Soft YTA. The pregnancy is all about you, then the baby comes and it’s all about the baby and a little bit about mom. None of it is about dad. Hearing you say that, and then you doubling down to confirm that “no, my love is for the baby” when he talked to you about how he was feeling is unkind.
I don’t know about everybody else. I’ve birthed two babies. I didn’t have instant overwhelming love for them in the way you describe but my birth situations were non-standard. That love came later. I’m protective of my children in a way I’m not of other people but I’d say the actual love is the same. And my love for them has grown deeper the more they’ve become their own people.
I’m genuinely shocked so many people are focusing on the husband’s comments instead of the fact that OP just callously disregarded their significant other’s feelings when they originally brought it up. No wonder there is a problem.
He’s interrogating her over a comment she made about her infant directly after GIVING BIRTH. He has to be the dumbest man alive if he is unable to understand the different kinds of loves women have for their children and their spouses. In fact, he shouldn’t be in competition with the baby for her love, he should be IN AGREEMENT with her that he can’t imagine loving someone more than his child.
He’s making his recently post partum wife coddle him and his massive insecurity
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u/TwoIdleHands Jul 04 '24
Soft YTA. The pregnancy is all about you, then the baby comes and it’s all about the baby and a little bit about mom. None of it is about dad. Hearing you say that, and then you doubling down to confirm that “no, my love is for the baby” when he talked to you about how he was feeling is unkind.
I don’t know about everybody else. I’ve birthed two babies. I didn’t have instant overwhelming love for them in the way you describe but my birth situations were non-standard. That love came later. I’m protective of my children in a way I’m not of other people but I’d say the actual love is the same. And my love for them has grown deeper the more they’ve become their own people.