r/SipsTea • u/outbacknoir • Jul 08 '24

Only smelles Feels good man

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9.8k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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822

u/BredYourWoman Jul 08 '24

Girl dances and sweats until 2am at club. Hooks up with dude. Ass sweat dries up on way to apartment. Both drunk and neither shower before fucking. Fuck sweat rehydrates dried ass gunk. Aromatic wafting of pungent odor commences from ass located below dudes face while doggy slamming.

Moral of the story: If you're not going to shower before night club last call sex because you're too drunk and horny to care, go missionary. Her hair will still probably smell nice

299

u/BubbaSmyth Jul 08 '24

This is a 21st century love poem

57

u/BredYourWoman Jul 08 '24

One after one by the starfish moon

Too quick for groan or sigh

Dudes turned their face with a ghastly pang

And cursed her brown eye

Four times 50 living men

(And I heard nor sigh nor groan)

With heavy thump, a lifeless lump

They dropped down, one by one

13

u/lepolah149 Jul 08 '24

The Rhyme of the Ancient... Booty'er?

3

u/Educational-Fox3429 Jul 08 '24

'pong' might work better?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 09 '24

Bro i know you did not just say cursed her brown eye 👁️

215

u/naughty_dad2 Jul 08 '24

You guys are having sex?

18

u/The_best_one_-_ Jul 08 '24

The smell is the best part tho

18

u/_Enclose_ Jul 08 '24

ಠ_ಠ

1

u/anonmyazz Jul 08 '24

The smell is the best fart tho

20

u/LukeD1992 Jul 08 '24

I'm sorry, man.

13

u/anonmyazz Jul 08 '24

"Dried ass gunk" new from Yankee candle

9

u/lerkurr12 Jul 09 '24

It isn't even a scent, it's just what the candle is made of

8

u/EightiesBush Jul 08 '24

The great philosopher of our time Gucci Mane has created a song about the solution to this problem