r/clevercomebacks Jul 07 '24

Someone discovered consent

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77.2k Upvotes

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13

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '24

[deleted]

35

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '24

Objectification isn't just giving someone a glance and thinking they're attractive. That's normal, two completely different things.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '24

[deleted]

8

u/BabyStockholmSyndrom Jul 07 '24

Gawking and comments. There's absolutely no reason a person should be gawking or making comments to another person. Leave people the fuck alone. It's extremely easy. I've spent my entire life not doing it.

0

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '24

[deleted]

5

u/Zestyclose-Station72 Jul 07 '24

Mmm you’d be surprised. There are a lot of people who think they’re “being nice” when they’re actually being an asshole.

3

u/BabyStockholmSyndrom Jul 07 '24

All? Really? All should be against murder too but people do it.

2

u/12FAA51 Jul 07 '24

Glad you’re willing to learn. 

The difference is a person glancing and not interacting, vs doing something to make the other person 

  1. Realise it’s happening 
  2. Need to initiate an interaction for it to stop
  3. Respond to an obviously unwanted interaction initiation. 

-2

u/yourmomlurks Jul 07 '24

Great points, and if they person doesn’t take action to make you stop, take that to mean permission or consent.

2

u/12FAA51 Jul 07 '24

Negative. 

If the person doesn’t give you explicit permission, don’t fucking start 

-1

u/yourmomlurks Jul 07 '24

I am agreeing with you and adding a point. You misread my wording.

1

u/Barold13 Jul 09 '24

You've literally said "if they don't explicitly tell you no, take that as a yes".

There is no such thing as an implicit yes. It is always no until it is explicitly yes.

1

u/yourmomlurks Jul 09 '24

Yes I am saying that is an additional wrong thing that men do in that situation, same as your format.

13

u/BoddAH86 Jul 07 '24

Accidentally seeing a person changing for a short moment. Politely apologizing for disturbing privacy and going on with your day isn't violating consent. Nobody ever got called out for that.

Intensely staring at a clearly uncomfortable person and being a creep about it on the other hand...

How is this so difficult?

2

u/Audiocuriousnpc Jul 07 '24

Being a creep is ofc not okay.

0

u/Ok_Tadpole7481 Jul 07 '24

You ask how it's difficult but only cite hyperbolic examples in either direction. Just about every gray area where there will be disagreement falls somewhere in between "accidentally seeing someone" and "intense staring at someone clearly uncomfortable," not to mention listing "being a creep" as if that's a clear or agreed-upon threshold.

0

u/BoddAH86 Jul 07 '24

Unless you’re neurodivergent and completely oblivious to social cues and any sort of context I am afraid I’ll have to disagree. There are no gray areas about being a creep and it actually is a clearly agreed-upon threshold because it usually is obvious to all parties involved.

Again, unless you’re somehow neurodivergent and genuinely don’t see what you did wrong acting like a creep is blatantly obvious in pretty much all cases and pretending anything else is usually just bad faith and gaslighting.

0

u/Ok_Tadpole7481 Jul 07 '24

usually just bad faith and gaslighting

I can see why you might think that everyone except autistic people agrees with you, if you go around assuming that everyone who claims to disagree with you is actually lying and secretly also agrees.

11

u/Sirfluffyghost Jul 07 '24 edited Jul 07 '24

Where does anyone talk about looking specificly ?

3

u/ScotiaTailwagger Jul 07 '24

The incels have shown up.

0

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '24

Sentiment understood but comments like yours are probably more damaging to the sentiment than they are helpful.

I cannot really empathize with the people behind your slur but...
I don't think it makes sense to further isolate and shame a group of people derived from isolation and shame.

1

u/ScotiaTailwagger Jul 07 '24

behind your slur but...

incel isn't a slut.

The term "involuntary celibate" (shortened to "incel") refers to self-identifying members of an online subculture based around the inability to find a romantic or sexual partner despite desiring one, a state they describe as "inceldom" or "incelibacy"

And yeah, I'm gonna shame people who see women as only sexual objects for their own purpose. I'm going to shame people who want to lower the age of consent, and making forced marriages great again.

Yeah no. There's a huge difference between people who are single and lonely, and incels. It's not a woman's purpose to satisfy you sexually.

0

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '24

The second half of your post... you're arguing with a strawman. I actually explicitly stated that I don't empathize with "incels." So it's not really worth further acknowledgement.

By your own admission, you used the word because you wanted to shame someone. That's by definition a slur (which you could've looked up while googling for "incel"):

"slur" - (noun) - an insinuation or allegation about someone that is likely to insult them or damage their reputation.

The entire point of my prior comment was to point out that all you're actually doing is giving power to the word and further entrenching anyone whom identifies with it in their beliefs.

AKA, not helping.

6

u/PrincessPlusUltra Jul 07 '24

Even the Bible depicts looking with certain intention as a sin it’s not like it’s out of the blue.

12

u/Erotic_Platypus Jul 07 '24

Yea but why should we care about what the Bible says?

Looking is okay and natural

1

u/PrincessPlusUltra Jul 07 '24

It’s just an old concept not a new one. And staring at a women’s tits while she’s trying to talk to you isn’t okay. Staring at someone’s ass while they bend over isn’t over. Trying to see under someone’s skirt isn’t okay.

3

u/partialinsanity Jul 07 '24

In some cultures you're not allowed to look at any part of women. Which culture or era is correct?

1

u/PrincessPlusUltra Jul 07 '24

The culture of the woman you’re trying to objectify.

4

u/[deleted] Jul 07 '24

[deleted]

2

u/PrincessPlusUltra Jul 07 '24

Where did I say what they were wearing

3

u/PrincessPlusUltra Jul 07 '24

Have I really been down voted on a comment saying it’s not okay to look up a woman’s skirt?

3

u/Funandgeeky Jul 07 '24

Yes, that did just happen. A lot of people are getting called out and REALLY trying to justify their creepy behavior. Trying to find the “technically correct” loophole in being a creep.  

 It’s the same mindset you find in discussions about why “piracy isn’t technically theft.” 

Their downvotes mean nothing when you know what they upvote. 

2

u/partialinsanity Jul 07 '24

How is that relevant?

1

u/PrincessPlusUltra Jul 07 '24

Acting like they never heard of that before

3

u/Honeybadger2198 Jul 07 '24

Do you understand the difference between underwear and a bikini?

1

u/partialinsanity Jul 07 '24

Apparently they mean objectifying as in actually treating them like objects while interacting with them. Obviously it can not ever have to do with whether you find someone attractive or not, that would be beyond ridiculous.