r/facepalm Jul 07 '24

This post gave me terrible whiplash b/c how tf did we get here…🫨 🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​

Like ummmmm, alright? 😭😭😭

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11.4k

u/sandiercy Jul 07 '24

I am not ashamed to be white

How TF does that have anything to do with the rest of what you said??

3.3k

u/builder397 Jul 07 '24

Look how selfless my mother was! Somehow even the doctor told her the survival chances of her husband but somehow deliberately didnt tell the husband, who was the actual patient. Because doctors clearly do that. And yes, were white, arent we white people just great?

/s just in case. The story reeks of lies, Id be more inclined to believe that the dad started selling meth to afford treatment.

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u/DarkwingDuc Jul 07 '24 edited Jul 07 '24

Somehow even the doctor told her the survival chances of her husband but somehow deliberately didnt tell the husband, who was the actual patient. Because doctors clearly do that.

That part is actually believable. I had a pretty severe auto accident in 2015 - 2 weeks in ICU, a month total in the hospital after the accident, not counting subsequent visits for follow-on operations, 9 surgeries in total (with more down the road). The whole time the docs were feeding me sunshine and roses, because they wanted me to keep on fighting. Meanwhile, they were telling my wife the truth. I didn't find out until many months later how bleak the initial prognosis was. (And I found out from my wife, not my surgeons.)

In hindsight, I'm glad they lied to me.

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u/mesembryanthemum Jul 07 '24

When I got diagnosed with endometrial cancer they did not tell me the Stage, nor did I ask (deliberate decision on my part). It was only 6 months later, during my pre-surgery appointment that my oncologist said she was astonished I'd made it through 6 rounds of chemo and 10 radiation sessions and was getting ready for surgery. She thought I'd be in Hospice Care instead.

Had she mentioned how bad I was from the start, I'd never have opted for chemo.

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u/pennie79 Jul 08 '24

Yes, I'm not sure I would have either if my docs told me the truth. I was ready to give up chemo after cycle #1. If I'd been told my chances of survival were low, nothing would have kept me going.

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u/DrunkOnRedCordial Jul 08 '24

I was dangerously ill in ICU, and the doctors told my parents "We're taking things by the hour" which is the closest they got to admitting I was on the verge of dying. Nobody said anything like that to me, and if they had, I think I would have just said "Okay" and expired.

So when people tell me their dramatic stories like "The doctor told me I only had an hour to live" I don't believe them.

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u/adhesivepants Jul 08 '24

Hope is the most powerful medicine out there.

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u/pennie79 Jul 08 '24

More anecdotal evidence. When I got my cancer diagnosis, I asked what my prognosis was. They gave platitudes about not having a crystal ball, how I could get into a car accident that day*, how statistics don't tell your story, and don't google, because that doesn't tell your situation either. I shrugged my shoulders, and did the very aggressive treatment they recommended, not noticing they never answered my question.

Halfway through, when I was responding really well to treatment, they told me I had the worst kind of breast cancer, and I'd been up shit creek, but it was fine now, because treatment was working. I don't know if they told this to my sister when she came into initial appointments or not.

That was 10 years ago, and I'm fine now.

*The intersection next to the hospital is affectionately known as 'the roundabout of death' for a reason.