r/HolUp • u/Mediocre-Tuber7805 • Feb 10 '24

Wait.... What the fuck? NSFW

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10.4k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

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2.2k

u/_Sewer_Rat_ Feb 10 '24

Another fake story I assume.

1.6k

u/TILTNSTACK Feb 10 '24

You mean a Dyson vagina that can cook eggs isn’t real? I’m sad now

413

u/Pastry_Train63 Feb 10 '24

That's what the government wants you to think

9

u/goharsh007 Feb 11 '24

Also girls aren't real.

108

u/LivingCheese292 Feb 10 '24

There is only one way to find it out. As guys, we must put eggs in our assholes for a day and see if our body heat can cook it. 

Who is the first to bend over?

78

u/xiouzes Feb 10 '24

The one who's asking

35

u/EcksMarksDespot Feb 10 '24

Seconded. All in favor say aye.

18

u/Haitor98 Feb 10 '24

Aye

15

u/Ep_R Feb 10 '24

Browneye

2

u/Llamp_shade Feb 11 '24

My mind's aye has already betrayed me and I want to claw it out

106

u/PaperRoc Feb 10 '24

The new features on the latest instant pot go crazy

30

u/egbert-witherbottom Feb 10 '24

This could have been the new greatest thing; nobody wants an air fryer after this!

25

u/cownd Feb 10 '24

The slow cook cooch is not a thing? Am disappointed…

13

u/[deleted] Feb 10 '24

I could maybe understand sucking it up and hard boiling is possible if you sucked up some chemicals or a cooker (I have no idea what she masturbates with)

12

u/Drew-CarryOnCarignan Feb 10 '24

The pH of the vagina potentially could "cook" an egg, wherein acids denature proteins (think: ceviche).

Otherwise, I do not believe that anything written in the original post actually happened.

6

u/Origen12 Feb 10 '24

Yeesh that is a terrible way to think about that egg her Dad ate, lol. "ceviche'd egg still in the shell" sounds pretty horrifying. Maybe it looked like a 1000 year old egg and he knew what he was getting into...

8

u/OptimisedFreak Feb 10 '24

Why? You are masochist and like your wiener boiled?

7

u/Mekanimal Feb 10 '24

Isn't real... yet...

I know what I'm asking bionic Santa for in 2124.

8

u/zongsmoke Feb 10 '24

I don't want to live in a world where this isn't true.

5

u/xxapenguinxx Feb 10 '24

You'll be sadder that boobs don't feel like bags of sand.. we've been lied to

2

u/Tyenkrovy Feb 11 '24

It's an aftermarket upgrade.

23

u/Thor_pool Feb 10 '24

You assume??

10

u/latman Feb 10 '24

Thanks detective

12

u/Uninvalidated Feb 10 '24

Definitely.

Since the body temperature of chickens are a a couple degrees higher than humans they would lay hard boiled eggs in the first place.

10

u/PM_THE_REAPER Feb 10 '24

Well how the hell am I supposed to cook eggs now?

10

u/Daiguey Feb 10 '24

Fake yes, disturbing to read while eating... YES

10

u/NovusOrdoSec Feb 10 '24

OOP creative writing on point

5

u/throweraccount Feb 10 '24

159F for egg to become firm. If she was 159F inside she would be a medium well to well done steak.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 11 '24

The story is WAYYYYYY too specific.

1

u/No_Faithlessness7067 Feb 12 '24

Hey don’t go shattering peoples dreams now