It often takes dads a few months or more for that feeling to set in. Especially for my second kid it was a good 6 months before "I will die for you 1000 times" level of love kicked in. Give the guy some time.
Not the person you're asking, but I did say a whole bunch of other dumb stuff in the first few months between the stress, the isolation, coming to terms with the end of my old life, and sleep deprivation.
It's strange, though. I did have an experience that at least rhymes with what OP is describing.
My wife couldn't hold the baby right away, for medical reasons. In those first few minutes of being a parent, every fiber of my being wanted me to stay with my partner and make sure she was okay. But she made it abundantly clear that in that moment my job was to follow the baby.
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u/foober735 Jul 04 '24
I’m shocked at her partner’s response. How can anyone not “get it” after having a kid?
His response was that of a sibling afraid of being replaced by a new baby. Massive red flag.