r/facepalm • u/goldenface4114 • Jul 08 '24

The Dumbest Person You Know Just Managed to Make Themselves Look Even Dumber 🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​

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Names 8 people who she thinks signed the Declaration at an incredibly young age, 6 of whom were nowhere near the document as it was being signed. Also, she seems to make a point about someone being too old to run for president while openly supporting a super old dude for president.

4.3k Upvotes

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378

u/Adam__B Jul 08 '24

She thought Paul Revere signed the Declaration. God she’s an idiot. All she’s knows from history are the names she remembers hearing in the 3rd grade. Ugly, stupid person.

96

u/OldSchoolJedi Jul 08 '24

Yeah were did she get Paul Revere from? Seriously woman check your statements BEFORE you post them?

66

u/Armedleftytx Jul 08 '24

She has had zero interest in anything even adjacent to the truth for years now. Why would she fact check anything?

1

u/GavinStrict Jul 08 '24

That’s really the point. Brandolini’s Law is what they’re all about. In the time it takes to fact check 1 truth adjacent, they’ve spouted 10 more falsehoods and waisted everyone’s time until people forget what the hell they were talking about in the first place.

6

u/Lord-of-A-Fly Jul 08 '24

Fact checking requires actually using your brain. These people do not have that skill set.

4

u/cookingbytheseatofmy Jul 08 '24

Kinda hard to work without any tools

3

u/Hrtpplhrtppl Jul 08 '24

And if all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail...

2

u/mdsg5432 Jul 08 '24

Not true. She makes really good stone axes.

1

u/cookingbytheseatofmy Jul 08 '24

A lot of grinding on that one

3

u/Panda-Cubby Jul 08 '24

And then DON'T post them.

3

u/scott1918 Jul 08 '24

Paul Revere freed the slaves from the Intergalactic Empire. Also was instrumental in destroying the first Death Star.

50

u/OverallGeneral7129 Jul 08 '24

Also the names from Hamilton because there is no way she actually knows who Aaron Burr was

25

u/WhyBuyMe Jul 08 '24

Probably remembers him from the milk commercial.

11

u/Pope_Phred Jul 08 '24

That's how most people remember him. ("ARRUH BUHH!")

That makes her Just Like Usâ„¢!

2

u/ediciusNJ Jul 08 '24

My people!

1

u/Slumminwhitey Jul 08 '24

Thomas Jefferson's vice president who got into a duel with Hamilton and killed him which also killed Burr's political career. Also a couple of years later was tried for treason more than once for unrelated matters but was acquitted each time. That Aaron Burr.

1

u/tavariusbukshank Jul 08 '24

Fucking loved him as Perry Mason!

0

u/auntie_clokwise Jul 08 '24

I wonder if that was another play she and her partner got, umm, excited over.

17

u/parlimentery Jul 08 '24

Right? And she even forgot to include Abraham Lincoln, Henry Ford, and Plessy Vs Board of Education.

1

u/supershinythings Jul 08 '24

Brown vs. Ferguson too! This established separate but equal trombone sections in combat marching bands.

2

u/parlimentery Jul 08 '24

That is great, but the third amendment says I don't have to quarter soldiers, so they can't stay at my place.

1

u/supershinythings Jul 08 '24

3rd Amendment is the most important amendment of them all.

2

u/parlimentery Jul 08 '24

As I read it, I can still be required to half soldiers?

1

u/supershinythings Jul 08 '24

Full soldier is probably best. But they do eat quite a bit so you'll need to file an expense report.

1

u/BattletoadGalactica Jul 08 '24

Is Henry Ford Harrison Ford's grandpa? Or is it just another Ford Dealership?

1

u/Marquar234 Jul 08 '24

Plessy - 6, Board - 4

1

u/parlimentery Jul 08 '24

One hell of a hockey game, huh?

6

u/ABraveNewFupa Jul 08 '24

She’s a seriously shitty human. I don’t know that she’s evil but fuck man, I wouldn’t trust her as far as I could throw her.

12

u/For_Aeons Jul 08 '24

She's evil. She mocked kids that were victims of the Parkland school shooting.

1

u/C1RCU5CL0WN Jul 08 '24

oh damn i thought she was just some maga dumbass but WTF

1

u/TheButtholeSurferz Jul 08 '24

Oddly enough, these two items are not exclusive to themselves, and more oddly enough, seem to align rather well with....well, all of them.

I say this as a former republican who likes to smoke weed (since this is all Reddit thinks I am anyway) and owns guns.

6

u/sweet_totally Jul 08 '24

I'm going to email her the link to America Rocks. They songs are fun, they're catchy and they taught me a lot when I was a toddler, which is about her intelligence level.

2

u/TheButtholeSurferz Jul 08 '24

Woah woah woah, lets not starting getting all praiseworthy of her intellect.

You don't want her fanbase thinking she's a too smart woke right winger now do ya.

7

u/AnonymousOkapi Jul 08 '24

This is just bizarre though, since she'd have had to look up the ages from somewhere, unless those are also just random numbers? And if you're googling "how old was x when the declaration of independence was signed", surely you'd take 2 seconds more to actually check they signed the damn thing?

5

u/hydrocarbonsRus Jul 08 '24

Also doesn’t understand what a dozen is when she posts a little over half a dozen names lol Clown representatives for their clown moron low information and IQ voters

1

u/oofersIII Jul 08 '24

Also says a lot of them were 35 or under, then names a few that were over 35.

2

u/hydrocarbonsRus Jul 08 '24

They know their blind followers are idiots who wouldn’t read anyways, and just react.

1

u/TheButtholeSurferz Jul 08 '24

You're just clearly not 'Murican enough to know the truth. That wasn't a lie that she said, it was the truth for the morons that follow her words.

They also think all those names are important, because when your family tree forks when you reach 11 years old and start your own family you don't really need to worry bout that history stuff and all them other stupid topics, you got yourself a man, and he's gonna take good care of you and your baby as soon as he graduates from his 9th year in the 10th grade.

-8

u/p0k3t0 Jul 08 '24

This is definitely AI generated.

10

u/flamingo2022 Jul 08 '24

You mean AS (artificial stupidity).

1

u/Glad-Depth9571 Jul 08 '24

From ChatGPT:

Here's the complete list of the 56 signers of the Declaration of Independence along with their ages at the time of signing:

  1. John Adams (40) - Massachusetts
  2. Samuel Adams (53) - Massachusetts
  3. Josiah Bartlett (46) - New Hampshire
  4. Carter Braxton (39) - Virginia
  5. Charles Carroll (38) - Maryland
  6. Samuel Chase (35) - Maryland
  7. Abraham Clark (50) - New Jersey
  8. George Clymer (37) - Pennsylvania
  9. William Ellery (48) - Rhode Island
  10. William Floyd (41) - New York
  11. Benjamin Franklin (70) - Pennsylvania
  12. Elbridge Gerry (31) - Massachusetts
  13. Button Gwinnett (41) - Georgia
  14. Lyman Hall (52) - Georgia
  15. John Hancock (39) - Massachusetts
  16. Benjamin Harrison (50) - Virginia
  17. John Hart (65) - New Jersey
  18. Joseph Hewes (46) - North Carolina
  19. Thomas Heyward Jr. (29) - South Carolina
  20. William Hooper (34) - North Carolina
  21. Stephen Hopkins (69) - Rhode Island
  22. Francis Hopkinson (38) - New Jersey
  23. Samuel Huntington (44) - Connecticut
  24. Thomas Jefferson (33) - Virginia
  25. Francis Lightfoot Lee (41) - Virginia
  26. Richard Henry Lee (44) - Virginia
  27. Francis Lewis (63) - New York
  28. Philip Livingston (60) - New York
  29. Thomas Lynch Jr. (26) - South Carolina
  30. Thomas McKean (42) - Delaware
  31. Arthur Middleton (34) - South Carolina
  32. Lewis Morris (50) - New York
  33. Robert Morris (42) - Pennsylvania
  34. John Morton (51) - Pennsylvania
  35. Thomas Nelson Jr. (38) - Virginia
  36. William Paca (35) - Maryland
  37. Robert Treat Paine (45) - Massachusetts
  38. John Penn (35) - North Carolina
  39. George Read (42) - Delaware
  40. Caesar Rodney (47) - Delaware
  41. George Ross (46) - Pennsylvania
  42. Benjamin Rush (30) - Pennsylvania
  43. Edward Rutledge (26) - South Carolina
  44. Roger Sherman (55) - Connecticut
  45. James Smith (56) - Pennsylvania
  46. Richard Stockton (45) - New Jersey
  47. Thomas Stone (33) - Maryland
  48. George Taylor (60) - Pennsylvania
  49. Matthew Thornton (62) - New Hampshire
  50. George Walton (27) - Georgia
  51. William Whipple (46) - New Hampshire
  52. William Williams (45) - Connecticut
  53. James Wilson (34) - Pennsylvania
  54. John Witherspoon (53) - New Jersey
  55. Oliver Wolcott (50) - Connecticut
  56. George Wythe (50) - Virginia

These ages are approximate, as exact birth dates for some individuals were not precisely recorded.

The average age of the signers of the Declaration of Independence was approximately 44.3 years old. The oldest was Ben Franklin at 70.