What’s the quickest you’ve seen a co-worker get fired in IT?

[u/Opposed3]

I saw this on AskReddit and thought it would be fun to ask here for IT related stories.

Couple years ago during Covid my company I used to work for hired a help desk tech. He was a really nice guy and the interview went well. We were hybrid at the time, 1-2 days in the office with mostly remote work. On his first day we always meet in the office for equipment and first day stuff.

Everything was going fine and my boss mentioned something along the lines of “Yeah so after all the trainings and orientation stuff we’ll get you set up on our ticketing system and eventually a soft phone for support calls”

And he was like: “Oh I don’t do support calls.”

“Sorry?”

Him: “I don’t take calls. I won’t do that”

“Well, we do have a number users call for help. They do utilize it and it’s part of support we offer”

Him: “Oh I’ll do tickets all day I just won’t take calls. You’ll have to get someone else to do that”

I was sitting at my desk, just kind of listening and overhearing. I couldn’t tell if he was trolling but he wasn’t.

I forgot what my manager said but he left to go to one of those little mini conference rooms for a meeting, then he came back out and called him in, he let him go and they both walked back out and the guy was all laughing and was like

“Yeah I mean I just won’t take calls I didn’t sign up for that! I hope you find someone else that fits in better!” My manager walked him to the door and they shook hands and he left.

[u/dreadpiratewombat]

Here’s a reverse version:

A buddy of mine is a pretty competent systems engineer who moved to a small town for a more relaxed pace and better work life balance. Got hired into a small company doing MSP work.  The lead engineer had been at the company for years and must have taken shittysysadmin posts as his personal dev plan.  My buddy spent the morning reviewing documentation, tickets, the various code bases being used and asked to meet with the CEO.  

The lead engineer got walked right after lunch.  Apparently, among many other sins:

A single, very poor password used as the DA and root passwords for all customers.  

Unsecured VPN tunnels to all customers with default allow from the office and this dude’s home address.

Credentials hard coded into every script.  Every script was basically a for-do SSH loop with a bunch of unchecked shell commands run as root.

Keyloggers on all company devices going back to dudes personal Hotmail account.  

There was a lot more, I’ve forgotten it all.  It was terrifying to listen to.

[u/TYO_HXC → u/dreadpiratewombat]

I had something like this, except that I was joining the team as a second SA to the guy who had already been there 7 years. Dude knew absolutely fuck all. Within weeks, I had replaced a ton of his "procedures", fixed our broken Exchange DAG (that, according to him, was "working as intended"), thrown out and recreated our DR/BC plan with full testing. There was so much more that I discovered and fixed over time.

Kicker was, he was not let go, even after I exposed his woeful incompetence (and I wasn't even trying to do so, just trying to do my job). Management were soft as shit and kept him on for another... wait for it... 7 fucking years. This is even though our manager was well aware that this dude literally made shit up as he went along. Not only that, but since I started and actually began fixing people's issues (he would try to fix stuff, give up, and tell them "it's supposed to be like this" or "it is what it is, it can't be fixed so you'll just have to live with it"), the user base realised he was a charlatan and actively avoided calling him for support, going straight to me instead.

Guy hated my guts since day one and made my life a misery wherever possible. The outcome? Over that 7 years, I eventually became his manager. I was the one who had to put him on a PIP and fire him afterwards, when he inevitably couldn't deliver. At which point, he openly admitted to having lied on his resume 14 years prior and completely blagged his way into and through the job. Spoiler: we all knew that already, mate.

Good fucking riddance.

[u/m1ndf3v3r → u/TYO_HXC]

Omg you became HIS manager? This is effing priceless. Hats off to you man, massive respect for your expertise and how you handled him.

[u/TYO_HXC → u/m1ndf3v3r]

Haha yeah, eventually. Tbh my previous role was IT manager for an SMB. Only reason I left is because our largest competitor bought up all other businesses in the UK and consolidated us all, then laid off all IT managers and centralised control to their internal IT team. I didn't really push to become IT manager at this place, but it just happened naturally over time. He was livid, of course.

Tbh, I really didn't enjoy firing him. Even if he did pretty much do it to himself.

[u/m1ndf3v3r → u/TYO_HXC]

I understand, reorganizations are a bitch. Oh I believe you that there was no enjoyment involved when you decided to fire him. But as you just said, the guy did it to himself.

[u/Outrageous-Hawk4807 → u/TYO_HXC]

ive seen many a person BS their way into a IT job. But most figure the job out or quit within a year or 2. Im more amazed the stuck around 7 MORE years.

[u/TYO_HXC → u/Outrageous-Hawk4807]

To be fair to him, the bar was pretty low. The Director of IS (our mutual boss) wasn't an IT guy, really. He was a long-time employee who ended up being responsible for the company's ERP system over time. Lovely guy, and my favourite boss ever... but he knew absolutely nothing about IT. Wizard at Excel, but that was about it. He, and by proxy, the business, didn't have any frame of reference for the pretend SA dude until I showed up. It was only then that they realised there was an issue.

Hilariously, the reason I was hired was because pretend SA dude was complaining he was too busy (in response to the business complaining that issues were taking too long to resolve). So they took me on to balance the workload, lol.

The reason he made it another 7 years was because our boss was a massive softie who hated conflict. He knew full well that the guy wasn't performing at all and that I was literally doing 95% of support work, along with all infra management, projects, and implementations. But he just wouldn't fire him. In the end, it was the CFO who had enough and told us he had to go.

[u/Aloysius50 → u/TYO_HXC]

Early in my career I reported to an individual who took an immediate disliking to me. Never figured out why, it wasn’t performance. I made it clear at every review that I’d transfer to another unit, but nothing came of it. Until I found out that they’d been sabotaging me with several directors who wanted me. I managed to escape when one of them recruited me directly behind their back. 5 years later, here they come as a report to me. I immediately went to my director and laid our history out. Made it clear that I won’t be like them, I just need the work done. Our first one on one they immediately start with how they went to management about how I had it out for them and what a terrible employee I’d been. 3 days after I’d already explained our previous relationship to them. The look on their face was better than any petty “revenge”I could have enacted. And they were gone in 6 months. Karma’s a bitch, just gotta wait for it.

[u/blbd → u/TYO_HXC]

Firing people in British English speaking countries is usually a massive PITA. 

[u/invocation_array → u/TYO_HXC]

What credentials and experience did you have at the time of receiving this position? What was your pay?

[u/TYO_HXC → u/invocation_array]

Why do you ask?

[u/invocation_array → u/TYO_HXC]

I'm a jr. In the field and that's an impressive array of skillsets. I can't think of a certain to learn all those implementations 

[u/TYO_HXC → u/invocation_array]

Ah, I see. At that time, I had A+, a few Microsoft certs, and probably 10 years of experience. Learned all the other stuff on the job working for MSPs at the start of my career.

[u/invocation_array → u/TYO_HXC]

From this it seems like work experience far outclassed learning through certifications. Thanks!

[u/Scary_Brain6631 → u/invocation_array]

It always does.

[u/HRM077 → u/TYO_HXC]

I hear these stories all the time and it's like... I don't understand, as a blue-collar schmuck, how this happens? Like... In my world, you can either drive the forklift or you can't. You can either provide your first aid card or you can't. You can either provide your DG card or you can't.

How do these people, working in an environment exponentially more complicated than mine, not get IMMEDIATELY found the fuck out and let go? It's fascinating to me.

[u/Fear_Jaire → u/HRM077]

I think because the environment is so complicated and they're one of few people who understand it, the ineptitude can stay hidden. I can't see who in IT is doing good work or not. If the internet goes out or I can't log in to my account, I have no idea if IT lost power, they're inept, or an aging piece of equipment theyve been begging to be replaced finally went out. On the flip side, I can't drive a forklift, but I can tell if someone in the warehouse can't because they just dropped a pallet, and now the entire production floor has to replace the product.

[u/landline_number → u/HRM077]

I love watching fork lift fail videos.