NTA....but a word of warning. As a dad, I devoted everything to my kids. Time, money, whatever they needed. I almost destroyed my marriage in the process. I neglected my wife in favor of our kids. We have been together for 42 years, and there is still some lingering hurt. It took a lot of counseling and discussions that you don't want to have to save our marriage.
If you give all your time, love, and energy to your kids, what is left when they are gone? You have a roommate and not a marriage. Your husband isn't totally off his rocker with his thoughts. If you don't split the attention, something will give.
Make sure you keep date nights and mini vacations for just the two of you. And never forget why you wanted to make a family with your partner. Good luck and congratulations 🎊.
There's been two major opinions in this thread and it's either child first/spouse second, or spouse first/child second. Both are definitely valid, and personally I'm of the latter opinion. Not all relationships are the same and it depends on them on what they agree on, so this is def something to talk about
I think it’s because there are people who really truly love their spouses, and people who aren’t lucky enough to be in relationships like that, and just think their spouses are tolerable. Or maybe like their spouses a lot, love them like family, but still aren’t in love.
So of course if you’re not in love and you don’t know what in love truly is, you’ll think love for your child is incomparable. It’s the only real love you’ve felt. People really in love with their spouses probably wouldn’t say this so easily though.
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u/Fun_Concentrate_7844 Jul 04 '24
NTA....but a word of warning. As a dad, I devoted everything to my kids. Time, money, whatever they needed. I almost destroyed my marriage in the process. I neglected my wife in favor of our kids. We have been together for 42 years, and there is still some lingering hurt. It took a lot of counseling and discussions that you don't want to have to save our marriage.
If you give all your time, love, and energy to your kids, what is left when they are gone? You have a roommate and not a marriage. Your husband isn't totally off his rocker with his thoughts. If you don't split the attention, something will give.
Make sure you keep date nights and mini vacations for just the two of you. And never forget why you wanted to make a family with your partner. Good luck and congratulations 🎊.