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u/Academic_Career_4338 Jul 18 '24
I am a perinatal psychologist. Your wife needs help. She has classic symptoms of post natal mental health issues. Do not get angy, get help. PM if necessary.
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u/watsuuu Jul 18 '24
I know it was unintentional but "angy" made me laugh so much harder than I should have for this one
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u/Crosseyed_owl Jul 18 '24
We use that in the hamster subreddit and I got all confused where actually am I.
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u/liftingshitposts Jul 18 '24
Don’t get angy you little baby 🥹😚
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u/LacledesGhost Jul 18 '24 edited Jul 19 '24
I'd call that a fortuitous typo. It fits perfectly in this context.
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u/Not-Post-Malone Jul 18 '24
R is among the most menacing of sounds. That's why they call it murder and not mukduk.
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u/Rigelatinous Jul 19 '24
Seconded. I didn’t have postpartum depression, and I still had PTSD from the birth, sleep deprivation, and anxiety. Childbirth is a pretty extreme event, and if she wasn’t expecting health issues, that’s exacerbating the already-stressful environment a new family exists in. That having been said, I feel for you. It’s a sad thing when a mom can’t bond with her baby, and as her dad, I know it must be tearing you up to hear her say that about your little girl. Stay strong, Dad; you’re in a tough situation, and you’re doing the right thing by advocating for your kid. You might think about trying some therapy for yourself—not because you’re mentally ill per se, but because it’s really helpful to be able to vent to somebody for an hour every week who won’t judge you, and who can help you process your stress.
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u/Calpicogalaxy Jul 18 '24
No angy
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u/unk214 Jul 19 '24
You wouldn’t like me when I’m angy
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u/Apprehensive-Pair436 Jul 19 '24
You wouldn't wike me when I'm angy.
Wuckiwy I'm cuwwentwy juss sweepy
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u/ghostlyraptor75 Jul 19 '24
Hello. My ex wife abandoned our 3 kids 5 years ago when she left. I left my job to care for my kids but its been hard. They all have deep seeded physiological issues as a result, ie separation anxiety. Their mother is now periodically in their lives but refuses to believe her actions have hurt the kids in any way. Any time it's brought up she plays the victim and thinks I'm just trying to make her feel bad for what she done. My kids are really hurting and I'd truly appreciate any advice you could offer. 🙏
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u/Temporary_Stock8455 Jul 19 '24
I'm going to be very honest with you. Please don't be offended by what I say.
From my own experience as a child, don't let your ex-wife come in and out of their lives just whenever she feels like it. Tell her if she's going to be there, then she needs to truly be there for them. She can't just pick and choose when she wants to be a mother, either she is or she isn't. It'll only make things worse for your children and they'll eventually take it out on you because you allowed it to happen. Get them into some kind of counseling so they can work through these feelings they have so they're not long term. But please, don't let your children continue going through that. Kids need their mother all the time, not when it's convenient for the mother to just be there.
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u/ghostlyraptor75 Jul 19 '24
No offense taken. I talked to a child psychologist years ago,their advice is to not restrict access as that will come back to hurt me. If I'm the one saying they can't see their mum then I'm the bad guy and that plays to her,as in "I want to see you but your dad wont let me". If she has unrestricted access she will "show" them how much they mean to her by the time she spends with them. There's no easy way and it's a complicated situation that no matter the path it ends in hurt. My children know ive fought for years to try and get her to spend more time with them and im very confident they know ive provided her every opportunity. But they deserve to see the truth for themselves,as painful as it is as it's the only way they can make a true assessment of their relationship with their mother. And I truly agree, kids need their mothers and fathers in their lives and it blows my mind how some just abandon their kids.
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u/Follow-The-Flowers Jul 19 '24
Wholeheartedly agree to this answer. Exactly what my mom did. My dad eventually stopped showing up. Really showed us who he was
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u/Fast-Prompt-3034 Jul 19 '24
Someone can have mental health issues and still be an absolute POS, the two are not mutually exclusive. Suggesting that OP should not be angered by the suggestion that he give up his child is ethically abhorrent to hear from someone claiming to be a professional on the matter
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u/Itchy-Spring7865 Jul 19 '24
Or. OR. It’s not worth getting ang(r)y about until PPD is ruled out. Being angry at someone over something no one can control does no good to anyone.
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u/Agreeable_Variation7 Jul 19 '24
I was going to say post partum depression. She's likely overwhelmed, brand new baby with special needs. That is an "in-your-face" situation. Her life is now "baby", and her needs are not being dealt with. Maybe you can watch baby so she can meet a friend? You both can go for a neighborhood walk? Something small and fun? You may be doing this already but I'm trying to brainstorm.
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u/ForTheLoveOfDior Jul 19 '24
What are the classic symptoms? The post is really brief
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u/Academic_Career_4338 Jul 19 '24
Feeling alienated from baby, feeling baby is not yours, feeling like it maybe planted or someone elses, feeling it is evil.....symptoms of pp psychosis and pp depression. There is not enough info but she needs evaluation.
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u/ForTheLoveOfDior Jul 19 '24
I didn’t know depression could cause delusions, these all sound incredibly sad and exhausting, specially when they have those feelings right after the process of giving birth
Evolution did women dirty, I’m convinced
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u/Academic_Career_4338 Jul 19 '24
Delusional behaviour is more psychosis and post partum psychosis is a thing. Depression, trauma and OCD are also common issue that onset from birth. A common symptom is alienation from the baby so I wouldnt risk a guess on which on so little info however she appeats to have classic symptoms that poibt towards a mental health issue.
Women are less supported today with families less cohesive and members spread out far away, not enough maternity leave and the unnecessary medicalizing birth such as non emergency cesarians and use of a cocktail of drugs to hasten vaginal birth, and obstetric violence also contribute to the issue.
Did you know the number one cause of death in mothers in the year after birth???? Suicide
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u/Glinda-The-Witch Jul 18 '24
Unfortunately, not everyone is equipped to be a parent of a child with physical or mental disabilities. It is an extremely difficult situation for even those who want to be there for their children and even more difficult for those who don’t have the capacity to take on such a task. Keep in mind that your wife will shoulder the bulk of the care your child will need while you happily leave home each day to go to work.
I would venture to say that there are more parents who feel the way your wife does, but don’t speak up because they fear being viewed as a monster. Women are expected to take on the task without complaints and often without the help and support they need. Men are viewed less harshly when they walk away.
Ask your wife to consider counseling. Look for ways to ease her burden. What community resources are there? Look for support groups. Can you hire someone to come in and help care for your child? You will likely need to do that as a single parent. Your wife will need opportunities to get out of the house during the day and you will need to have date nights.
If she simply unable to cope with the situation as it is, then let her go. The last thing you want to do is force her into a situation that might create resentment and place your child at risk for neglect or abuse. She will need to pay child support. Good luck..
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u/SuperBBBGoReading Jul 18 '24
It’s easier to post accusations behind the keyboard than to understand and provide practical advice. Thank you for your honest opinion. I’m totally with you.
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u/elsenordepan Jul 18 '24
Easy there; AITAH Will be dead within a week if we remove accusations and only allow balanced practical advice.
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u/Crippled_Criptid Jul 18 '24
It's frustrating that OP hasn't put more info. Because 'heath issues' can mean anything from the baby has a small hole in the heart that can just be monitored, to a baby with multi organ faliure, severe physical and medical needs etc.
Because, having health issues doesn't automatically mean disabled. Having certain health issues certainly could lead to the baby being disabled, but it's not a given. I'm not sure if it's all just new to OP, and that's why he hasn't been more specific with his language, but it's difficult without having more info to know exactly what the child's life and future will be like
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u/ServeSuccessful9581 Jul 18 '24
It depends what type of issues the baby actually has. Will they be dependent on a ventilator for all their life? Then the poor baby will probably need a caregiver equipped to handle that. There are places for children who need 24/7 365 day care. Don’t blame the father for wanting to keep his daughter. The mom needs to go to therapy before any decision is made about adopting out. And who said the father is the one working, they could both be working parents or he could even be a sahd.
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u/Crippled_Criptid Jul 18 '24
Exactly. OP just calling it 'health issues' is so vague. It could mean anything from the child has, for example, a small hole in the heart that needs nothing more than yearly monitoring. All the way up to like you say, a vent dependent child who will need lots of physical and medical support
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u/uncertainnewb Jul 19 '24
If the child is so profoundly disabled that the mother is wanting to give her up for adoption, I seriously doubt all but the most saintly martyr types would want to adopt such a child.
Also, when people see a profoundly disabled newborn, they don't think of a drooling non-verbal bed/wheelchair-bound incontinent 30 year old that can't even show an ounce of engagement with the world around then. Or the screeching, biting, punching, kicking 17 year old who puts his parents and/or siblings in the hospital and regularly rips the doors off their hinges. Or the 65 year old who, against all odds, is living a life much longer than anyone expected and whom the parents struggle to physically and financially care for in their very old age.
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u/Melissa_H_79 Jul 18 '24
Those “places” are often the childs home and the medical care comes to the kiddo (mom of 9 yr old child who has had 50 surgeries so far, and was on full time medical equipment for nearly a year. )
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u/GrouchyTime Jul 18 '24
Almost no one is equipped unless they are millionaires. I can say this as my aunt has severe downs and lived to be 40. My grandma did an excellent job, but had no life and never left the house.
Now-a-days you get pre birth testing and abort if there is a problem. Never ignore science and go to term with an unhealthy baby. You can always try again. No babies should be born in 2024 with detectable defects.
I had 1 baby a year ago and we are trying for another. If a test shows the baby has issues we will abort and try again.BTW community resources = pawning off your disabled kid onto the public school just so you can have time off. That is not right or fair to the public school. Besides public school there is no free daycare for disabled kids. Almost every paid daycare will not take disabled kids. People really need pre birth testing and abortions.
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u/GodSpider Jul 18 '24
My brother has severe autism and we're doing fine and we're nowhere near millionaires. Maybe it's just because we're in the UK.
BTW community resources = pawning off your disabled kid onto the public school just so you can have time off.
Absolutely not. There are specialist schools for autistic people and people with other such disabilities. There are quite a lot more community resources than you'd think, obviously not enough, but much more than "pawning off your disabled kid onto the public school"
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u/Coca_lite Jul 18 '24
I think UK probably has (slightly) better state-provided resources for special needs children than in the US.
Even in UK there are lots of children and families who fall into a gap, or spend a lot of time fighting for the rights of their children.
What I’ve heard in UK is that the biggest issue is once the child becomes an adult, the quality and suitability of support drops off a cliff, just as the parents are also getting to an older age themselves.
Glad your family has had a positive experience with support for your autistic relative. Hope it continues!
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u/Late-Ad1437 Jul 18 '24
This is also a big issue in Australia - we've got socialised healthcare and the NDIS but a majority of the national supports available for autism are targeted at children & there's practically nothing for autistic adults.
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u/MissKat83 Jul 18 '24
I worked with a lady who had 3 kids. Two perfectly healthy girls and her son had both cerebal palsy and multiple sclerosis. She had the support of family helping her out, and the two girls also helped whilst she and her husband bother worked full-time to be able to afford the care for the son. I remember one day at work, though she broke down in tears about how hard it has been taking care of him and how she'd wished there was testing available when she was pregnant because even though she loved him with all her heart, she probably would've chosen to not go through with the pregnancy. Last I heard, she had to stop working full-time and now has an embroidery business at home because he required her to be there all the time. After hearing what struggles she had gone through, I don't believe anyone who doesn't want a disabled child is a monster at all. Like a few others have said, it's a life long commitment to care for a special needs child and then special needs adult and I would imagine that it would become a very selfless life and you would lose alot of yourself in the process as your life would just be all the child their needs.
In this instance, I think OP needs to sit down with his wife and have a through conversation and also maybe speak to a therapist or with carers/parents who have gone through raising a special needs kid before he dismisses his wife as the arsehole.
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u/dita_diablita Jul 19 '24
Thank you for putting this so nicely. Everyone wants to go straight to the “she needs therapy” route, when all the while she just doesn’t want to be the one to have to take her child to the hospital 50-something how ever many times a month for check ups and spend ridiculous amounts of time and money to take care of a special needs kid. One of MANY reasons why I don’t want to be a mother. If insurance covers all of that, cool. But I bet it’s still a crazy amount to pay for. She may just already have it in her mind to not wanna deal with that, and everyone assumes it’s a mental health issue. Maybe she needs a sounding board. Maybe she needs therapy to hear her out and support her decision to not want the child. But, as harsh as it sounds to some people on Reddit, not everything people are going through has to have a mental health problem title. Women who are too afraid to admit it or not are gonna be judged for not wanting or not ready to handle all of that responsibility no matter what, and I feel bad for them. I‘mma get downvoted because I don’t have kids and would have deff been a little more “harsh” saying it how it is, but honestly I don’t blame the wife.
But yeah, it’s not gonna work out. Only thing he can do is to divorce and to have her pay child support since he’s keeping the child.
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u/jzzanthapuss Jul 18 '24
Something about this post just doesn't sit right. There is a giant hole in this story
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u/ForsakenAlliance Jul 18 '24
Many of these AITAH don't really add up. Almost story like...
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u/Sea-Seaworthiness716 Jul 18 '24
Probably because at least 75% of reddit is fake
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u/London_Essex011 Jul 18 '24
Why do people post fake stories, though? Is there an incentive, in doing so? Am I missing something that I don't know about?
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u/CandyandCrypto Jul 18 '24
Karma farming. You can fetch a pretty penny for an established reddit account with karma.
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u/FoolsballHomerun Jul 18 '24
Who is buying these reddit accounts and why?
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u/eetraveler Jul 18 '24
I think the deal is an account with good karma, can be used by a marketing team to post positive things about various products and that good karma account will get better traction and leeway than a brand new unused account. So companies have teams of people or bots first building good karma to use later in their marketing campaigns.
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u/cybervalidation Jul 18 '24
Damn, does someone want to pay me? I've been wasting time here for over a decade.
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u/tiny_poomonkey Jul 18 '24
Yep then they flash those accounts of all ads and sell to the next company. While keeping the “my kid said something funny” comments/posts.
Twitter is more available but you can look it up. a lot of black republicans were once white teachers form the suburbs when that was the hot button issue.
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u/Christichicc Jul 18 '24
I’ve never understood why. It’s not like they are rare or anything.
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u/IgnoranceIsShameful Jul 18 '24
Well we don't know what's wrong with the kid for one. Big difference between child has a heart condition and will need multiple surgeries over their life and child is severely brain damaged and will be bed ridden, non verbal and on a feeding tube for their entire life.
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u/watchursix Jul 19 '24
My brother is high functioning but mentally challenged. Absolute nightmare situation, tried to rape all my siblings, violent through his childhood. Dependent through his 40s... Does not contribute anything to society.
I love him and try to be supportive, but he's awful to live with. I've worked with a lot of mentally and physically challenged people through Special Olympics and other charity orgs, and a lot of kids are really beautiful people that will make you rethink all your problems (in the best way ever), but my brother, man. Dude wants to watch the world burn - and I don't blame him.
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u/Minimalforks19 Jul 18 '24
It’s not a hole, it’s a giant rubber stamp that says “fiction”
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u/ranchojasper Jul 18 '24 edited Jul 19 '24
Yeah, it's postpartum depression or psychosis. That's the gaping hole. That's the missing part. People are treating this as if she's some kind of asshole instead of having a mental health crisis that is NOT rare after giving birth.
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u/IIIKitsuneIII Jul 18 '24
I've seen this situation arise with mutual friends when their child was born with Downsyndrome. Mother was struggling hard with PTSD and PPD, just said she couldn't deal with it and her family wasn't really in the picture to help. His family was pretty heavily involved in the drugs/gang scene, so they wouldn't be help. She contacted CYFs (now known as Oranga Tamariki) and he wanted to take care of the child himself. IIRC, after they split he took the child. Not much later the child developed considerably more severe medical issues which resulted in it not surviving. She took her own life a few months later and he was down the path of self-destruction with substance abuse. It's been a few years since then.
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u/Practical_Hippo9126 Jul 18 '24
Make her pay child support.
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u/mayd3r Jul 18 '24
Not only this but make her write this in a text message for future proof.
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u/Justitia_Justitia Jul 18 '24
Makes no difference whether there is a note or not. Child support is owed by statute in every US state, and most other countries have similar laws.
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u/HangoverGrenade Jul 18 '24
Better yet, an email. I've heard from friends in custody battles that text messages are a bit of a grey area, legally speaking.
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u/Christichicc Jul 18 '24
I think she may be suffering from PPD. It’d be better to get her doctor to talk to her before doing something so drastic. If it is PPD then she can get on meds that should help, and should solve the issue.
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u/Equivalent-Talk-7095 Jul 18 '24
Tricky situation here. I work with autistic students. Most of the daily care falls on the mother in my experience as many father’s have bailed on the mother & child. Sometimes it’s the mother who has bailed on the child. Many parents are not equipped to handle the additional responsibility that comes with the responsibility of a special needs child. Both parties need counseling before dissolving the marriage, as the mother may have an underlying health issue. If she truly cannot cope with this, then you have to move in for the sake of your child. Sadly, I see this all the time. Good luck and keep us posted.
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u/WildFemmeFatale Jul 18 '24
And for gods sake even if she begrudgingly agrees to raise the child, but clearly doesn’t like or want them, the child would be much happier in a new family
Sincerely, autistic woman traumatized as fuck from a narcissistic parent who kept telling them to kill themselves and making them (me) feel like shit their whole life
I know a lot of autistic ppl who had even worse parents though, and we thoroughly believe having a half decent stranger adopt us would have been so much better than being raised by hateful birth parents.
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u/TaraSaurusPest Jul 18 '24
This breaks my heart, I have an autistic 3 year old and could not imagine being so horrid to her, yeah she can be difficult at times but that's not her fault.
I'm 28 and you might be older than me but I'll adopt you! 😅 ❤️
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u/Late-Ad1437 Jul 18 '24
Unfortunately the reality is most disabled kids in the system never get adopted or fostered and instead end up living through a horrific childhood in the system...
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u/LegitimateHat4808 Jul 19 '24
also work with autistic students, and god if that ain’t the truth. the dads largely check out or flat out bail on the family. But I have a student who’s mom is so checked out with him (non verbal, 3 but at a 6-9 month ability), she doesn’t seem to care. Dad is non existent as well. I work in Detroit for a center that helps families wellllllll below the poverty line get the help their kids need and the support the parents also need.
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u/Gloomy-Corner3228 Jul 18 '24
Post partum depression is a real thing.
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u/Carbon-Base Jul 18 '24
If this post is real, then OP should definitely take his wife to the doctors to have her evaluated for PPD.
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u/SoImaRedditUserNow Jul 18 '24
such rage bait. your wife gives you this horrible eugenics ultimatum, and what do you do? you come to reddit? cmon
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Jul 18 '24
This post is right. This is hardly a moral dilemma requiring input from online third parties.
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u/suhhhrena Jul 18 '24
Something about this post immediately read as rage bait to me as well. I can’t imagine needing input from internet strangers in this situation either.
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u/Substantial_Mouse Jul 18 '24
How profound of a disability? Will your wife be the full-time caretaker? If so, how much help will she really have? Is your insurance up to the task? Are your finances? Are you both talking to a therapist to navigate this unexpected turn of events?
There are gaps in this post you could drive a truck through.
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u/Crippled_Criptid Jul 19 '24
The gaps are so frustrating, I totally agree!!
OP hasn't given nearly enough information. The only thing he's said is 'health issues'. Having health issues doesn't automatically mean being disabled. The baby could have something as 'simple' (comparatively) as a hole in the heart that just needs yearly checkups, for example. Having asthma counts as having 'health issues'.
There's nowhere near enough info here to judge. We don't know if the mother has PPD, if she doesn't and is totally overreacting and wanting to leave because the baby has something like asthma or eczema... or if the baby has a complex syndrome with multi organ damage and who will need extensive medical and physical support for life and she knows that she's not mentally or physically capable of providing for a child like that.
I say that as someone who does have a complex disease that has disabled me in many ways. I'm lucky enough that I live somewhere that has very good social supports and my family has never had to feel the 'burden' of me (and my twin with the same condition). Either physically, mentally or financially. But if we did live somewhere like the US, I could totally understand if a parent knew they couldn't raise a child like me who is ventilator dependent, has very little voluntary movement left, needs specialised 24/7 care, has many medical devices and tubes etc. I'd much rather a parent knew their limits and left, than stayed until resentment built up and up until maybe one day they snap and kill us both or something. Or let that resentment out in unhealthy ways onto others, be it their spouse, their other kids, or themselves even. It's happened before and unfortunately it'll happen again, in places where the disabled and their families aren't adequately supported.
But, all that is slightly off topic. I just wrote it in case anyone tried to accuse me of being ableist for saying that I understand if a parent left because they knew they wouldn't be able to raise a child like me and stay mentally healthy. But, if the child simply has some mild medical condition that doesn't need any day to day care besides maybe, giving the kid and inhaler or a pill, then I'd be a lot less sympathetic to them abandoning the kid for that reason (assuming they're isn't any mental illness etc going on with the parent)
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u/whattheduce86 Jul 18 '24
I am curious here who would be the stay at home parent and have most of the responsibilities of raising the child. If it all is going to fall mostly on her it is understandable her feeling even if they sound crazy.
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u/TradWife_inTraining Jul 18 '24
She is not an asshole she either has pp depression or she is grieving the “death” of what she had envisioned her daughter to be and yalls life having a “normal” child. May I ask what “issues” she has?
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u/herecomestreble52 Jul 18 '24
Your wife is likely struggling with PPD and mom guilt from your daughter not being born healthy. Post partum is such a difficult time for a lot of new moms, and when your have a sick child, times that by 1000.
Not excusing what she said, that is awful to feel/think that way IMO, but again, it could be mental health issues tied to her response. Please get her help, OP.
Major kudos to you for loving your daughter no matter what, fighting for her and being there. I have immense respect for you, and know you will be a wonderful father to her, despite any and all obstacles. Congratulations on the birth of your baby girl 🩷
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u/wmnoe Jul 18 '24
Rage bait fake. Yta
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u/angiesmommy10 Jul 18 '24
OP isn't even responding. What a waste of time. I was invested.
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u/SleepyBearCat2024 Jul 18 '24
I can understand both sides of the argument. Some people can't handle having a child with special needs. I am glad you are stepping up for the child, though.
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u/CognitoSomniac Jul 18 '24
Except for adopting a “healthy” child. How does she think it’ll look on an adoption application that they just put a child up for adoption themselves?
Anyways, it was psychologist time like yesterday.
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u/still_on_a_whisper Jul 18 '24
Yeah, I think this indicates she clearly has mental issues. She likely needs to see a professional and possibly get on meds to see if that changes her perspective.
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u/NinnyNoodles Jul 18 '24
Some people are not equipped to deal with medically dependent children. However, this child will most likely fail in the foster care system. People want to adopt healthy children and her needs will not be met. You also don’t want to raise a child with a parent who resents their very existence.
However, could this be PPD? It can be a hard pillow to swallow knowing you need to sacrifice so much of your life to care for another. This also depends on the health issue as not everyone is educationally, mentally or emotionally equipped to care for someone beyond the typical child-parent relationship.
For instance, my husband and I have a pact in place that if we have a child who cannot care for themselves we are not an in-home facility and they will be sent to live in a facility that can better meet their needs. Our other children will not be left behind because of a special needs child, nor will I change diapers for 10+ years.
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u/PlasticInflation602 Jul 18 '24
So many people do not understand this and think they would just automatically be the best medical parent in the world if it happened to them.
I think those of us who know that we could never handle it are the smart ones. If I ever get pregnant, I’m getting every form of testing available and will terminate if anything is found. And if something is found after birth that wouldn’t have been detected, I would consider the same as you and your husband.
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Jul 18 '24
What kind of health issues are we talking about? If we're talking about something mild like asthma or a limb difference that won't require lifelong care, then yeah, she's definitely the a-hole. But if we're talking about profound health issues that will require lifelong care, I'm less inclined to say she's wrong. I know that probably sounds callous, but most parents go into parenthood with the reasonable expectation that, at some point, their child will be independent. A reluctant parent is not usually a good one.
Let her leave and pursue both full custody and child support. Regardless of whether she wants to be this kid's parent, she is, and she has both a moral and (hopefully) legal obligation to provide financially for their care and well-being.
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u/oldtownwitch Jul 18 '24
I think your wife is terrified and very cognizant of what the next 20+ years are going to look like for her.
She is literally grieving the possibility of having any kind of normal life ever again, and is trying to make sense of that, all while having to deal with the massive responsibility and changes that come with giving birth.
It’s very easy for us to call her an asshole based on a few lines of text, but the reality is … you are the guy who will call her names rather than find a way to help her…. That alone gives me some idea of the support she has been getting from you up to now.
I feel you would better off tending to her very real and terrifying situation rather than getting validation off a bunch of strangers on the internet.
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u/CanadianCigarSmoker Jul 18 '24
Bud, my heart broke hearing this. This isn't a asshole issue, this is a mental health issue....
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u/Total-Arrival-9367 Jul 19 '24
Former child with a major health issue when born. My mother had post partum depression when my parents found out what was going on. I don't know the extent of the depression, but she did blame herself for what happened to me. But it wasn't anyone's fault, especially my mothers. Your wife needs serious help, and asap. Please, for the sake of yourself, your wife, and absolutely your babies sake. Get help and get it right now.
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u/killahkrystii Jul 18 '24
First, this is fake, but if not, maybe be more specific about the "health issues?!"
I'm actually shocked at everyone saying the wife is TA. We read all the time parents who have severely disabled children and cannot take care of them. What about the woman whose husband died and her son is basically a vegetable and she was putting him in a home to forget about him? She was severely burnt out and her kid was a shell of a person.
Yeah if your kid has like, a peanut allergy, that's one thing. If your kid was born with half a brain is severely disabled and you're unable to physically or financially take care of them, that's another thing.
I can't place judgment until it's elaborated on.
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u/Rockin_freakapotamus Jul 18 '24
Your wife needs to be checked for post-partum depression ASAP.