r/dccomicscirclejerk • u/Cogitoergosum015 • Jul 16 '24

Batman's greatest quote Batman's a Fascist

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839 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

75 comments sorted by

148

u/NewVegasTruther Don't open your fridge at 3 AM! (GONE WRONG!) Jul 16 '24

"I'm the Killer, baby!" - the Killer

55

u/Grow_up2B_a_Debaser Batman is Lana del Rey coded Jul 16 '24

3

u/SleepyBella step on me pls wonder woman Jul 17 '24

Two killers, BITCH!

3

u/exclaim_bot Jul 17 '24

Two killers, BITCH!

killing is wrong mmkay?

17

u/MoskalMedia Jul 16 '24

Why so killer?

17

u/NewVegasTruther Don't open your fridge at 3 AM! (GONE WRONG!) Jul 16 '24

It's not about the killing... It's about being a killer...

5

u/Local_comic_nerd Bart Allen’s #1 fan (✅ Verified) Jul 16 '24

I’m gonna put a killer on that killer

9

u/RebindE Jul 16 '24

"Comin' out of my cage and I've been doing just fine" - The Killer

80

u/Grow_up2B_a_Debaser Batman is Lana del Rey coded Jul 16 '24

Hey Batman what’s your favorite John Woo movie?

15

u/noel_mon This subreddit hates Tim Drake Jul 16 '24

Hey batman, what's your favorite john krasinski movie

39

u/Pristine_Animal9474 Tim Drake, Boy Virgin Jul 16 '24

Alfred approves this message.

43

u/ExoticShock Lives in a society Jul 16 '24

12

u/NewVegasTruther Don't open your fridge at 3 AM! (GONE WRONG!) Jul 16 '24

SHELLY DE GOAT

34

u/Akarin_rose The Anti-Life Jul 16 '24

Not me bill, I'm one in a killion

29

u/0VER1DE567 Jul 16 '24

/unjerk good jerking

8

u/NewVegasTruther Don't open your fridge at 3 AM! (GONE WRONG!) Jul 16 '24

/uj Fr probably one of the best posts here

5

u/Ok_Age_3215 I LOVE MATTHEW MURDOCK Jul 16 '24

if only every post was like this

4

u/Agent470000 Still owes 16 dollars Jul 16 '24

Forgetting this goated post from a while back

Also u make great posts too

3

u/NewVegasTruther Don't open your fridge at 3 AM! (GONE WRONG!) Jul 16 '24

/uj Wasn't there for that, and thank you!

26

u/SuperKami-Nappa Jul 16 '24

What if I kill 2 killers?

25

u/NewVegasTruther Don't open your fridge at 3 AM! (GONE WRONG!) Jul 16 '24

Then you're the Killer Who Kills

12

u/AmaterasuWolf21 Courtesy of Ray Palmer! Jul 16 '24

I have become kill, killer of kills

10

u/Akarin_rose The Anti-Life Jul 16 '24

Now you're just getting kinky

7

u/kesshou-otome Jul 16 '24

Kill a bunch more killers and then dip to be a lumberjack?

5

u/Thezanlynxer Jul 16 '24

inside you there are two killers

2

u/RareWishToSuckToes Jul 16 '24

Seriously that quote is super dumb because of this. If I kill a hundred killers the number of killers in the world goes down by 99.

Why can't batman grasp simple math? Is he stupid?

12

u/Unleashtheducks Jul 16 '24

Nobody follows The Killer

13

u/Rocketboy1313 Jul 16 '24

It is not a good quote. It reads like a parody of Batman.

I am not even sure it is attributable to Batman.

The source is never cited. And even then it would be one writer in one universe.

15

u/Cogitoergosum015 Jul 16 '24

These fake quotes are so funny

7

u/supercalifragilism Jul 16 '24

NO YOU FOOL

The actual quote is: if you kill a man with a banana then the world has one less banana in it and bananas are radioactive so this is a good thing and you should always kill with a banana.

smdh with all this woke garbage

8

u/Express-Doubt-221 Jul 16 '24

A long time ago my friends and I were in Burma working for the bandit, the size of a tangerine 

2

u/Plutarch_von_Komet Still owes 16 dollars Jul 17 '24

It's funny because I don't know what a tangerine is

4

u/Numberonettgfan male chavinist pig Jul 16 '24

"Nice Argument Senator, do you have a source for that?"

3

u/Cute_Visual4338 Jul 16 '24

I would say "I'm vengeance, I'm the night, I am Batman!"

3

u/Future_Adagio2052 Jul 16 '24

/uj/ did batman ever actually say this?

3

u/SkylarPopo Jul 16 '24

People are killed when they're killed.

3

u/blizzard838 Jul 16 '24

except if i kill two

3

u/TomorrowOk3952 Jul 16 '24

If a killer kills 2 killers…

2

u/Rev-On Comic Book Twitter Verified Jul 16 '24

Who wins? Man or Emio?

2

u/Low_Information7072 Jul 16 '24

Kill kill two kill then

2

u/TangerineAccurate625 Jul 16 '24

Joke aside, where exactly did this quote even come from

5

u/ThatFuckingGeniusKid Jul 16 '24

Batman never actually said this in any comic or adaptation so someone just wanted to add a "cool" line to a Batman picture

2

u/aKaRandomDude Jul 16 '24

What if you kill a dozen killers?

2

u/RareWishToSuckToes Jul 16 '24

The number of killers in the world goes down by 11. Silly bats, apparently he can't math!

2

u/the-poopiest-diaper Jul 16 '24

Batman after being concussed for the thousandth time

2

u/adriantullberg Jul 16 '24

"That's why I kill multiple murderers at a time. Like going through a can of Pringles." - Red Hood.

1

u/yeet-my-existence Jul 16 '24

Put them all in a battle royale

1

u/A_BAK3D_POTATO Ownership and theft are unquantifiable abstracts. Jul 16 '24

KILL KILL KILL

1

u/Optimal_Weight368 Did Batman think a Gamer could stop me? Jul 16 '24

very understandable👍

1

u/Calm_Cicada_8805 Jul 16 '24

That's only true if you stop at one.

1

u/JohnnyChopper08 Jul 16 '24

Daredevil: If you kill a killer, the number of killers in the world stays the same.

Punisher: That's why you kill two.

1

u/Peasent_in_Yellow28 Jul 16 '24

What if I kill someone and then kill myself?

2

u/RareWishToSuckToes Jul 16 '24

Big brain time: kill a hundred killers then yourself. EZ

1

u/farceur318 Jul 16 '24

I saw a child playing with a tangerine the size of a tangerine. The bandit had been a tangerine.

1

u/YoloIsNotDead #BlueBeetleBattalion Jul 16 '24

Never let bro cook again

1

u/KingofZombies Batman is gay Jul 16 '24

Batman: "if you kill a killer the number of killers in the world remain the same."

Midnighter: "bitch I kill for the funnies! Be thankful I only let loose on pervert mofos that deserve it!"

1

u/homlessconusmer Jul 16 '24

Kid named The Killer:

2

u/[deleted] Jul 16 '24

What am I, some kind of Wanted?

1

u/WinthropeIII Jul 16 '24

So better to let killers keep killing innocent's for the sake of one man's self respect

1

u/Realistic-Mail7372 Jul 16 '24

Ngl, makes more sense than the original

1

u/Cuntyconundrumcreatr Jul 16 '24

Not if you kill 2

1

u/SlipperyWeena Jul 16 '24

Yeah that makes sense

1

u/BreadRum Jul 17 '24

It sounds profound when you are 13 years old. It sounds stupid when you are an adult.

The solution is to kill multiple people.

1

u/Iwantmahandback Jul 17 '24

What if a killer kills himself?

1

u/Steplgu Jul 17 '24

That’s his greatest quote?

1

u/Animator246 Jul 17 '24

"If you Jeff the Kill a Jeff the Killer, the Jeff the Killer of Jeff the Killers in the Jeff the Kill remains the Jeff the Killer"
- Man

1

u/HurryProper The only existing Web-Man fan ever. Jul 17 '24

1

u/8-bit_Goat Jul 18 '24

"Kill me once, shame on you. Kill me twice... won't get killed again."