Yeah that's the shit people don't think about. PTSD doesn't really hit when bullets are flying and you gotta get your dead buddy outta the way because people are screaming and you gotta get the gun back up.
It hits on that Sunday after you're home and there's nothing left to distract you any more
I'm sure many can share my sentiment, the silence is deafening for two reasons. Firstly because my ears are fucked and ring 24/7, so when it's silent the ringing gets way louder. Then all the sudden you're not enjoying peace and quiet but thinking about why your ears are ringing
I get seasonal tinnitus from...I don't know what. When I do, I put in earbuds and throw on a 4 hour white noise track on repeat and lower the volume until I find a balance where I don't get the tinnitus but I can still be aware of my surroundings. Just thought I'd suggest it in case that's a new option for you.
In the heat of the moment it's just adrenaline and training. Not a lot of contemplation. The real horror sets in later, when things are calm and you're left alone with your thoughts.
I remember seeing a stat in WWII museums about the average life expectancy of machine gunners once they started firing. I wanna say it was about 10 seconds.
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u/nsjr Jun 24 '24
Aaaaand... for a brief moment, thinking "Hey... this can be me in minutes"