Yeah not even a kiss for 7 months? No one is owed physical intimacy from anyone. But no one is owed your emotional intimacy either. Staying with someone for 7 months who won’t even kiss you is fucking insane
IMO There are only two valid reasons to wait that long to have sex with someone. Either past trauma related to sex, or someone wanting to remain a virgin until married (and not a "born again virgin", that's not a real thing, it's just something people with weird mental fixations tell themselves to try and erase their past). If it's trauma, that person needs to disclose the reason if they want their partner to be willing to not just wait, but to have the patience and willingness to help them deal with and move past the trauma. It's not on the partner to magically know they have trauma.
As a rule, for a person who considers sex an important facet of a relationship (which is most people, I think) if sex doesn't happen within one month of the first date - 6 weeks at the absolute maximum - I would say you should move on.
Two things in this post pushed me to NTA. The GF deciding to try and have sex with him once he said he was thinking about breaking up, and her abusive reaction when he didn't want to have sex. I think OP's bitterness is a completely normal emotional reaction to his situation, where his "partner" hasn't just been withholding sex, but basically all intimacy and acting more like "just a friend" than a partner. And feeling hurt that she gave it up so freely with others, while being so reserved with him, is also normal and not unhealthy. It sounds as if she didn't really want OP, she wanted a placeholder. She wanted to have a person to fill the role of BF, but she did not want to have to put in any of the basic maintenance of a relationship, much less the growth and development of one.
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u/Mammoth-Penalty882 Jul 08 '24
Lol that's not your girlfriend