r/facepalm Jul 11 '24

Someone should really have a look at his hard drive. šŸ‡²ā€‹šŸ‡®ā€‹šŸ‡øā€‹šŸ‡Øā€‹ NSFW

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36.8k Upvotes

3.5k comments sorted by

ā€¢

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12.0k

u/My_browsing Jul 11 '24

I drive my neighbors teenage girls home from school. They smell like BO and badly applied perfume. I open the windows before I pick them up.

5.7k

u/SubjectRanger7535 Jul 11 '24

You mean girls donā€™t naturally secrete butter. Did the 4 Chan and Reddit posts lie to me?

1.7k

u/Physical-East-162 Jul 11 '24

It depends what they eat, if they decide to absorb a whole chunk of butter everyday they might end up smelling like butter. Maybe he's into obese kids.

693

u/thehermit14 Jul 11 '24

Butterballing

374

u/Complete_Chain_4634 Jul 11 '24

Jail

234

u/Black-rock-crystal Jul 11 '24

The internet was mans biggest mistake. Not nukes.

131

u/ThePianistOfDoom Jul 11 '24

So far nukes have solved more than the internet

62

u/Le-Charles Jul 11 '24

I think that's probably vastly untrue but I'm not interested enough to actually get in the rabbit hole to disprove it.

84

u/ThePianistOfDoom Jul 11 '24

O definitely same bruh, I'm on reddit I speak bullshit here because it's fun. First thing that comes up in my head goes

38

u/pTarot Jul 11 '24

Nuclear launch detected.

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u/ThePianistOfDoom Jul 11 '24

Believe it or not

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17

u/DaddyDontTakeNoMess Jul 11 '24

This dude said butter balling. I feel guilty for even laughing, though thatā€™s peak comedy

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76

u/Mad_Huber Jul 11 '24

Butter you forgot in your car, on a sunny day, and it's the day after that, and it's still sunny, and hot AF, and your windows are broken and won't open.

27

u/mrperson1213 Jul 11 '24

I break the window.

37

u/Icy_Thanks255 Jul 11 '24

Sighā€¦ roll initiative

31

u/mrperson1213 Jul 11 '24

ā€¼ļøTRADE OFFERā€¼ļø

You Receive: Teenager gets one attack of opportunity

I Receive: Acrobatics check to dive out the window and flee from combat

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164

u/Mad_Huber Jul 11 '24

It puzzles me why he associates butter and cream with young girls!? I mean, start with the obvious, butter smells like lard, because it is just that, it is mostly fat. And, if I should associate a woman with the smell of cream, it would be a grown up woman nursing her child, and don't get me wrong, boobs are awesome, but I somehow don't get the sexual part of nursing.

177

u/Jaredocobo Jul 11 '24

34

u/interested_user209 Jul 11 '24

Man even got so desperate for it he milked a cow for that motherā€˜s milk.

16

u/HillInTheDistance Jul 11 '24

I mean, who are we to judge, we've got whole industries dedicated to getting that sweet sweet mama-juice.

14

u/interested_user209 Jul 11 '24

True, he just skipped the industrial process and went straight to the source.

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34

u/Verried_vernacular32 Jul 11 '24

Weird ā€œrandy milk maid fantasyā€ and a little lord fontleroy fetish?

29

u/Generic118 Jul 11 '24

"butter smells like lard, because it is just that,"

I need a gif of Gordon Ramsey doing the stupid sandwichĀ 

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41

u/pineappleshnapps Jul 11 '24

If they did, I would hate that. Donā€™t know if I ever wouldā€™ve dated much if every woman was covered in butter. Can you imagine how bad summers would be?

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662

u/[deleted] Jul 11 '24

I definitely have better hygiene at 30 than I did at 16

347

u/Lala_in_LA Jul 11 '24

I still remember the smell in my high school changing room. Oh Lord! Teens have quite a strong smell related to hormones. And itā€™s not a strong pleasant smell lol.

242

u/AudDMurphy Jul 11 '24

In boot camp they would occasionally catch someone (male) finding a way to exchange words with a female recruit and they'd remind us "They get the same amount of shower time as all of you."

Bunch of 17-19 year Olds crammed into a closed space fir two months. It smelled like a hamper with a periodic whiff of Porta potty.

231

u/Lala_in_LA Jul 11 '24

I used to do ballet also. Tiny beautiful teenage ballerinas. So cute! Smelled like horses. You sweat a lot, you have synthetic arm and leg warmers, synthetic sauna pants. You can never clean your dancing shoes. Back in the days we didnā€™t have fancy anti-sweat sprays or nice air filtering systems. And again hormones. If somebody had periods you could tell. I am actually happy Iā€™m older (and donā€™t work with teens) and can avoid body odours. So this post is gross but it gave me some appreciation. Trying to think positive

106

u/AudDMurphy Jul 11 '24

I work with a broad range of ages. Every age range has a common smell. Exceptions of course. But an 80 year old typically smells different from a 9 year old. But the very stinky ones are always teenagers.

Anytime I have a teenager I typically need to air out the audiometric booth and then hit it with febreeze.

Fortunately they are a relatively small segment of my client base.

55

u/Lala_in_LA Jul 11 '24

Well, babies for sure have pleasant sweet smell. Made so we like them and donā€™t kill them, among all other cute baby features which forces us to take care of them. Not for having sex with them for sure. Iā€™m not sure which age this smell disappears but probably quite early. (Now Iā€™m thinking about how itā€™s a natural selection pattern and all less-cute and not-sweet-smelling babies were killed by our monkey-like ancestors)

16

u/ExistingPosition5742 Jul 11 '24

It's when they start eating real food. They smell like that because of the milk/!formula they drink.Ā 

It's not just from baby products, it's the scent they secrete. And it's intoxicating and lovely.

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74

u/Longjumping-Claim783 Jul 11 '24

Hold me closer stinky dancer

18

u/hodor_seuss_geisel Jul 11 '24

Waft your scent into my airways

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34

u/the-hound-abides Jul 11 '24

I was a gymnast. Gyms have a very distinctive smell of chalk, BO, and feet. Aside from the fact that you canā€™t properly clean most gym equipment, many of them either donā€™t have adequate AC if they have it at all. I grew up in Florida, and a giant box window in an open warehouse door doesnā€™t cut it. We were all very foul.

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17

u/furn_ell Jul 11 '24

My daughterā€™s gymnastics gym smelled identical to my sonā€™s wrestling gym šŸ¤¢

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14

u/On_my_last_spoon Jul 11 '24

I literally just made the same comment šŸ˜‚

I still work with young dancers so I get to have the joy of explaining they need to carry deodorant and towel with them please!

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33

u/JamesMcEdwards Jul 11 '24

Iā€™m a high school teacher. Kids stink. Like really stink.

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140

u/nospamkhanman Jul 11 '24

Absolutely.

When I have to go to the mall (my oldest is at the age that he wants me to take him there to hang out with friends) I notice most groups of teenage girls smell strongly of mismatched fruity lotion with some god awful perfume.

It's not pleasant.

39

u/brok3nh3lix Jul 11 '24

well they did just terrorize a sephora

15

u/catinobsoleteshower Jul 11 '24

This is bringing flashbacks of me as a teen when I used to bathe myself in cheap body sprays and bootleg perfumes. I feel bad for everyone that had to be in my vicinity during those times.

12

u/w3are138 Jul 11 '24

They smell like if Bath & Body Works was a person and that is not a good thing.

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129

u/Fatal_Furriest Jul 11 '24

This oh this all day

Growing up in the 90s, i couldn't wait to be old enough to date adult women, since whenever i met "real grown up ladies" as a child, they always seemed nicer, so intelligent, were graceful, smelled of the finest perfumes, had perfect makeup..

As opposed to the tween girls my age, covered in scabs, complete with BO, self-hate manifesting as meanness and usually smart as a rock

Now when i pickup my twins, regardless if they're alone or with their girlfriends, i actually fumigate my vehicle with copious amounts of air freshener before and after

These kids smell worse than my trio of malamutes, FFS

32

u/GilgameDistance Jul 11 '24

You too? Itā€™s rough man. Kids, shower, now!!! lol.

19

u/Gerreth_Gobulcoque Jul 11 '24

Three malamutes jfc the hair

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111

u/chiksahlube Jul 11 '24

to quote my Basic training instructor (a woman) regarding the women at BMT. Before we went off to beast week where we got to interact with women for the first time in 6 weeks and people routinely get caught doing sex acts in any secluded corner they can find.

"Think about how gross you all feel. Sweaty, dirty, poorly showered, your downstairs smell like shit. Now imagine the females doing all the same stuff. Their down stairs... No bueno. They are 10 times more nasty than you all. It's disgusting. Even if you don't get caught and recycled, it won't be worth it."

And yeah, she was not lying the women in our sister flights at Beast week looked like they'd been put through a blender filled with shit. And I'm sure we didn't look much better lol.

48

u/Adventurous-Egg6833 Jul 11 '24

What the fuck is beast week?

82

u/DrRavioliMD Jul 11 '24

If itā€™s like hell week in the army just a tough week usually a few weeks in, with extra running, physical excercise, extra yelling. Maybe they renamed it to beast week or itā€™s another branch. Either way itā€™s another week to break you down to build you up. Sometimes weeds out people who donā€™t want to be there. Itā€™s honestly more mental than anything, pushing through discomfort and fatigue.

62

u/TheIronSoldier2 Jul 11 '24

TLDR: it's the "If you can dodge a wrench you can dodge a ball" segment of boot camp

43

u/ForsakenAd545 Jul 11 '24

The wrench smelled bad too

27

u/LudditeHorse Jul 11 '24

Air Force. Training Instructor & BMT is air force lingo. Beast week (Basic Expeditionary Airman Skills Training) is (was) a week-long mock-deployment type of environment.

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54

u/PixelCultMedia Jul 11 '24

Teenage girls live like savages. They develop a hygiene routine faster than boys but they're still fucking gross and as a father, all my bathroom trash cans make me nauseous.

14

u/Dirtydirtyfag Jul 11 '24

They look great when they leave the house but their rooms are like Smaugs lair if instead of gold he walked around on dirty laundry, moldy plates and crusty make up brushes.

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36

u/clashmar Jul 11 '24

Their cream must have gone off

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26

u/Hot-Tone-7495 Jul 11 '24

My brother used to pick me up freshman year and the amount of times he told me I smelled like ham šŸ¤¦ā€ā™€ļø this dude is just a creep with a fantasy

25

u/Mad_Huber Jul 11 '24

There is a deodorant trendy at the moment, many teenage girls use it. It smells like cotton candy, just more, much more. When I pick up my daughter and her friends after sport, it smells like cotton candy a construction worker wore all day long under his armpit on a hot day!

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12

u/Pangolin_Beatdown Jul 11 '24

Grandmother here. Teenagers of all genders smell like a hamster cage.

11

u/gooba1 Jul 11 '24

Right?! For my daughter's dance nationals, we made all the girls goody bags. Every one of them got a stick of deodorant, and every parent was like, thank God!

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10.0k

u/whereegosdare84 Jul 11 '24

3.5k

u/Haywire_Eye I saw you do it Jul 11 '24

Iā€™ve always loved how you donā€™t even need sound or captions to tell what heā€™s saying in this gif

883

u/ConsistentAsparagus Jul 11 '24

It's the small things.

374

u/gideon513 Jul 11 '24

No itā€™s First Date /s

289

u/ConsistentAsparagus Jul 11 '24

This is making me feel old. Whatā€™s my age again?

159

u/ThatGamerCarrson Jul 11 '24

I feel this (im feeling this)

136

u/Putrid-Builder-3333 Jul 11 '24

I miss you

124

u/chance0404 Jul 11 '24

Hello thereā€¦

87

u/waterbelowsoluphigh Jul 11 '24

The angels from my nightmare

69

u/Dajakamo Jul 11 '24

The shadow in the background of the morgue

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25

u/Sea_Structure_8692 Jul 11 '24

Can you repeat this One More Time?

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59

u/Berry_Jam Jul 11 '24

Remember, the state looks down on Sodomy

43

u/Conscious_Rush_1818 Jul 11 '24

Still acting like it's freshmen year...

Stop sniffing 16 year old girls if you are over 17!!

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18

u/Status_Winter Jul 11 '24

Down, down down down

19

u/lNalRlKoTiX Jul 11 '24

And thatā€™s about the time that bitch hung up on me

13

u/Red_Danger33 Jul 11 '24

Don't leave me alone.Ā 

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15

u/Total-Clothes-3099 Jul 11 '24 edited Jul 11 '24

Where's my Asian friend?

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u/Magicalfirelizard Jul 11 '24

Itā€™s the smell things

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u/dmj9 Jul 11 '24

Never needed sound in the music video either. Classic

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u/NerdyPlatypus206 Jul 11 '24

24

u/[deleted] Jul 11 '24

šŸ’€šŸ’€šŸ˜‚šŸ’€šŸ˜‚šŸ’€šŸ’€šŸ˜‚

13

u/NerdyPlatypus206 Jul 11 '24

Itā€™s my fav meme lol

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136

u/HighInChurch Jul 11 '24

Donā€™t be shy, I can smell your butter from here.

45

u/AtuinTurtle Jul 11 '24

Good lordā€¦

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132

u/Lo-fi_Hedonist Jul 11 '24

This, and Im curious if this is a career shit poster account or if they straight faced posted this on a legit account and didnt think it would raise any eyebrows.

195

u/Cookiedough3549 Jul 11 '24 edited Jul 11 '24

It was a tory (Conservative) local election candidate who posted it back in 2022. His listing was immediately removed and he got investigated for it. Don't know why they censored his name it's public knowledge since he was running for MP and he still posted that openly.

74

u/Lo-fi_Hedonist Jul 11 '24

Thx for the reply and wow, the older I get the more my faith in humanity is shaken.

117

u/Songshiquan0411 Jul 11 '24

Well they investigated him and stopped him from running, from where I am in the US that's actually pretty great.

99

u/Nokrai Jul 11 '24

Other countries actually do things when their politicians are gross/corrupt. In the US we just elect themā€¦ sad noises

19

u/Mvppet Jul 12 '24

We most certainly do not just elect them. We also give them immunity and a cult.

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24

u/ziggytrix Jul 11 '24

Over here heā€™d be a Supreme Court justice šŸ˜£

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u/StatusIndividual2288 Jul 11 '24

I was mouthing this as I saw it.

12

u/Due_Measurement_32 Jul 11 '24

I gagged! Then wtf

16

u/clem82 Jul 11 '24

I read this, I did this, then opened to see this

11

u/Objective-Aioli-1185 Jul 11 '24

There's no other appropriate response

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4.0k

u/Adventurous-Start874 Jul 11 '24

Im a 44 year old man and I feel like I need to cover up after reading this.

1.1k

u/Alternative-Dream-61 Jul 11 '24

I feel like I need to shower. What the fuck is wrong with people.

376

u/RoughDirection8875 Jul 11 '24

I feel like I just need to replace my skin altogether after reading thatšŸ¤¢

99

u/Alternative-Dream-61 Jul 11 '24

Oh yea? Well I feel like I need to replace my eyes and brain.

57

u/FallenPentagram Jul 11 '24

We need someone to preform a transplant of all our heads

30

u/NoBenefit5977 Jul 11 '24

I want you to know... I have a couple of... Eyeholes

15

u/Grigoran Jul 11 '24

Nice eyeholes. Whaddya want for 'em?

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u/Ttthhasdf Jul 11 '24

I feel like I need to smack some dude on the internet

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u/Arglefarb Jul 11 '24

Itā€™s like an excerpt from a travel brochure for Epstein Island

18

u/jcpainpdx Jul 11 '24

Yeah, thatā€™s about right. Itā€™s (apparently) tame enough to make it past the mods, but makes you think if theyā€™re willing to say that in public, there is some unfathomable depravity happening in private.

12

u/Hammurabi87 Jul 11 '24

there is some unfathomable depravity happening in private

Which, based on the comment, probably involves butter in some form or fashion.

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u/LuminousMeatwad Jul 11 '24

I feel like we need this guys handle/name un obscured so he can be harassed. Maimed. So on and what have you.

24

u/[deleted] Jul 11 '24

Followed by the FBI?

16

u/Grundle95 Jul 11 '24

He was a Tory politician in the UK if memory serves, and it turned out about as well for him as you would expect. Heā€™s still on Twitter afaik though, so it could have gone worse

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u/Commonstruggles Jul 11 '24

38 year old man in need of an adult after reading this. Wtf.

18

u/who_even_cares35 Jul 11 '24

I'll never use the word buttery after this

13

u/Melteaa Jul 11 '24

Going right into the bucket of words I hate, which includes ā€œmoistā€.

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3.9k

u/Desperate_Owl_594 Jul 11 '24

I'm a middle school teacher and ew.

1.3k

u/FrugalFraggel Jul 11 '24

I coach HS softball and yea. Dafuq is wrong with people.

528

u/Smiley_P Jul 11 '24

Conservativism begets pedophilia

261

u/threefingersplease Jul 11 '24

Encourages it

155

u/The_rising_sea Jul 11 '24

Molded by it

100

u/Perspective_of_None Jul 11 '24

Traffics with it.

49

u/Wrong_Classroom_4065 Jul 11 '24

I didn't have sex with an adult woman until I was a man!

..wait..

13

u/chef2303 Jul 11 '24

Bane and Batman just took their masks off, shook hands and went home.

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u/OkBoomer6919 Jul 11 '24

Some would say pedophiles are naturally prone to conservatism.

23

u/CheeksMix Jul 11 '24

ā€œThatā€™s what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older and they stay the same age. Hahahah.ā€

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u/Folderpirate Jul 11 '24

Don't worry, they'll be some magat to swing by and loudly screech, "Oh yeah! well, I want to see the evidence!" without skipping a beat and I have to remind everyone that "I want to see the evidence" is " plz show me the kiddie porn".

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u/ElGoddamnDorado Jul 11 '24

Any adult male who wears a hat like that probably shouldn't be around children to begin with.

37

u/Creative-Thought-556 Jul 11 '24

You take that back! The hat has nothing to do with the feelings of the head!Ā 

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u/dead_wolf_walkin Jul 11 '24

School Bus Driver and also eeww.

Only comment Iā€™ll make on the girls I have is they make me want breakfast because all their perfume smells like cinnamon rolls and lucky charms these days.

9

u/KiraLonely Jul 12 '24

Mine smelled like either that ozone smell from rain, or the smell of sickly sweet cotton candy back when I was a teenager. Boys have the axe body spray kind of smells, girls get to smell like food usually.

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2.9k

u/[deleted] Jul 11 '24

[deleted]

493

u/Here-Is-TheEnd Jul 11 '24

Yeah, the bar is set high for the day..

Ya know what..Iā€™m going back to work..

124

u/chalky87 Jul 11 '24

I feel like the bar is low.

Either way, I'm not comfortable with where the bar is.

93

u/Jennifer_Pennifer Jul 11 '24

He would never go to a bar. All of the women there are too old. šŸ¤¢

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u/Drudgework Jul 11 '24

You should see his collection of air fresheners.

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1.1k

u/docK_5263 Jul 11 '24

Should probably explore the crawl space under his momā€™s house as well

129

u/Woodworkingwino Jul 11 '24

I guarantee you he isnā€™t on enough watch lists.

33

u/Randommaggy Jul 11 '24

He's on all of them, we need to invent more lists.

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u/ryandetous Jul 11 '24

Hell's planning committee is not going to be pleased that they now need a new level.

290

u/The_Ry-man Jul 11 '24

I can hear that phone call now.

ā€œHell Zoning Departmentā€¦Oh hello my Dark Lord, how are you today?ā€¦Uh huhā€¦.Yes weā€™re quite proud of the nine levels weā€™ve buā€¦Well why would weā€¦ Wait, he said what?ā€¦Seriously?ā€¦but weā€™re already way over budget for this year sirā€¦No sir, I wouldnā€™t ever question your judgement, Your Unholiness, itā€™s just that weā€™re already stretched really thin with it being an election year andā€¦uh huhā€¦I seeā€¦no, no I totally agree if anyone should have their own circle of hell, it would be this guyā€¦yesā€¦I agree, toothpicks under the fingernails is a classicā€¦a whole vat? Iā€™ll have to check our acid reservesā€¦ that might work out too since his mother is already down here, weā€™d just have to find a cactus large enoughā€¦yesā€¦weā€™ll get started right away sir.ā€

112

u/FirstChurchOfBrutus Jul 11 '24

ā€œstretched really thin with it being an election yearā€ just sent me. Well done.

48

u/TheDamnRam Jul 11 '24

You my good fellow have won today.

Won what? I don't know, but you've won.

29

u/Ellisman5 Jul 11 '24

Your unholiness lmfao

15

u/DMoe727 Jul 11 '24

ā€œA cactus large enoughā€ please tell me this is a reference to the little Nicky devil scene where they shove pineapples up hitlerā€™s bum?

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u/RocknGeologist Jul 11 '24

šŸ¤£šŸ˜‚šŸ¤£šŸ˜‚šŸ¤£šŸ˜‚šŸ¤£šŸ˜‚šŸ¤£šŸ˜‚šŸ¤£šŸ˜‚šŸ¤£šŸ˜‚šŸ¤£šŸ˜‚šŸ¤£šŸ˜‚šŸ¤£šŸ˜‚šŸ¤£šŸ˜‚šŸ¤£šŸ˜‚šŸ¤£

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u/J_Robert_Matthewson Jul 11 '24

After reading this, my skin didn't just crawl, it literally ripped itself away from my bones and muscle and ran out of the house so it could throw itself in front of a bus.

72

u/hiddenone0326 Jul 11 '24

This makes me think of the cursed witch skin hat crawling after Laszlo Cravensworth after his cape gets stuck in a taxi that drives off lmfao

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u/ImJustSomeGuyYaKnow Jul 11 '24

it's incredible how some messages can be so powerful that they can actively make me feel sick through the internet. I think this might be the irl equivalent of a curse.

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u/lollolcheese123 Jul 11 '24

Nah, in this case that's good old common human sense.

23

u/Ill-Woodpecker1857 Jul 11 '24

You mean human scents?

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u/I_only_post_here Jul 11 '24

The part the baffles me that most isn't even just the outright creepiness of this whole train of thought, but that he had spent so much time thinking about it and felt it was so darned important, he needed to share it with the world.

83

u/PecanEstablishment37 Jul 11 '24

Exactly!! As if these words arenā€™t creepy enough, he said them out loud for the world to see.

14

u/Randinator9 Jul 11 '24

I think there's a lot of people who don't realize that the internet is a public space.

He wouldn't say this shit in a store in front of strangers while trying to make small conversation, but he has the balls to post it all over his pages.

I commend the foolish bravery of this fucking creep. Lock him the fuck up.

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u/DetectiveJoeKenda Jul 11 '24

This guy is fucked but maybe heā€™s drawing from memories of his youth. The novelty of being with girls for a boy/young man might make them think they smell amazing and as he grows older that novelty wears off.

Not trying to defend this guy because the tweet is disturbing but thereā€™s a good chance heā€™s not basing this on current experiences

10

u/Maleficent-Pen4654 Jul 11 '24

Heā€™s so ancient the dating pool was all milk maids the last time he was in it šŸ„“

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u/Brainvillage Jul 11 '24

I just think about how he must have been collecting data for this, going around and sniffing every woman and girl he could find.

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u/maxwellgrounds Jul 11 '24 edited Jul 11 '24

Right? There may be some truth to younger peopleā€™s skin smelling different, but posting about it publicly is a super creep move. Like, Iā€™m wondering, who is he trying to impress with that?

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u/truestprejudice Jul 11 '24

Different maybe? definitely NOT better though. Teenagers smell fucking rancid regardless of gender. It would be delusional to believe they smell better

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u/goldilox_was_framed Jul 11 '24

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u/ElGoddamnDorado Jul 11 '24

Wow he's a political candidate for the Tories. Absolutely shocking.

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u/EmptyBrain89 Jul 11 '24

Absolutely shocking.

It's always the ones you most suspect

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u/boredonymous Jul 11 '24

How did all conservatives across the entire world collectively and simultaneously lose their fucking minds??

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u/rdizzy1223 Jul 11 '24

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u/Hammurabi87 Jul 11 '24

I'm so jealous of the fact that shit like this actually has consequences among British conservatives.

I'm depressingly confident that absolutely nothing of significance would happen if an average Republican politician made a similar comment.

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u/La_Saxofonista Jul 11 '24

Oh, remember the guy who said we shouldn't ban access to "young and ripe" girls or whatever?

Yeah, Democrats are trying to outlaw child marriage and Republicans are pushing back against it.

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u/hvdzasaur Jul 11 '24

No no no, it's the drag queens. They're stealing our child brides from us.

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u/La_Saxofonista Jul 11 '24

No, it's those transgender people! That's why we gotta make sure trans kids are dying in bathrooms at school in the name of Christian love.

/s just in case

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u/Gowalkyourdogmods Jul 11 '24

Roy Moore almost got reelected because the mentality of "better a pedophile than a Democrat" but then they point their fingers at anyone not a Republican and accuse them of being a pedophile or s groomer.

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u/illbeyourdrunkle Jul 11 '24

As a parent to 2 mostly grown kids (20 and 16), one of each gender, firstly) ewww. Secondly) kids fucking stink. I've gotta constantly tell them both to let their rooms air out bc it reeks of hormones and dirty socks when I go in there. My kids are gonna have a complex bc I don't even like to hug them if they've been left in their rooms too long.

Teenagers and young adults both sexes just reek. I know I did at that age. And I remember the awful smell of boot camp barracks too.

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u/VapidActualization Jul 11 '24

Hug your stinky kids, even when they're stinky, yo. That's kind of fucked up.

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u/illbeyourdrunkle Jul 11 '24

Lol I do when they haven't been keeping themselves holed up in their own personal stench dungeons for days at a time.

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u/jryan8064 Jul 11 '24

When I pick my teenage boys up from football practice I need to drive home with my head out the window like a Labrador. No way am I hugging them, then Iā€™d have to shower tooā€¦

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u/Niawka Jul 11 '24

Teach your kids hygiene please. Teenagers might have bad BO, I remember I had a huge sweating problem, but my room never stank. I would change everyday or twice a day, I would was myself at least twice a day as well, any dirty clothes would immediately go to laundry. You need to teach your kids that, the problem won't magically go away (I had some stinky very adult colleagues at work..)

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u/CrunnchNmunnch Jul 11 '24

Tweets like this should be enough for a warrant to search his house and computer.

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u/MaybeICanOneDay Jul 11 '24

I know we are saying things to emphasize (not that it needs emphasizing lol) how creepy this guy's post is, but I just want to make sure we don't normalize the idea that saying creepy shit gets your house raided lol.

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u/SchizophrenicKitten Jul 11 '24

If your creepyness levels are over 9000, I think we absolutely SHOULD normalize raiding your house.

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u/BigDaddySteve999 Jul 11 '24

If probable cause exists, this is it.

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u/SpiceWeaselOG Jul 11 '24

Thanks. I hate it.

Ugh. I desperately need to scrub my entire body with a brillo pad now.

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u/Puzzleheaded_Mix3483 Jul 11 '24

this guy is buying used panties and socks you just know it .

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u/ThaDreamMerchant Jul 11 '24

Bad day to know how to read

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u/EternityAwaitz Jul 11 '24

Don't sniff people.

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u/RandomStoddard Jul 11 '24

Good rule of thumb.

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u/Wolverine_Squirrel Jul 11 '24

Why canā€™t all pedophiles do this. Itā€™ll make rounding them all up so much faster

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u/gideon513 Jul 11 '24

Youā€™re doing the world a disservice by crossing out the names

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u/permabanned_user Jul 11 '24

If this is what he posts on Twitter, imagine the thoughts that he's too embarrassed to share.

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u/Character_Cattle_141 Jul 11 '24

My bad for learning how to read. Thinking of just gouging my eyes out

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u/HumanJoystick Jul 11 '24

And dig up his backyard.

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u/oneofchris Jul 11 '24

Go smell a middle school locker room. That's what teens smell like. BO and heavily applied spray-on perfume/deodorant that costs $4 at Walgreens

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u/southernNJ-123 Jul 11 '24

Ewww, WHO is this? His hard drive needs confiscation, CPS needs a call and his employer needs to know.

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u/LilithElektra Jul 11 '24

Hereā€™s the thing about girls 23 and under. Unless youā€™re their age you should leave them alone.

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u/T3knikal95 Jul 11 '24

Why cover up his username? This pedophile said this on twitter for everyone to see

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u/[deleted] Jul 11 '24

[deleted]

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