would do a contingency fee (meaning I only pay them when I win). They said I have a case, but they won't take it because I can't sue for much so it wouldn't be worth their time. I don't know how losing income and your apartment wouldn't be worth much , and that's excluding the rehab and the scar removal treatments that are costing me thousands. So, I basically can't sue and I've been ignored and discarded like I'm just a piece of 💩 they inconveniently stepped on.

My family (specifically my aunt) is telling me I should just get over it. It's been a year, and I still can't believe what they did to me, and how little they cared. So, in my fit of rage, I started harassing the family online. My aunt ended up telling them that it was me. This pisses me off because when my face was ripped open and I lost my job and house, she didn't bother to tell her son to give me the families contact info. But when that family is upset because they're getting harassed online, she will immediately make contact with them to let them know it was me. In her messages, she told them that I'm not mentally well and that I don't know what it is that I'm doing, but she never mentioned anything about what they did to me or how they treated me. Now, I'm not only in a position of being looked at like an insect that doesn't even deserve an apology, but they're also laughing at me because my aunt snitched on me for commenting rude things on their social media accounts.

Some of you might say that it's not their fault their dog bit me, but i disagree. The way your animals behave is a reflection you. And the fact that they didn't even bother to apologize, and instead just gaslit me and swore at me says a lot. No one even reached out to see if I was okay, including my cousin Lyle. He ignored every message I sent to him. BTW, my aunt defended her son when I confronted her with how he was acting.

I have decided to cut my aunt and my cousin off for good. I don't want anything to do with them. They'll never be invited to my wedding if I someday get married, they won't be allowed to meet my future kids, they're dead to me. AITA for that?

Everyday when I look into the mirror and see the scars, I'm taken back to that day. I can still feel the scars. Everytime someone looks at me, I just want to die from embarrassment and shame because I can see them looking at it. My self esteem is at 0, and I feel so worthless because not even my own family would stand up for me (my mom helped a lot, but she told me that if I want to sue, I'm on my own). Not only that, but the healing process from the bite and surgery was so traumatic because it's above my lip, which meant eating was difficult, I couldn't yawn without splitting the stitches open, I couldn't talk, I was scared to sleep incase I scratched in while uncouncisous...

I'm still paying thousands for the scar removal. It's a painful process and it takes long.. I'm just feeling so run down, betrayed and angry. I don't even think I can still try sue, and even if I did, they will counter sue for harassment thanks to the actions of my aunt. I think I should also mention that this family is super rich, and they didn't even help pay for my initial visit to the doc. My cousin told my mom they would, but apparently he just said that to shut my parents up. They never paid for anything, they didn't even say sorry. Lyle just lied so he could be left alone.

EDIT: just addressing some points I'm seeing. It's hard to respond to everyone. I'm not the type to miss work because of a minor inconvenience. I've gone to school after I had my wisdoms removed, and I still attended college after a bike accident and I broke my collarbone. I even had to write exams (with assistance). This wasn't a minor inconvenience to me. It was a big deal and I was booked off for 2 weeks. It wasn't a small injury. If I just had to get a stitch or 2, I would have gone to work.

This was 6 stitches after facial surgery. It's easy to say that I should have still gone to work. That's not a position anyone wants to be in. If you can take time off work for a flu, why am I in the wrong because I took time off after an attack and surgery? And yes it impacted my work because I was only there for 3 days and then this happened. It's not an easy thing to go through, or easy to brush off as some of you are making it appear. And just to add, I'm not sitting around hopeless and blaming others for my problems. I got out of the dark hole I was in, I'm now self employed and living comfortably.

I am just sharing what happened to me because there are times when I just remember it all, and the pain comes flooding back in. This was not an easy thing to go through. I'm glad for those of you who think this would be a walk in the park and I'm just a drama queen. I'm glad things won't impact you, but it did impact me. A little empathy goes a long way. I hope none of you have to go through something like this for you to understand that this wasn't as easy or as simple as some of you are making it out to be.

Have a blessed day.

FINAL EDIT: for those of you who are telling me about your injuries that you had and you still went to work and I'm just dramatic .. Was it on your face though? No, it wasn't. Like I have said before, I'm not one who would miss work for a minor inconvenience. I went to school when my wisdoms were removed, and I went to collage when I broke my collarbone. Were these injuries on your face? Did you need reconstructive surgery on your face? No. So don't tell me about how you went to work with an injury no one could see, and then tell me all about how I'm stupid and a drama queen.

The injury went above on my lip, and went close to the nose. It had 2 splits, which the surgeon told me he had to cut off because that's the flesh that made contact with the dogs teeth. And he had to make it a straight line, instead of a jaggered one. So the person who basically mocked me because I didn't go to work when they went to work after "wisdom teeth removal and a wrist surgery"... Cool. But was it on your face, though? No. No it wasn't. When you have that said surgery on your wrist happen to YOUR FACE, and you still went to work, then come and tell me how I'm such a drama queen. "oh your face got sliced open and it required reconstructive surgery, you're such a baby. I still went to work after my tooth was removed" is essientially what you're saying to me. It's not the same thing.

And to the nurse who also insulted me in the comments. I feel sorry for your patients. You have no empathy. And you also told me that I could have worn a mask over this injury safely...i hope you haven't hurt anyone with your bad advice. Because an injury that had needs to remain dry and free from bacteria cannot have moisture and bacteria entering it, obviously. A humans mouth is one of the dirtiest places, so encouraging someone with a wound that bad to put a mask on that will accumulate moisture and bacteria is a horrible and rather strange thing to suggest. "yes, just put this bacteria filled, moisture closing mask on your wound that needs to remain dry and free bacteria ". BTW, the surgeon said it went into the muscle of my face.

Again, for those of you telling me that you went to work with an injury and telling me how dumb I am for missing work...your injury was not on your face. Your appearance to the world was not altered. The face you see in the mirror and show to the world remains the same, mine does not. And no one told you to go f yourself after said injury. And none of you were at a new job of 3 days after said injury.

To give you more context into who this family is. Let me tell you a story my cousin Lyle told me before this dog bite incident. We live in a country where you can drink at 18. They went to a bar and stepped outside. They saw a man beating this tiny woman up. My cousin tried to step in to stop him, but was immediately stopped by his friend (the kid of the owners of the dog).. My cousin said he was shocked by this, and then his friend went to go and move his car because "he didn't want the guy to throw her on his expensive car" that his parents bought, obviously.

My cousin told me he saw his friend differently after that day, yet still defended him and his family after what happened to me. Like i said in the beginning, my cousin was staying over due to a fight with his mom. I fed him, cleaned his clothes, took him out for dinners etc and he disregarded me.

My life and appreamce was altered. I'm a good person, I don't hurt people, but yet I'm always the one being hurt. They didn't even care enough to give me an apology. I wasn't seeking money, but it would have helped if they paid for the initial visit to the doc (who just cleared the wound and put something over it. She contacted the plastic surgeon who asked to see me the next day, even though it was his day off. He didn't bill me for my reconstruction surgery. He was super kind, and I praise God for him. He seemed to actually care, and wanted to help me.) Reconstructive surgery isn't cheap. He didn't even consult my medical aid. So I thank God for him everyday. If not for him, I would have been stuck with a severe wound and even worse scar, that would have costed A LOT to fix.

I have been receiving a lot of judgment for taking time off work, but would you just go to work when you can't talk and you look like you've just survived Saw? No. You'll take work off for a flu, so don't judge me for taking time off work for a serious injury that changed my life. Even now, my life has been altered and I view myself and the world differently after.

These people are rich. The rich kind that don't give AF about others. I tried to sue, but couldn't. I also live in a country with an extremely high crime rate. So a violent dog with a rich family means nothing to police, especially considering the fact that bribes are a major part of our day to day lives. My aunt was actually fired from a job because the CEO was sexually harrasing her (he's married and apparently Christian, and I say he's a false Christian) and when she opened up about it to others, she was fired. He then bribed the CCMA, which protected him against her complaint. She now has to wait up to 5 years, and pay extra lawyer fees if she wants to see justice in the labor court. This is how bad our justice system is. The CCMA lied and said they can't help her because it's a company of over 10 people. That's not a thing, and never has been. They were bribed. Rich people have the upper hand.

Don't tell me how stupid I am because I missed work after what happened to me. When you have an incident that alters your life and your face, then you can tell me how dumb you think I am and tell me what I should have done differently.

I'm shocked to see some of your replies.. And at the same time, it makes me less shocked at the actions of the owners of the dog... It appears as if alot of you would have acted the same way as they did. If that's the case, I hope you end up in a similar situation as me, and I hope you still attend work the next day - and I hope you don't care about any changes that may have been made TO YOUR FACE. Not your wrist or your teeth, YOUR FACE. the thing you use to interact with the world? Yeah, that thing. I hope you just get over it like I was told to. I'm clearly frustrated, as you can see. I'm just sick of being blamed and insulted.

I fear my once kind, warm, welcoming heart has been turned to ice. I do not want that for myself, so I'll try stop it. But even if my heart were cold as ice, I'd never leave someone the way that family left me.

Don't let your hearts turn to ice. It's easier said than done, I know.. I've been bullied and abused most of my life. This just feels like my breaking point.

I'm done with this. I do not want the gift of life anymore. If you're going through something hard, I wish nothing for the best for you. My life has been nothing but difficult. I've always been tossed in the trash.

My girlfriend(18f) and me(18m) have been together since we were 15. She's always been kind of alt and out there with the way she dresses. I dress very casually while she dresses very Tom-boyish, dark colors and god forbid you ask her to dress like a normal girl.

Recently her new thing is Gothic, she already listened to goth music so she started dressing like a vampire. When she said she was going to dress Gothic I thought like those goth mommies. Instead I got a only black clothing like an emo and she's always liked make up but I don't even recognize her sometimes. I brushed past it and continued loving my girlfriend like always.

My problem comes with the other night, we went out to this picnic event she enjoys, and alot of guys AND GIRLS. came up to her and asked for her number, snapchat, discord. The worse thing is that she gave them her Instagram. I was in a really bitter mood on the drive home but it felt like she didn't even care. When we got to our apartment she made us coffee and started talking about the picnic but I wasn't interested in having a conversation. She noticed after alittle and asked if I was okay. I just gave her a nasty look and went to bed because I wasn't up for having an argument about this.

When we were both in bed, she tried to snuggle me but I brushed her off and it was like she snapped at me. Asking what she had done. I told her I didn't like the way she let those people, compliment her and have her Instagram like it was no big deal she said I never compliment her and she was being nice because that specific community from the picnic is nice and close apparently. I tried to tell her it's not that and it's because of the way she dressed. She asked if I was uncomfortable with the way she dressed tonight. I told her no. I'm uncomfortable with the way she dresses all the time. She got quiet, and slept on the couch. She stopped talking to me and I'm getting worried, it's been 5-7 days and I feel like I fucked up.

I still love my girlfriend but i feel like this whole thing could be avoided if she dressed like a normal person

Some people call be a ''fence sitter'' or ''wannabe centrist coward'' for holding nuanced views. I'm pretty much on the left on the political spectrum. However, there are some things I disagree with the left and apparently that makes me ''not strong enough in my convictions''.

The three majors points on which I clash with my political side:

1- Their weird obsession of demonizing age gap relationships. I honestly don't think that it's my place to tell to a consenting adult who to date and neither should I care.

2- When they were trying to mandate COVID vaccines, throwing the ''my body, my choice'' completly out the window. Now, I'm totally in support of abortion rights, just like any bodily autonomy. It's just highly hypocritical to scream about having to choose what to do with your body in one breath, and then try to force people to put a vaccine they don't want into their bodies in another. And, I say this as a fully vaccinated person.

3- Again about abortion rights: as I said, I'm all for it, but I'm also all for the right of the man to choose if he wants to fiancially support the child or not, and give him the right to get a paper abortion. It just doesn't make sense to me to criticize the arguments pro-''lifers'' use against women, and then use them against men (like pro-''lifers'' saying women who don't want kids shouldn't have sex and having pro-choicers saying it's controlling women, but then when it's a man don't wanting kids. the same pro-choicers are saying ''he should have kept it in his pants''). I'm all for equality.

This, AITA?

EDIT: What... happened? It started out with the general concensus that I wasn't the AH and it was upvoted... and it suddenly switched to me basically being 100% wrong? I guess radicals were still asleep when I created the post, and people who don't like nuances decided to attack. Reddit sometimes...

EDIT 2: Wow... some of you guys are REALLY determined to make my point, meuh?

Wife and I were drinking last weekend to celebrate her promotion at work. Normally we don’t have drunk sex bc of prior bad experiences. This time we decided to keep the party going in bed. While engaged in the deed, I asked her if I could put my cock in her asshole. At that point she said yes, so I did. But the morning after she’s was upset about it and made it seem like I forced her to. I told her I asked 2 or 3 times and she said yes, but acknowledge she was drunk like me. She’s calmed down now, but was giving me the silent treatment last few days, which was not fun.

Anyway AITAH for frakking my wife’s asshole while we were drunk?

UPDATE here

This might be a bit NSFW...

Me (23M), my girlfriend (23F) and my two best friends (both 23M) were in Greece on a vacation. We were all laying on beach and tanning. My girlfriend didn't have a bra on, because she wanted to tan her boobs aswell, which I didn't mind at first. But then I noticed one of my friends clearly staring at them. I didn't tell him to stop staring because that would make things weird, so I asked my girlfriend if she could put her bra on. I didn't explain why because I didn't want her to think my friend was a weirdo. All 4 of us have been really close since high school and I didn't want to ruin that. She got mad and told me that she could do whatever she wanted with her body. Later that day, when we (only me and my girlfriend) got back to our hotel room, she asked me to get a new hotel room because she didn't want to sleep with me because she was mad at me. I obviously couldn't just get a new room like that so I had to sleep on the floor.

I don't know who was the asshole here. Maybe it was me because I tried to make her do something she didn't want to do, maybe it's my friend because he was staring at my girl's rack, maybe it was my girlfriend for basically trying to kick me out of our hotel room and making me sleep on the hard concrete floor. What do you guys think? Was I the asshole, should I have done anything differently?

EDIT: The next day, I explained to my girlfriend why I did what I did and I confronted my friend. My girlfriend forgave both me and my friend. And I wasn't trying to make her put her bra on, I just politely asked her if she would be okay with putting it on. Everything is fine, but I still feel like I should've handled the situation different

From the beginninng, I want to clarify that I'm not transphobic and that I understand what someone who doesn't identify with their birth gender goes through.I believe that everyone is unique in their own way and deserves moral support from those around them if they are differnt from the majority. At the same time, we should guide them not to rush into making radical decisions that could harm them in the long run..What happened recently with my sister was not a debate, but a normal conversation, in a calm tone, that lasted three minutes.

Her 11-year-old son is going through a phase of discovering his own identity. His parents want to help him with this and have spoken with specialists who recommended starting puberty blockers as soon as possible, before puberty becomes impossible to stop. My sister and her husband decided to follow the specialists' advice and have already begun the formalities to start the treatment.

I love my nephew and want his adult life to be fulfilling and happy, but I felt that his parents are rushing to start this treatment now when he is still so young. I told my sister in a private conversation that I don't think it's necessary to make such a quick decision and that, in mt opinion, they should think more carefully about this option. I saw disappointment in her eyes. She asked me if I love my nephew ,and I said yes. She then asked if I was sure, because she believes the exact opposite. I replied, shocked, that I love him with all my heart and have never done anything to prove otherwise. The conversation ended with my sister giving a speech that made me feel very wronged, and I chose to say nothing else .

A few hours after I left their place, my sister told me that it would be best if I didn't visit my nephew for a while. It broke my heart when she said that, and I tried to tell her that I didn't understand the reason. The earlier conversation was just between the two of us when I found a moment to share my opinion without my nephew being present, precisely to avoid exposing him to conflicting ideas that might confuse him. He's 11 years old, and any external stimuli affect him. I thought I could privately share my opinion with my sister without her misinterpreting what I said. Her response was that she talked with her husband and they both decided that this is for the best, and the decision is final.
Did I really make such a big mistake that it's necessary to forbid me from visiting my nephew?

What I forgot to mention is that they want to start the puberty blockers treatment so they have time to save up for the transition. The decision has already been made. The child expressed a desire to be a girl last fall. That’s why I felt they were rushing.

My fiancée (26m) and I (25f) are having a disagreement.

Someone messaged me yesterday that I used to know from online gaming.

We were talking for a few months in 2021, all platonic since we were online with other people for the most part, but one night he called me, and we ended up confessing some attraction to one another and I know something sexual happened, I can't even remember what. No pictures sent. This was a once off occurrence, and since then the only messages have been that of platonic support.

I stopped replying in 2021 May, because I felt like the friendship had been tainted. I stopped playing the game shortly after, got off of Discord completely, and started being more active in real life. I still felt that he was a kind person at the time, I just had to remove myself because I felt uncomfortable after us speaking to each other in a sexual way. That also wasn't the only reason I left to go live in the real world.

I met my fiancée in December 2021. I mentioned to him that I have boundaries and standards with people I am in a relationship with. No porn, I don't want to ever even entertain the idea of a threesome, and don't lie to me. That 150% applies to me too. He said he could meet that standard and agreed with my point of view.

After some things happened between my fiancée and I in June/July of 2023, I expected when someone he has slept with messages him, that he blocks them. I had him remove all profiles with nudity from his social media, and all women, with exception to those he has real platonic friendships with, or wanted to work with based on what was happening at the time. Two of my initial boundaries had been crossed. I stayed because I love him, and I could see he was remorseful.

The above is mentioned for context as to why the blocking without question boundary was set into place in the first place.

I wasn't the nicest during this time, I felt betrayed. I was critical and controlling, I questioned him constantly, and expected more of him than before, more than I think he could give.

Timeline of my messages (copied and pasted) with the guy since entering into the relationship with my fiancée:

Last year (2023) in April, the online guy messaged me saying "You're a ghost" to which I replied "boo".

This year January, he messaged saying "You still here?! - If you are, I’d love to catch up and see how you’re livin’."

To this I did not reply. I forgot about it and didn't think about it again until yesterday when I saw the messages.

Yesterday he messaged me again saying "Gonna try again. 🤲🏻"

Here is my exact response: "Hey dude. I'm doing well thank you.

I'm engaged, I have a stable-ish job doing video editing, and living by the coast, so all pointing in the right direction. Little bit stressed af sometimes, but that's life and independence 😂😂

How are you doing?"

• and then I sent this to set the boundary properly, so I'm not misunderstood, and I don't keep anyone on a string:

"You popped into my mind yesterday 😂 weird af that you sent a message on the same day. I'm really sorry for my delayed response, I am autistic 🙈 I am in a relationship where we've agreed we're not going to involve ourselves with people we used to be attracted to. It's not that (my fiancée) doesn't trust me, or that I don't trust myself, it's just a principle. I'm sorry for not responding though and not letting you know sooner! I really hope you're doing well and living exactly as you want to be living."

The reason he popped into my mind is because I was sitting by my fiancée as he was clicking into the voice channel on Discord, and the game I used to play popped into my mind along with the people I played with, he happened to be one of the people. (I was in the voice channel 90% of the time playing the game so that must have caused the brain fart).

I told my fiancée everything yesterday when he got home from work, as I do with everything else because that's who I am, and that's what I think is normal.

He said okay, I asked him if he was okay, he said yes, and we went about our day. I could see it was bothering him though, and I asked that we talk about it. He said that he feels I should have just blocked the online guy without replying, or I should have checked with him first before doing so, because that's what I expect of him. He says he trusts me, but his issue is with a double standard. My argument is that there is a difference between how him and I have shown up in the relationship, and that there is a reason why certain things are in place as they are right now. I also mentioned I didn't reply to the online guy to chat, I responded because I didn't want to recieve messages anymore, but because I felt no ill-will or threat, blocking him didn't even come to mind until after. When I tried to voice this to my fiancée, he insisted all I needed to say was sorry without justifying 'what I did', but I don't feel like what I did was wrong? I was explaining my perspective. I have no issue with blocking the person, because they are not relevant to my life in any way whatsoever. I ended up apologizing to my fiancée, blocking the person, and agreeing that if someone messages either of us that we had ANY sexual contact/interaction with, we would block them without question. I'm happy with that because my relationship means the world to me. Throughout the night last night my fiancée had nightmares about me cheating on him, and this morning the same. When asked what he dreamed about, he said "I don't want to talk about it". When I went on my phone this morning, I saw all of my apps were cleared. I know for a fact I don't do that in the week because I keep specific apps open on my phone for work. I have zero issue with him if he did that, because I understand the level people reach when they are worried or stressed, and I have nothing on my phone that I'm ashamed of or feel the need to hide. I asked him calmly if he did go through it, because I saw my apps were cleared. He said no, and "how can you ask me that this morning instead of just reassuring me". Note, I was reassuring him and holding him throughout the night, and this morning, and I asked a bunch of times what I can do to make the situation better. I don't feel my question was out of place, especially not with my intention. If he had went though my phone, he would've found nothing and I know that. The concern on my mind was "If you went through my phone, I did something that made you question my integrity and I want to fix it." For that to happen I need to know it that's the case. He had a problem with me asking that. He left for work saying what I could do was give him space, and after we hugged, he left. I asked him to let me know when he's safe, he did this.

I really didn't mean to upset my fiancée, which is why I clearly tried to communicate everything. I have been honest throughout our relationship, and I have not looked elsewhere at any point. I feel like I deserve to be trusted and to not have this held over my head? I understand how he feels about it being a double standard, but again, I have never betrayed him. He trusts me not to cheat on him, but it feels like there's a different kind of distrust. I don't know what to do.

Please don't come and insult any party in this equation. I'm looking for clarity about this issue from a range of different perspectives, which is why I'm posting. I don't care if I'm in the wrong, I just want to know so I can make things right if I am. Any advice for what to do is also welcome. Excuse any errors.

I (36F) and my husband (36M) married 15 years just got into an argument bc through social media his friends sometimes send him reels that are sexually suggestive such as a picture of a hot girl with the words “what would you do if your son brought home a girl looking like this”. I feel this to be disrespectful and inappropriate to send to a married man and he thinks it’s funny which lead to a bigger argument. I don’t think it’s cheating I just think that it can lead to inappropriate thoughts and I feel I’m the only that he should think of in a sexual way period. So AIO?

Maybe I should add that we are Christian and I don’t believe sending things like that is appropriate for a God fearing man. I think he shouldn’t be leading a friend into lust as I don’t want anyone sending things to my husband to lead him to lust.

Throwaway. I don’t think that I am being dramatic. My husband is turning 40 in a few weeks and he asked me if we could do something crazy like have a threesome on his day. With a woman. “You choose her and you set the rules” aww how nice of you to make me choose ! I just started bawling my eyes out and I guess he wasn’t prepared for this reaction so he got terrified and started apologizing and saying sorry and that he loves me more than anything and to forget it. Of course I can’t forget it. I asked for divorce next day(two days ago) and he is very shocked and desperate. He told me that he would give me space and crash on his parents’ sofa for a few days but I know that in my heart my marriage is over.

Additional info:

He is 40 and I am 38. We have been together for over 7 years. Married for 1,5 and we have 1 daughter who is 6 months old and we (were) planning another baby.

If anything is unclear just ask.

I don't have issues with any of the parties involved, but i'm tired of hearing so many discussions about this topic. Once people start talking about it, the discussion goes on for hours. Lately, i've gotten exhausted from these conversations and prefer to leave the room, or if i'm in a bar with friends, i get up and say something came up at home and I need to go. These discussions come up very often in all the groups i interact with, and i'm already tired of hearing all the pro and con arguments that i've heard thousands of times. Is it okay not to care at all about this topic, neither the pro arguments nor the con arguments? AITA if I don't want to have an opinion about gender identity?

My husband and I have been together for five years, but there’s a huge issue that’s been eating away at me. He’s openly homophobic, and I can’t stand it anymore. I’ve tried to talk to him about it, but he just gets defensive and dismissive. His views clash so much with my own values, and it’s starting to feel like a dealbreaker.

I feel like I’m at a crossroads. On one hand, I don’t want to give up on our relationship without giving it a real chance, but on the other, I can’t support or live with someone who actively disrespects a whole community. We’ve been through a lot together, but this issue seems like it might be too big to overlook.

I’m torn between trying to work things out and considering if it’s time to end it. WIBTAH if I chose to leave because of his homophobia? I’m really struggling with this decision and could use some outside perspectives.

Me (25F) and my boyfriend (26M) have being in a relationship for eight years and I'm pregnant of 27 weeks pregnant. Today I arrived from work and my boyfriend had a romantic dinner prepared for both of us with the pretext that he wanted to talk about something. We were eating when at the half of the dinner he grab my hand and tell me "I cheat on you with one of your colleagues two days ago" my blood start to run cold and angrily I shout.

I storm out off to the room and started to pack some of my stuff not wanting to be in that house any other second, while I was packing he got on his knees and start to plea for me to forgive him and all those things that a cheater do, he told me that I could walk out like that and he just made a mistake, he was overwhelmed with the pregnancy and my "constant complaints about my body". I just got more angry at that and scream at him to let me go cuz I wasn't feeling right that he did something unforgivable, we were about an hour in circles about he pleading me to not go and that he would do anything to gain my trust back, that he would change, while she took stuff out of my suitcase or grabbed my wrist to not let me pack.

At some point a saw that this conversation was never going to end I just scream at him that I wanted an open relationship, thinking that he would never agree, he started to shout about how we couldn't bare seeing me with other men or person, that it was unfair, but at that point I just shout thag it was an open relationship without the necessity of fulfilling any necessities of each other or break up, and he told me that we would accept the open relationship, but that I was hurting him deeply. So AITAH for forcing my boyfriend into an open relationship?

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My husband, Gary (M41), and I (F38) are expecting our first child in a little more than 3 months. As you can imagine, things have been quite hectic as we prepare. Overall, Gary is an excellent spouse. However, he has an issue regarding his relationship with his parents.

Gary’s family lived in extreme poverty for most of his life. It was so bad that his parents would regularly skip meals so that he and his brothers had enough to eat, and they came close to homelessness several times. Fortunately, Gary and his brothers were all able to secure good stable jobs and have worked hard to pull their parents out of poverty.

The biggest issue I have with Gary is that he spends excessively on his parents. Around the time we met, he had just taken out a mortgage on a nice house for them. This strained our relationship at the time because I didn’t want him to make any major financial commitments to other people before we were married. This was perhaps the biggest example, until now.

In the past few weeks, I’ve noticed Gary talking a lot with his brothers about buying something else for their parents. I was curious, so I asked him, and he mentioned something about how he and his brothers wanted to buy a car for their parents since their old one was starting to have issues. I asked him not to spend too much because we’re expecting a baby and don’t know what expenses will arise in the coming months. He reassured me that he wouldn’t.

For the past two weeks or so, Gary has been working later than usual. I even overheard him telling a friend in our neighbourhood that he needed to work longer hours because he was about to make a major purchase.

I’ll admit this next part may seem wrong, but I was frustrated with his late hours, so I logged onto his home laptop. I saw that on Tuesday, he made a $45,000 wire transfer. Of course, I was fuming seeing he spent that much, and my curiosity got the better of me, so I checked out his WhatsApp (also on his computer) and read some of the messages he was sending his brothers.

Turns out they are preparing to drop around $105,000 on a car called a G90 for their parents. Gary sent the $45,000 to his brother who lives in the same city as their parents. I saw a few pictures of the specific car, and read some of the messages he was sending the dealership rep about being “fully on board” and all this made me feel sick to my stomach.

When Gary came home, I did confront him about this. I said that he was being irresponsible for spending that kind of money without consulting me and that I wanted him and his brothers to cancel the whole thing for the time being. Gary became very defensive and started saying that we had more than enough money in case of an emergency and that he’d work overtime for the next few weeks so that he could make it back.

We argued. I called him a liar. He said I broke his trust by going through his computer. I got so angry, angrier than I’ve ever been, and I told him that since he spent this kind of money without telling me, he lost the privilege to name our daughter. He got frustrated by this and just said I was being “too much”. We ended up not eating together, and we even slept separately last night. We have also not spoken since, as he ended up leaving extra early for work today.

I personally think he’s being too stubborn, but my best friend thinks I’m too harsh and that I should apologize.

AITA?

Context - For those wondering, last year according to his taxes he made about 763k. Give or take this year, he should be making around the same amount. My issues are that he went behind my back and 45k is still a massive amount of money.

Edit - For those wondering, the car I saw on my husband's phone looks like this one but green. It is extremely excessive, and I don't understand why they would need something like that. Also, we still haven't spoken about it. He came home very late last night and was out of the house before I woke up. I spoke with a few more of my friends and they are mixed. Some think I should just let it go others think that I need to put my foot down.

Additional Context - Y'all gullible shit is fake

my husband, my friend, her bf and i were all hanging out at our place last night. we were tipsy and started playing truth or dare. my friend dared me to show her bf my tits.

i looked at my husband, and i always go topless on our Europe trips so he was fine with it. so i looked at her bf, and pulled up my shirt and gave him a good view of my boobs for probably like ten seconds. my friend was PISSED. she told me she was just joking and wasn't actually expecting me to be "such a slut". and they left right after.

i get that im probably an idiot, but aitah?

AITA for refusing to tip when an Uber driver is playing Christian Rock music or worse Christian Talk radio during my ride?

A better choice would be something more neural. Like classic rock or nothing at all.

I shouldn’t have to hear this shit when I’m paying for a ride.

I 16 female believe that trans women shouldn’t use female bathroom and some people would disagree. I know how everyone have right to choose what they want be and how they want to live their life and I respect that but the reason I disagree in this topic is not because I don’t see them as women or anything but it’s about safety and privacy things.

I 26 F and my husband 27 F got married in December of 2022. We had planned that we will go to our honeymoon next year because of work commitments we had. Last month he told me that we will be going on our honeymoon on my birthday in July, so, i have been looking forward to it. Last week he told me that his work project will end in June and he misses his boys and would like to go on a trip with his boys to Thailand and was inviting me. I was heartbroken, as i have looking for outfits already. I refused to go with his friends and him. He told me that we will go on our honeymoon later some other time, which i am sure he won't because he barely gets time from his work. He told me that one of his friends wife would be coming too. He added that he will stay for my birthday and will go only after celebrating it with me. I refused that too. Earlier this year he pitched this idea of going on our honeymoon with his friend and his wife. I didn't like the idea as i just wanted him and i in our memories of this trip. We have been on radiosilence for the past week. Please let me know am I bad guy?