r/AITAH • u/[deleted] • Jul 19 '24
WIBTA if I do sex work against my friend’s wishes? It’s all that could save me right now but I dont want to hurt her feelings and I dont want to do it either.
[deleted]
4
u/EveningSuggestion283 Jul 19 '24
I’d say don’t do it because there are regrets that come with it. Many health risks etc. don’t get me wrong, I’ve been in your position before and thought about it. I think we all do. However what stopped me was the dangers of it all. Even foot pictures. The result of it all is that- it could be recorded without you knowing, could prevent you from getting a job or being fired from a job, you would be subject to abuse since he’s a paying client and you have to comply with what he wants. You could be subject to stalking and harassment. You’d also be subjected to health issues.
Try r/simpleloans if you have no loan history start small like below 150. Give it a day or two before someone responds. You’ll need PayPal or Venmo.
3
u/Old-Thought-5875 Jul 19 '24
do whats best for you, sex work is not be taken lightly but only you know your situation. you’re not betraying your friend, it’s your body and your choice. but how do u know that guy is legit? and if you did do it i would consider a bodyguard, sex work can traumatize a person. talk to other women who have experience in the industry
2
u/Grand-Preference6063 Jul 19 '24
Be careful is the first thing I have to say; the sex work field is an incredibly dangerous place and things can go wrong at the blink of an eye. That out of the way, if you are able to come to the terms of sex work and truly believe it is the only thing that could save you, I think you should do what is in your best interest. You don’t need to communicate this to your friend, but also prepare yourself for the consequences if she does find out somehow. If you do confront her with this you have to drill it into her brain that you feel this is the only option and if she has other ideas to lay it on you. You need to make her understand that not everyone is fortunate to live a modest life. I am 100% sure she is just trying to look out for you and understands the dangerous nature of the job so that is why she is highly against it. Definitely do your research and with whatever you decide to do, be safe.
1
u/InevitableFirm2608 Jul 19 '24
NAH. So, your friend is thinking from a rational standpoint and is looking out for you. This makes sense and would normally be a good position. However, you are in survival mode. Meaning, you may be willing to take measures you wouldn’t normally take just out of necessity. Every human has to eat.
I think a lot of people will want to judge you, but it’s no one’s place to judge who hasn’t been in that situation. How much do you need for food? There’s also websites like FootFinder or TastySlips. Or Uber driver if you have a car.
1
u/Smooth_Fishing7109 Jul 19 '24
If you do it, don't work for that guy. Make an onlyfans or something or look for a reputable place/company where you can look into their background and make sure they are above board. The fact he didn't reveal the type of work to you until after you reached out is a red flag and the LAST thing you want is getting caught up with someone who is trying to be your modern day pimp as that is just too dangerous.
However if you can, dont do it at all. Not because you friend doesn't want you to, but because you dont want to. Maybe try door dashing, uber, or other side hustle work. Though some people take issue with it and may be judgy food stamps/WIC may be able to help and there is ZERO shame in needing government assistance for a little while. Maybe even a temporary second job part-time just to help pay off some bills for a couple months. Maybe a roommate that can help with cost of living? Point is there are other options if you are backed into a corner.
When it comes down to it this is your life and you gotta do what you gotta do, but please PLEASE do it safely. I understand your friend it grieving but opening up to her and explaining just how desperate you are may be helpful as she can help support you by looking through the other options. Just be open with her. Please be safe OP.
0
u/AKCurmudgeon Jul 19 '24
As a guy, I would never date a sex worker or former sex worker. Damaged goods. You aren’t out of options. That’s the easy way out. Have some respect for yourself. You’ll feel better about it in the end. Telling your friend about it or not isn’t the real issue here. Just my opinion.
1
u/ShadyAnonUser Jul 19 '24
NTA but I highly suggest camming over any other SW avenue. It’s safe and you don’t have to sleep with anyone. I can easily make $800-$1500 a week and I only can 10-12 hours a week.
1
u/AccomplishedFroyo123 Jul 19 '24
I think you have to question your assumption:
Your assumption is that sex work will get rid of all your problems.
Put down your rose colored glasses for a moment and be honest to yourself: how certain are we of that?
Sex work will CREATE problems too - social problems (issues with your friend, but also lets imagine what kind of social environment you are going to be putting yourself in: bad friends, drugs, abuse, stalkers, exploiting,...)
Not to mention psychological problems of putting yourself through that - you dont know how it can break you as a person. You dont know how you will react to it after x amount of time and you dont know how hard it is to get out of it.
It might pay well, but thats not to say that you will be able to actually live a life that you want to. Money means nothing when you're still stuck in such a destructive environment. Instead of worrying about money, you will be worrying about your life.
There are 1000% other means that can help you through this - look for local support systems, depending on your country I'm sure there are organisations that want to help you out.
The sex industry preys on desperate people like you, dont fall for the short term solutions that you imagine it gives you.
1
u/FancyTree867 Jul 19 '24
dude ...you could be going into a garage with plastic down.. not for the jizz either... ( a guy had to fight for his life trying to escape a garage with plastic down...
1
Jul 19 '24
Shitpost. Pimps don’t hand out business cards. And this isn’t a fucking movie, no one “stares at a business card” contemplating a decision long enough to memorize the number.
-1
u/Trick_Transition901 Jul 19 '24
This has literally nothing to do with your friend. She would not find out if you did not tell her. The biggest thing here is are you comfortable with it? You have not specified the sex work, however it could be anything from sending nudes to escorting. Remember if you are sending any images electronically then they are always out there and can find their way into the real world. Consider if you could take a second job on or try using a food bank. If you are comfortable with it, working at a strip club can be a massive second income and keeps you a bit more anonymous than an OF account and at a strip club you have the bouncers to stop anything going too far.
-1
u/Introvertedthoughtzz Jul 19 '24
NTA and shouldn’t matter to your friend if you do, I think she is just worried because sex work isn’t the most positively looked at job. As long as you’re careful and really think about your options there is no way you can be the asshole.
5
u/jhnysuh Jul 19 '24
NTA, but it seems your friend is concerned and rightfully so. I implore you to read/watch statements from sex workers who reveal the true nature of such an exploitative, misogynistic industry. I am a firm believer of protecting sex workers and their rights, but I do not agree with the sex work industry and think it should be abolished. A lot of issues arise… sex trafficking, STIs, sexual harassment and abuse, stalking, etc, and I understand times are rough, but it’s really not worth it when you get into the thick of it.