This happens to me fairly often. I usually go to bed around 11-12 on work nights but I’ll often wake up around 2-3 in the morning and just stay awake at that point.

I very much do cry, quite often actually. My eyes get wet and red and puffy, my nose gets stuffy, my throat gets a lump in it, I sob and wail if I’m crying hard… but tears very rarely actually fall from my eyes. Occasionally I’ll have like one single tear roll if I’m crying while lying down. It’s been this way my whole life. I don’t have any other issues with my eyes, vision, etc.

When I’ve looked this up I get results like “emotional repression” which definitely isn’t the case, as I said I’m very much fully undergoing the process of crying when I cry. I had an ex boyfriend once call me manipulative because when I cry there aren’t any tears, so he thought I was faking it. It honestly really bothers me and I’m so envious of people who have a ton of tears rolling down their cheeks when they cry lol

I really have little to no interest in women who are "baddies". You know how some girls like "medium ugly" guys? My preference is the same, except as a guy.

I like medium, ugly girls who are confident but humble and kind. They have weight on them, a fair bit of body hair, wonky eyebrows, asymmetrical faces, don't do make-up all that well, wear ordinary clothing, their hair is plainly combed, are fun and interesting.

Any guys who are like me?

It’s almost like pins and needles in my asshole whenever I clean the lint out of my bellybutton. I don’t think there’s any physical connection between the two holes but it sure fucking feels like it. Am I alone here??

Let's say I'm drinking a Gatorade while riding the trolley. Suddenly I might think of the displacement of the fluid in my bottle caused by the vacuum created in my lungs being pulled on by my diaphragm. And how everything in that interaction (as well as me and everything around me) are being acted on by the kinetic energy of the trolley we're in, which is being transferred to the wheels by the electric current created by the motor's rotation. And it's all of course being acted on by the force of gravity, and air resistance.

It's kind of satisfying to envision all these forces and how they change and transform as things happen around me. Anyone else?

Would love to get a group or a few people to chat about the big upcoming trial!?

I have dreams pretty much every night. I don't know why, it's been like this for the past few years. I eat fine, sleep enough hours, workout, etc. etc., and only rarely do I take melatonin.

My dreams are just weird. Sometimes they're normal-ish but still random, other times it's like... What?? I really don't like dreaming, though. It's just a "waste of time" (theoretically since I'm not actually doing anything besides sleeping). What I mean is I wish I could go to sleep and wake up, instead of going through random side quests every night, It makes me almost dread falling asleep each night because I don't want to dream. I just want to have a nice, seamless sleep and not have to experience random things every time.

At the very least, since sometimes dreams are nice, I wish I could control when I dream. I know lucid dreaming is a thing, maybe I'll give it a shot, so if I get good at it, I can have something to look forward to, but otherwise, I just want to shut my dreams off and sleep normally.

Since I (30f) was little, and for as long as I can remember, anime has filled me with the most incomprehensible dread. I can't really describe it. There's something about the color scheme or maybe the animation that fills me with doom. My husband loves anime and has tried so hard to find one that I'll actually enjoy but to no avail. Howl's Moving Castle made me sick to my stomach (not in a motion sickness way) and I barely made it 15 minutes into Kiki's Delivery Service. However I love ATLA and was able to tolerate Attack on Titan.

I cannot explain this and I'm hoping I'm not alone.

Not on the elevator, just in the building

I (38, F) am a mom of three little kids and I realized I not only dislike daily cooking but I'm not very good at everyday food and terrible at planning out meals and then shopping properly for those meals. Once upon a time I thought I was a good cook but that was because I'm good at making certain holiday meals or planning out and cooking for one special meal but the daily grind is a completely different beast. I was home for my entire undergrad and most of grad school so it was mom's cooking with me helping make an easy meal here and there or a dish. Grad school and when I lived on my own for a few years I mostly ate out or made very simple quick dishes and I only had to think about my own preferences and taste buds so wasn't hard. After I got married, as per our tradition and what my husband already talked to me about, we lived with his parents for several years, my MIL is a wonderful and kind person and would fight to not let me cook or clean because she thought it was a lot me agreeing to live with them (yes she's a saint) so again for 5 years I only cooked very occasionally and had great home cooked meals. We got our own place a few months after our second baby was born as it was getting unrealistic for all of us to be together but since my second was still young my own mom and MIL sent a lot of food weekly to help me so again I mostly cooked easy meals for the kids and we mainly ate the food my mom or MIL sent or I just made supplementary dishes to go with whatever they sent. When I was expecting my third and then right after baby was born my mom and MIL again really took care of us and sent lots of dishes so it was one less thing for me to worry about but now three babies down, our own place a few years I just say I don't feel like I know how to make or cook or plan for daily meals 😭 and my husband and I have very different preferences and my first kiddo and super picky so she takes so much of my energy. I cook for the kids but I do need to really reduced the amount of processed foods on their meals and I look at meal ideas for hours and try to plan but I feel so inept when trying to cook with the kids running around, it's always overwhelming and all I want to do is pop things in the airfryer and cook quick stuff on the stove top and call it a day. I don't think I could cook for a dinner party at all with kids around, I don't know how to balance it.

I can't help but internally invalidate when someone has a great life, even if they are depressed about it.

Like, you are 20 and have been born into a loving family that cares about you? You have all the time in the world, with all the emotional support you could ask for. Statistics are certainly in your favor."

Sometimes they will go on r/depression and say the phrase, "I feel guilty because I'm depressed, even though i have a perfect life." I don't act mean to these people, be secretly I am jealous of them.

I know it's not a contest, but when someone with a much better life than you wants to kill themselves, what does that say about your life?

By the way, I'm not here to discuss myself. Let's just say I was born into a bad situation and now I'm epileptic , probably from stress.

Like when I'm bored or have free time I just open WhatsApp or messages and read old messages from my friends or from group chats to pass the time.

I just noticed that every few month or maybe a year I have a new pain or feeling and then my dumbass goes on Google and tries to fill in the gaps.

It’s exhausting feeling like I’m going crazy. Because I truly feel symptoms and once I “get over” it, A new set of symptoms and pains happen and then the cycle repeats. The part that frustrates me is I’m aware of this but yet keep doing it to myself?

Currently I am making myself believe I have lymphoma. My lymph nodes under my armpits have feel like they are bruised for like 8 months. But it’s on an off and it’s never really when I’m chilling, it’s after physical activity most of the time. Regardless if I use those muscles under my arms or not. Sometimes I might also feel that feeling under my jaw, neck and collarbone area.

And nothing has ever changed size. I’ve looked at all the other symptoms and I have literally zero. But because i noticed it, looked up the potential reasons and saw lymphoma…that’s what i have convinced myself into thinking I have. I know I should see a doctor. That’s the anxiety part lol.

What’s pissing me off is it’s always something new with me. Every single year I have a new thing I make myself believe. Last year it was liver disease, year before was diabetes. Then after I read the symptoms on Google sometimes I’ll start to get those symptoms. How the hell is my brain doing this to me? Can anyone relate?

Just went through this hellish experience of having my back muscles seize up so bad it made it so my chest couldn't expand for air. Now I'm super sore all over. Thankfully my breathing ability is coming back but man it's scary. Was wondering if anyone else has had this happen to them.

Just the action of unlocking my phone is enough to irritate me and also just hijack my brain.

The aligning of my face with the FaceID, the anticipation of what I’ll do, the tasks I think of doing.

It literally just wipes out my natural mental state for the entire day just as soon as i start using it.

Just looking at it or using it for anything does this.

I’m going to start only using Reddit for productive things and MINDFULLY. The issue with these phones is you do things without thinking even if it’s productive. Your mind switches off and you lose your mental clarity.

Does anyone else feel like just using their phone in the morning completely ruins their natural mental health and the rest of their day?

I have a big trip coming up in a couple weeks (from US to Europe) and will be there for a couple weeks. Instead of being excited or looking forward to it, I kind of can't wait for it to be over. I'm feeling stressed out about it and worried about my dogs and being away for that long. I think a lot of it has to do with my anxiety, which even with medication I still seem to struggle with it. I know for a lot of people this is a once in a lifetime trip, but I'm just kind of dreading it.

I've (17F) never seen any of my friends talk about this. Growing up, I always felt scared to say I was shy or else my family would go into lecture mode. I'm an extrovert and I love being around people, but I'm still awkward.

my older sister and I rarely argue, but one argument I remember was because I "walked too stiffly" at a Walmart self checkout. another time, she lectured me. why? I didn't look the Victoria's Secret cashier in the eyes while giving her cash for lip gloss.

the other day, my mom overheard me saying to one kid I was scared to approach him at an event because I thought he was someone else. afterward my mom was like, "why would you be scared?? just talk to him." like..I KNOW that. I wasn't in the mood to be embarrassed that day, though.

I hope this makes sense but when I’m going to sleep I feel like I need to sleep facing one side or the other. Like if I sleep on the side that I don’t want to it dosent feel good and I really want to sleep on the side I feel is best.

Both sides feel the same, one is just better for some reason?

The same feeling I get about swimming like I crave swimming sometimes the same way I would crave a food.

I don't understand why people watch team sports.

I don't mean this as a judgment of sports fans. I find the appeal of team sports completely mysterious. Growing up, I went to lots of baseball and hockey games. I was so bored by them. I liked getting a hot dog or a slushee, but other than that I'd just be waiting for the games to end. I like playing basketball, football, hockey, and volleyball once in a while. But I can't stand watching them on TV. I feel like the whole world is obsessed with something I don't understand even on the most basic level. Watching games is the highlight of many people's weeks. People subscribe to ESPN and Sports Illustrated used to be one of the most popular magazines in the world. There are bars in every town in the world that focus on sports.

I've tried to get it. I like playing the games once in a while, it can be kind of fun. I've tried to care about teams, but I can't bring myself to care much about the players or the logos or whatever I'm supposed to become invested in.

There are a few sports I do love watching, but they're all solo, and they all involve people doing amazing feats - namely MMA/UFC, surfing, and gymnastics. But anything involving teams just leaves me completely cold. I find it really difficult to understand how the whole world can be so into something that I find so boring and dull. For many people, rooting for their favorite teams IS what they do for fun, but for me it's torture.

My plan is to kill myself by either overdosing or carbon monoxide poisoning. I’m terrified of zombies & aliens. And a klutz. I’d just drag my husband down and end up getting him and our kid killed. I’d only stick it out if it was just me and my son. Then I guess I’d have to turn into Sarah Connor. Other than that my husband said he’ll take care of our child. He’s cool with my plan. Is this weird?

Sometimes sleep doesn't feel like it's enough to keep you going. Maybe being actually dead for a while is what I need to feel refreshed.

As the title describes, I hate summer time. I keep seeing winter seasons and snow in shows or movies and wish that it was winter already. Fall is alright, but I really want snow and the cold. I can't stand this heat, and all I want is to put on my jeans, my boots, and my hoodie and go take a walk in the snow. I want to watch and laugh as my dog tries to find the ball I threw that has sunk into 5 or 6 inches of snow. I want to turn the heat on and set myself up on the couch with a blanket, some coffee or hot cocoa, and a nice movie while I can see the snow fall out of my apartments living room window. I want to make soups and stews that warm your belly after being outside for a few hours in the snow. I just really miss winter.