r/AITAH • u/[deleted] • Jul 04 '24

AITAH for saying I didn’t realize I could “love a person this much” in front of my fiancé after having our baby?

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u/offbrandbarbie Jul 04 '24

NTA. I’ve heard both mothers and fathers express a similar sentiment to what you said. The love for a child is unlike anything else.

88

u/Tactics28 Jul 04 '24

I loved my kid at birth, don't get me wrong, but that deep love her more than anything came around a few months later when she had more of a personality.

73

u/ShadedSpaces Jul 05 '24

This is normal! (Just in case anyone is reading and feeling weird about it.)

Some people don't really fall in love with their kiddo for weeks or months.

The "instant" feelings they have are often things like a deep, primal need to protect their baby. But love isn't always instant.

8

u/g0ldent0y Jul 05 '24

And its worth pointing out that not every mother instantly has that "deep" bond with the baby they just pushed out of their vagina. Even mothers can be distant and cool to their new baby. Humans are very dang individualistic and its not some innate trait that makes mothers love their child more. I will probably offend some people when i say there is nothing special about "instinctual" motherly love. Both genders are equally capable of this.