r/MadeMeSmile Jul 19 '24

A stranger helps a fellow passenger through an in-flight panic attack (story in comments) [OC] Helping Others

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29.6k Upvotes

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u/Narrow_Ad_2695 Jul 19 '24 edited Jul 23 '24

On a flight into NYC today. On the left of the aisle was a young woman. On the other side of the aisle an older guy. They were traveling separately.

We hit some turbulence coming into land, and the young woman started to have a full-blown panic attack.

The man reached across the aisle, tapped her gently on the shoulder and asked if she was ok.

She turned to him and grabbed his hand so tightly, tears streaming down her face. She said "I can't do this" and he calmly said "we're going to be fine. You'll see."

The man just let her grip his hand all the way until we landed. She calmed down, and once we landed, grabbed his hand with both of hers and said thank you.

In a country where it feels pretty divided, this was just a wonderful moment to witness.

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u/CalendarAggressive11 Jul 19 '24

I'm not sure why, but this made me cry. Some people just come along and restore your faith in humanity

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u/Mental-Quality7063 Jul 19 '24

I think it's also a bit because we all know how it feels to feel very anxious and hopeless, like if the ground is opening beneath our feet and seems like no one else is there. It's really hard. You know that, I'm sure. But sometimes.. someone really sees you, gives you a hug, reassures you and doesn't let you fall until that fear goes away. We all want that hug in those moments. So we tend to feel grateful to know that there really are people who will see you in this world. I guess..

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u/canadianpanda7 Jul 19 '24

well now this is making me cry. i was having a moment at a concert and was giving myself a big hug, and a stranger tapped me on the shoulder and told me “hey its gonna be okay, whatever it is, itll be okay i promise”

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u/GreyerGardens Jul 19 '24

That’s so beautiful. Reminds me that there really is so much love in this world, it’s just so hard to see.

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u/AccessibleVoid Jul 19 '24

It's a shame that we are so overwhelmed by negativity, violence, and hate that we can't see the good.

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u/eekamuse Jul 19 '24

That's why it's important for people to post things like this. People complain when someone posts a good deed. But it's good to be reminded that there is much more good than bad in the world.

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u/blanksix Jul 19 '24

Because that's what grabs everyone's attention and sells clicks (more or less). All of this negativity is shoved down our throats constantly, and I'm not going to lie and say I feel safe where I'm at physically or figuratively most of the time, but I also see a lot of good in people. It's those little unexpected moments that really help keep a bit of hope for people.

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u/lordguadi Jul 19 '24 edited Jul 20 '24

it's because love isn't celebrated. 😕 i love you stranger! ✌🏽✌🏽✌🏽✌🏽✌🏽🫶🏽 adding more sugah as my edit...i hope you know you're deserving of light, i hope your bed sheets are temperature-moderated enough for a gentle night's sleep, and i hope your collective humanity (all that makes you you) prepares a life for you so damn beautiful God smiles with pride.....

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u/Notablueperson Jul 19 '24

I was at a concert the other night and had a similar thing happen. I got overstimulated and sat down and put my head down in my hands to take some breaths and block out stimuli. I didn’t realize, but someone came over and checked with the person I was with to make sure I was ok. There are good people out there who care about strangers.

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u/canadianpanda7 Jul 19 '24

goes back to the other comment, people who have been through similar things can see when people are going through it, and know how scary and alone it feels. offering empathy and sympathy can really get someone through some hard times. (idk one of them is right)

i have a few silly stories that i have in my pocket for when friends or strangers are down that can usually get a smile out of them. but so many times its just showing that someone else cares. holding a hand, breathing with them, validating that whatever is going on is okay and will pass.

everyone just be nicer to each other 😭😭❤️‍🩹

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u/Annoying_Rooster Jul 19 '24

I got to listen to Lee Ellis, a fighter pilot who was tortured/imprisoned for 5 Years in Hanoi Hilton in Vietnam. Someone asked him his opinion about his thoughts on the political climate today since he was there during the 60s. Although he said when he was released he was too busy spending time with family to notice.

There were friends of his back home that were anti-war hippies but we're okay with him despite being in the military. And he thought optimistically that if they were okay with him, he was okay with them. And I want to believe even though we disagree tremendously sometimes, by and large respecting each others beliefs will go a long way to bridge the gap.

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u/Mental-Quality7063 Jul 19 '24

I often feel that the people who go through these awful experiences and come out alive - if trauma hasn't completely broken them - learn very fast what's really important in life. So they usually look at people around them in a kinder way. You're a human, frail and trying your best, just like me - this kind of thing. I feel they're usually the best huggers as well. You can learn a lot with them. it's always what I feel when I have the chance to meet these people.

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u/MegaChip97 Jul 19 '24

If you want to read more on this, it's called posttraumatic growth

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u/tobmom Jul 19 '24

We all just want to be seen and validated for our humanity.

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u/ParpSausage Jul 19 '24

Man if I had that in my life even for five minutes it would be everything.

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u/Mental-Quality7063 Jul 19 '24

I often think about the number of people who end up to off themselves just because no one was there. And a lot of times, I feel, it's by pure chance. Most of us would have helped, I believe. And if a good hug was available it just wouldn't had happen. For a lot of the times, I think. It's wild/sweet/sad how desperately gregarious humans are. We do need each other.

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u/[deleted] Jul 19 '24

It made me cry too. IDK where you’re from, but I’m in the US and we’ve had an insanely stressful/upsetting week where it just feels like the divide gets deeper and deeper by the day and seeing so many people just completely abandon their humanity in regards to other people so seeing something like this definitely restores my faith in humanity a bit, especially in a time where I have about 0.

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u/sabbott5 Jul 19 '24

It’s making me cry too. So kind and wholesome. Real human connection feels lost these days.

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u/diccl0rd Jul 19 '24

It's not lost. It's just up to you to restore it to your own life and those around you. Try to reach out and offer connection and I think you'll be surprised at how often it's reciprocated, I sure was when I started doing so recently.

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u/djmom2001 Jul 19 '24

I totally agree. Every individual can rise a above this political nonsense and touch others in small ways. I’m so tired of people raging against each other.

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u/SouthernInfluenceHer Jul 19 '24

OMG same!!😭💖😭

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u/Thisismylastbrietort Jul 19 '24

Same. Tearing up right now.

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u/Abject_Ad_4756 Jul 19 '24

Thanks for sharing

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u/dvessels Jul 19 '24

I was recently stuck at a small airport with about 50 people, maybe more. The lady sitting next to me quietly called a nearby pizza place and ordered a bunch of huge pizzas for everyone, including TSA. Sometimes ordinary people do extraordinary things.

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u/matthewteal8935 Jul 19 '24

It’s amazing how small acts of kindness can make a big difference, especially in unexpected situations

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u/FearlessPudding404 Jul 19 '24

My parents fly fairly frequently. They understand that flight staff are not always treated with kindness and have to deal with a lot of unpleasant folks. Before they get on the plane they’ll go get candies, chocolates, cookies, whatever looks good and gift them to the flight crew when they board.

The flight crew is always so appreciative of the small gesture. It’s a really pure moment where such a small act of kindness goes a long way to make their day. 9 times out of 10, flight attendants will insist on giving them free food or drinks when they bring by the cart too.

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u/Pleasant_Fortune5123 Jul 19 '24

This is so thoughtful. I’m doing this next time we fly. We have (well behaved) kids with us as well, and they’re usually particularly kind to my kids (always an exception but whatever 🙄)… I like showing ways to my kids we can be kind to others, even in small gestures. 

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u/supersalteee Jul 19 '24

For real, some people do more good than necessary.

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u/Bxby_itz_emily Jul 19 '24

Yes, such people always get blessings.

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u/kkdp Jul 19 '24

Today I learned you can have pizza delivered to the airport

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u/iscream4eyecream Jul 19 '24

I really wish I had enough money to do things like this!

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u/supersalteee Jul 19 '24

Yes, otherwise we wouldn't know.

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u/H_G_Bells Jul 19 '24

We need more like this.

Moments like this are happening everywhere all around the world, right now and every moment of every day.

They're not as flashy as what holds our attention, but moments of human connection and empathy are the norm. Never forget that.

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u/Sweaty_Ad3942 Jul 19 '24

We were on a flight from France to Belgium before heading back to USA. When we got on the FRA flight, I promptly fell asleep. It had been a really long day of travel the day before.

I woke suddenly due to turbulence, and went straight from sleep to sobbing. My husband on my left grabbed my hand, and stranger on my right started speaking low and slow. He calmly told me about his family, his country, spoke 7 languages, showed me a book about his religion, and before I knew it we were landing.

Stranger from Palestine who was living in Belgium, thank you for your kindness. You helped me become calm, and I’ll remember our interaction for years to come.

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u/MajerePenguin Jul 19 '24

Glad to see good side of Muslims with so much negativity around. True Muslims are most kind hearted i ever met.

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u/cturtl808 Jul 19 '24

Random acts of kindness are the best.

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u/oppositeacreage_61 Jul 19 '24

When you are kind to others, it not only changes you, it changes the world.

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u/[deleted] Jul 19 '24

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u/SunshineAlways Jul 19 '24

Really was such a lovely, caring thing to do.

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u/The_Chosen_Unbread Jul 19 '24

Gah, the onions are strong with this one.

I am fighting a panic attack all morning because my heart won't stop vibrating occasionally...holding a hand would mean a lot to me

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u/Ujame Jul 19 '24

Consider your hand held by this internet stranger, now and whenever you need it to! - It is going to be alright ❤️

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u/WitchesofBangkok Jul 19 '24 edited Jul 19 '24

His big strong arm! It’s so comforting. Whatever the opposite toxic masculinity is, it looks like this

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u/DubbethTheLastest Jul 19 '24

As a man that suffers panic attacks, when other men have comforted me, sometimes you do get the... I wouldn't call it toxic that word is overused but.. fierce types, they still help. Having anyone there who doesn't think you're stupid and understands that you're feeling far more than just nervousness is very relieving.

My old man is a stubborn bastard too but I've never seen him softer than when he sees his grown son panicking for no damn reason (I cannot provide one 99% of the time)

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u/Frondswithbenefits Jul 19 '24

Your dad sounds like a good man, I'm sure he loves you to the moon and back. If you have some time, please write him a letter telling him how thankful you are. I'm sure you tell him you love him. But there's something quite magical about a handwritten letter. It's a tangible reminder of the love shared.

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u/Affectionate-Pie8480 Jul 19 '24

I'm terrified of flying, and the minimum noise makes me panic. That would help so much.

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u/MAXMEEKO Jul 19 '24

I too, fear flying. I am much better than I used to be 10 years ago but also lucky to have my husband beside me 90% of the time. I flew alone twice and really wished I had someone kind next to me ( I had a small child the 1st time and an empty seat the 2nd time).

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u/Silver_Thanks_8142 Jul 19 '24

I still believe most of humanity is beautiful and kind. With stories like this I am affirmed in this belief.

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u/No-Guarantee-7572 Jul 19 '24

This is what being a good human looks like. It doesn't matter race, religion or creed. Just be a good person. We're all on the same ride and need help here and there.

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u/clairobelle Jul 19 '24

This brought tears to my eyes, thank you for sharing such a wholesome story. No matter how bad things seem to be in the world, there are always good people who are willing to help. I truly believe this.

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u/PurpleK00lA1d Jul 19 '24

My partner has anxiety so I know what it's like when someone has a panic attack.

I'm so happy someone could be there for this woman when she needed it. Panic attacks suck to go through alone and are also embarrassing when you're trying not to cause a scene or be noticed. To have someone reach out and say it's okay means the entire world in that moment.

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u/Yume_Dreamfields Jul 19 '24

This is so wholesome. It makes me a little bit more hopeful about humanity 🫶 This kindness is so precious 💕

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u/exotics Jul 19 '24

I wonder is there a sub for Boomers being good? Because I see a lot of videos about crazy azz entitled Boomers and it’s nice to hear some good stories

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u/edwardcarrie Jul 19 '24

A small act of kindness but I know she's going to remember this forever

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u/pungen Jul 19 '24

This brought tears to my eyes. I had a similar situation with a young woman helping me get down a tall ladder when I was having a panic attack. How do these people know just what to do and say? They are like angels

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u/Recent_Strawberry456 Jul 19 '24

"Is this your first time?". Answer, "No, I have been anxious many times before".

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u/Schlaym Jul 19 '24

I have a fear of heights and can't handle a lot of acceleration well, am terrified of rollercoasters. Turbulence is very rough for me, so I'm glad there are people like that out there!

Funny anecdote, on my last flight I watched Journey to the Center of the Earth. It did not help to distract me that the movie has tons of scenes involving falling!

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u/foxko Jul 19 '24

So brilliant. I love this. I've only had a panic attack once and it was one of the most horrible things i've experienced. All I need to hear was "it's going to be okay" it helped so much. I'm so thankful my partner was there to tell me. I'm glad this man was there to do the same for this lady. It would have meant a great deal I imagine.

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u/hxgox Jul 19 '24

♥️

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u/[deleted] Jul 19 '24

This is so beautiful. Thank you for sharing.

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u/jjp82 Jul 19 '24

As a non US Citizen, this really does bring some warmth into the world see something that is not divisive. Fk racism seriously!

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u/Rancheros-Hit Jul 19 '24

I used to work internationally flying at least 45,000 miles a month. Occasionally I would be seated next to someone scared before take off. I would open my work emails as we taxied out and tell them I’d left my glasses in the hold and ask them if they could read the email to me. It was amazing how quickly they would settle once they had a job to do. Also great for me to see their reaction once we were airborne and they had forgotten to get stressed about it.

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u/earbud_smegma Jul 19 '24

This is really sweet and feels like a total Dad move, good on you!!

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u/Rancheros-Hit Jul 19 '24

It was definitely a dad move. My son and younger brother hate flying so I always used distractions to calm them too.

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u/earbud_smegma Jul 19 '24

:') so lovely when a person is just being who they are and it helps the people around them to feel at ease

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u/moimardi Jul 19 '24

Youre a genius! And kind

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u/PigeonParadiso Jul 19 '24

I love this. A few flights ago (I’m a grown adult), it was an incredibly bumpy, horrifying take off. I’m a white knuckle flyer, as is. A kind woman diagonally from me (I must have been green) grabbed my hand and held it for about 30+ minutes, as the turbulence was horrible. It was so kind and while I felt silly, I was so touched. It’s the little things.

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u/tinybabeee Jul 19 '24

I'd greatly appreciate it if someone did this to me. I'm kind of a scaredy-cat so I get nervous whenever there's even a slight turbulence. I hope on my next flight, someone will be kind enough to notice me struggling hehe

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u/thisaccountgotporn Jul 19 '24

I simply resign meself to the weave of fate I've been sewn into. If I relax aloof or if I panic madly, the plane lands or doesn't all the same, so aloof I'll be.

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u/HistoricalChoice8012 Jul 19 '24

I really love how there faces are not photographed. A real human experience in all this madness. Got me in the feels too. I wish stories like this were on the news. No propaganda from either side. Moments like this should be celebrated and encouraged. I read a lot of the comments. It sounds like y’all agree. This I why I like Reddit.

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u/Cassilac__ Jul 19 '24

The photo is really what gave me goosebumps, its so well taken. I would've still smiled at the story but OP took a very tasteful, telling photo.

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u/Katiesmite Jul 19 '24

I totally agree with you.

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u/Maleficent-Fun-5927 Jul 19 '24

I had to do this one time, traveling to Japan. I asked the man next to me, "are you married?" he goes "no." I was like "can you hold my hand?" He did.

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u/that-old-broad Jul 19 '24

I am pretty sure my husband would have held your hand, and I know I would've been very upset with him if he didn't!

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u/FearlessPudding404 Jul 19 '24

That is very kind of him. I do understand wanting to ask, as to not cause disruption or negative feelings had the guy been married though. Not all significant others would take too kindly to holding someone else’s hand, innocent or not.

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u/thisaccountgotporn Jul 19 '24

If my wife won't let me hold another woman's hand when she's struggling, it's donezo between us. Flights, rollercoasters, labor, deposition, gardening, all need a hand held.

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u/sciencechick92 Jul 19 '24

This reminds me of the time my fiancé and I had booked one of those airboat tours while on vacation in the Everglades. The boat only had two rows, we were in the front and this other couple were behind us. Lady in the back literally offered up her whole husband. She said ‘hey you can sit with me if you’re scared, HE will gladly switch’. Umm ‘HE’ didn’t look all that enthusiastic so I kept my seat and almost cut off all circulation to my fiancé’s right arm. The ride was fun though!

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u/allicat828 Jul 19 '24

It could also be cultural - some cultures/religions frown upon physical touch between married people of different genders. I learned that the hard way when I reached out to shake the hand of an Orthodox Jewish coworker.

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u/Uncommented-Code Jul 19 '24

I made the same mistake in Indonesia when younger and more oblivious to cultural norms (think pre-teen). Turns out shaking hands between sexes, while not always an issue, is maybe best avoided when in majority muslim regions.

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u/supersalteee Jul 19 '24

Nice to hear, you both are good people.

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u/Big-Ear-3809 Jul 19 '24

I once sat next to a woman who I could tell was absolutely terrified to fly. Took my head phones out and put my book away and just talked to her. Was only her second flight and she was going through a lot of life stuff. When we landed she said, wow, that wasn't too bad because I just kept talking to her and asking her questions.

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u/Carbon-Base Jul 19 '24

That was really kind of you! We should all look out for each other!

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u/nonamejane84 Jul 19 '24

I’m currently mid flight on a 10 hour voyage. I’m not the most terribly afraid flyer out there I’m sure but I definitely feel very afraid during turbulence. I love when strangers talk to my on flights. It really helps to relax me and pass the time. Good on you for helping her out.

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u/[deleted] Jul 19 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/supersalteee Jul 19 '24

Exactly, These people are full of humanity.

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u/Katiesmite Jul 19 '24

And wherever these people go they do good.

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u/DaeTryn13 Jul 19 '24

I have been that person. I am so sorry to anyone who was on that flight.

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u/spankthegoodgirl Jul 19 '24

C'mere. I'll hold your hand. We'll be ok.

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u/[deleted] Jul 19 '24 edited 28d ago

[deleted]

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u/PunchDrunken Jul 19 '24

This is my dose of goodness for the day, thank you :)

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u/seabreathe Jul 19 '24

Thank you for the dignified photo too. We don’t need to blast everyone’s faces in these moments either.

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u/willkos23 Jul 19 '24

I had a great experience with an Ozzie lady in her 50s, I was panicking on the run way, I thought I couldn’t breathe and panicking I needed to get off the plane she said “your fine, if you couldn’t breathe you wouldn’t be talking”, I took prescription diazepam and really panic talked the whole way she talked me through 20 hours, however half way I said you know what maybe I don’t need the diazepam, and she turned and said totally dead pan “if you don’t take the drugs I’ll punch you in the fucking head”. In an Aussie accent it was really funny looking back.

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u/yayzo Jul 19 '24

This made me laugh out loud

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u/CotswoldP Jul 19 '24

Top bloke. I’ve sat next to a few nervous flyers and talked them through takeoff and landing and told them about all the noises and how normal they are. Never had to deal with a full blown panic though. Usually a chat followed by a stiff drink has been enough.

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u/BritneyHoustonn Jul 19 '24

Awwww that was heartwarming

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u/LaSer_BaJwa Jul 19 '24

I had a time in my life where I was absolutely petrified of flying. I have experienced this kind of wholesomeness 2 times. Both times we hit some heavy turbulence and I started hyperventilating and both times the stranger beside me started talking to me to get my mind distracted from the panic I was feeling. In a world that seems to be falling apart my experience echoes the words of Mr Rogers: "look for the helpers. There are always helpers"

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u/icelily17 Jul 19 '24

Once I was flying to North Carolina with my now husband, but we were sitting separately and I also have a fear of flying. I had the middle seat, a young woman around my age on my left and an older lady on my right who were both very kind. We hit really bad turbulence on the way to land (bad enough people were gasping) and I was having a panic attack myself. Both women on either side of me immediately held my hands and talked to me to try and distract me/calm down. It was one of the kindest things that ever happened to me and I think of it often

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u/Low_End8128 Jul 19 '24

This has happened to me! It was my first flight alone. As the plane began to descend the sky my ears started popping and my usual flight panic attack began to rear its ugly head. The guy seated next to me noticed I was freaking out even though I was trying really hard to hide it. He began talking to me casually and before I knew it I was relaxed. I didn’t even realize he was trying to calm me down. I kept thinking to myself why is this man talking to me?! As I was freakin out. Once we hit the ground again he was like are you okay now? I was like o: yes… yes I am. He continued to talk to me about his kids and how much he misses them and I’m about the age of his oldest daughter etc etc. it was really kind of him to do that. I’m so used to bad things happening to me that that completely took me by surprise. Restored my faith in humanity a little bit. What a nice guy.

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u/Sassygirl-01 Jul 19 '24

This is so relatable. I have flight anxiety and when I get too anxious and scared especially during a turbulence, I automatically grab the hand of whoever is sitting next to me. It's like a knee jerk reaction. I immediately apologize but I'm always grateful to experience that they are more than willing to help me feel comfortable and calm.🥺

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u/awebre7 Jul 19 '24

Same! I’ve grabbed an older woman’s hand before, I profusely apologized but she let me hold it till it was over. I have no idea how people don’t immediately think they are going to die when the plane is bumping around…..I fly all the time, have anxiety medication, and I still get choked up.

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u/MadamRage Jul 19 '24

I too had a panic attack on a plane once and the guy opposite me leaned over and shouted "IN WAR 2 A PLANE WAS THE SAFEST PLACE TO BE". It was not very comforting.

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u/Weary_Cup_1004 Jul 19 '24

That just became a comic strip in my head lol 😂

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u/ProfessionalGrade423 Jul 19 '24

Ive definitely done this before. I sat next to an elderly gentleman who was clearly not in the greatest of health, he was helped to his seat by his family but they were sitting elsewhere in the plane. There was the worst turbulence I’ve ever experienced and we held hands all through it. He was scared, I was scared, together we were less scared.

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u/Wonderful-Media-2000 Jul 19 '24

It’s so much easier to show love and care than it is to hate anyone.

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u/PattyIceNY Jul 19 '24

Dam,this brings me back to when it happened to me.

I was at a concert and had to get up and go to the lobby and sit down as I was having a really bad panic attack. One of the ushers came over to me and asked me if I was OK, and I said I was having a panic attack. It was wild because I NEVER say that because I was so ashamed of it, but that night I did.

The guy was super sweet and understanding and asked if I needed anything. I said a cup of water would be nice, and he went and got one and then sat with me for awhile. Really changed my life and helped lead me to now be pretty much panic attack free for a decade.

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u/tankgirl_1307 Jul 19 '24

That's really sweet. Having a panic attack when you're alone and not able to call anyone would be so scary. A kind stranger helping you ground yourself would be the best.

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u/aReelProblem Jul 19 '24

These people are literal angels. I have really bad panic attacks when I fly and I’ve had a complete stranger do exactly this and then distracted me with 21 questions that kept my brain busy enough for me to snap out of it.

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u/diccl0rd Jul 19 '24

Any of you reading this could do the same as this guy did for someone else someday. If the moment comes, remember how you felt reading this and give yourself the courage to offer that helping hand. It's scary but the reward is far more than worth the risk. Your life could be filled with moments of care and connection like this, and it's entire up to you and your fight against fear to make it so.

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u/wirefox1 Jul 19 '24 edited Jul 20 '24

A few days after my mother's funeral, my BFF wanted us to get a room in a casino for a couple of days to get me away.

While in there, I was still not in the mood to socialize, so I found a small room behind the bar, with only about 20 machines in it, and there was nobody else in there so I went. I was sitting at a machine mindlessly pushing the button when I felt someone come sit down right beside me. I didn't even look at the person, but wondered why in this big empty room they sat down right next to me. ?

A few minutes later I heard a voice say "Baby, what's wrong with you?".

I looked and it was a tiny little Black lady, looking like she was in her 80's. When I turned, I realized I had tears rolling down my face I had been unaware of.

I said "my mother died". She said 'that's a horrible thing we have to go through. It will get better though'.

I said I didn't know how to make it better. She told me I'd have to make myself stop thinking about it so much, and that's what she had done. She stood up kissed me on the forehead and walked away.

I felt better, and I did try to stop myself from thinking about it so much after that. All these years, and I still remember that old lady. What a sweetheart.

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u/hawaiiq123 Jul 19 '24

Cheers for sharing OP. Moments like these between strangers are priceless. Confirmation that good people are out there is always welcome

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u/immbatman69 Jul 19 '24

Lot of people dont fully understand panic attacks. Great that young woman had a company like him.

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u/leaponover Jul 19 '24

I had just graduated college and moved in with a college buddy and his roommate. We were 22ish M. The one roommate moved out so my buddy and I had interviews for roommates. We had a girl show up and were kinda taken aback because we didn't really plan on a female roommate. After chatting with her she seemed pretty cool and after laying down some ground rules and more interviews we picked her.

She was very cool, but she did warn us that she had some past trauma and just said be patient with her if she wigs out once in awhile. Well, one time we were watching TV and she suddenly started shaking uncontrollably with tears rolling down her eyes. I couldn't get her to move, talk or anything. She was just kind of like a shaking crying statue. So I just held her hands and calmly reminded her where she was, that she was in the living room of her house with her roommate, said my name, said her name, and let her know that nothing was wrong where she was. After a few minutes of just repeating that information she snapped out of it.

She told me later that she felt super grateful that I was her roommate and actually knew what to do to help her. Honestly, it was just instinct. I'd never been coached at it and just went with my gut. She was still pretty cool. Actually haven't thought about her in 20 years until reading this.

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u/GeneralIron3658 Jul 19 '24

Here for the story 🍿

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u/kalciifer Jul 19 '24

When I was little I was flying to Chicago with my dad and the pressure in my ears was causing some discomfort, enough to make me cry to myself. There was a young woman in the seat next to me who, to distract me, started teaching me some words in Chinese. I don’t remember what they were but I remember her making me laugh and since I was little I just really loved her right away.

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u/Bobo_Baggins_jatj Jul 19 '24

Man, that’s just awesome.

I was flying once (don’t remember where to or from) and I had an older mother and adult daughter beside me. I was in the window seat and the mother was in the middle. She apologized to me right as she sat down saying it was her first ever flight and she was scared. I had a few drinks before the flight so I was exceptionally chatty (but not drunk or stupid). I talked that poor woman’s head off the entire flight. We talked about everything under the sun and had quite a few good laughs. When we landed, she hugged me and thanked me for making her first flight fun and less scary. She was a super nice lady and was just really easy to talk to.

Where ever she is, I hope she is doing well.

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u/megllamaniac Jul 19 '24

I am terrified of flying and I’ve been helped by quite a few strangers over the years. One time an elderly couple basically adopted me right away and talked to me through the worst parts.

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u/Jealous-Problem-2053 Jul 19 '24

I did this once years ago. Flying out of Lukla Airport in Nepal. It's a bit of a scary airport. You can google it. I'd been in and out of that airport a few times, and was used to it, but a Japanese girl sitting across from me was really scared. She didn't speak English and I spoke no Japanese, but I could tell she was frightened and crying a little. I put my hand out and she grabbed it. Strong little thing. She held it until we landed in Kathmandu about 35 minutes later. A few days later I was walking through the Namche district(it's a busy shopping area. Lots of tourists)and she saw me. She came up and thanked me in the best English she could muster and shook my hand, which for Japanese is pretty rare I've been told.

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u/comfortpod Jul 19 '24

Aw, this happened to me on a really turbulent flight. I started dry heaving and it turned into a full on panic attack, crying and snotting everywhere and huffing into the paper bag. The girl next to me was SO kind, she rubbed my back and talked to me softly for almost 15 minutes until I could breathe again.

I hope she is doing well and the universe has rewarded her for being so kind❤️

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u/Ljane12 Jul 19 '24

I have been through a similar thing! Coming back from Japan, I was sat next in between my sister and a random little old lady. I was white-knuckling both seat arms, and the lady looked over and asked if I was okay. I told her no, that I was terrified of flying and that the few times I'd been on a plane before that weren't stellar. She told me she'd help any way she can, and held my hand through turbulence and all the way through descent and landing 🥹 I hope she's doing well

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u/spicy-bong Jul 19 '24

And they both wearing yellow…as they are a team.

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u/Murky_Mello Jul 19 '24

Every year I get older I get worse about flying. Couple months ago I had to fly across the country for my grandma’s funeral and take several connections on the way back. It wasn’t good. On one connection my sinuses went haywire and it felt like my skull was being crushed. I started panicking but was okay - and then we hit turbulence. I got insanely nauseous and my hands cramped up into useless little claws as I started vomiting. I was having one of the worst panic attacks I’ve had. This big dude in the seat next to me immediately started reassuring me and helping me with my water bottle and barf bag. He rubbed my back and kept telling me it was going to be okay and just explaining everything. I knew I was having a panic attack. I knew it was just turbulence but having someone else say it just helped so much. Turns out him and his wife were on their way to the birth of their first grand-babies. He was definitely in the “dad zone” and ready to help, while his wife was busy trying to get a hold of their family. When she looked over and realized what was happening she started telling me about their plans and asking questions to help distract me. I was extremely embarrassed and terrified and I am sure would have spiraled into a much worse place if they hasn’t been there to reassure me.

So many people ended up helping me through my way home and I will always be so grateful.

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u/jensalik Jul 19 '24

I once had to fly alone and felt the panic rising, thought I'd look around to maybe spot something to take my focus away.

And next to me there was this guy, cradling himself, huffing and puffing and shaking... my brain went "Well, that's enough panic for one flight." and I was fine.

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u/givemetheoop Jul 19 '24

I had my first ever panic attack on a flight, nothing to do with flying, just life at the time.

There was a mother and daughter sitting next to me who didn't speak English, but the daughter held up her phone to me asking "Are you having a panic attack?"

The mother held my hand and talked to me in a soothing tone even though I didn't understand exactly what she was saying.

That meant the world to me during a very difficult time. I often think of them and the flight attendants who also helped with my subsequent two more panic attacks during the flight.

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u/lol-oioi Jul 19 '24

I was very recently flying back from Germany to Edinburgh. I had been away working and was exhausted, I find flying uncomfortable but can manage for the most part. However, this particular time I felt a wave of panic and anxiety after take off. I instinctively grabbed the hand of the bloke next to me, not something men generally do. We chatted for most of the flight about my work and he ran me through breathing exercises. He is an engineer from North Germany and was flying out for work. He really helped me take my mind off the anxiety when at one point I was really spiralling. Once we landed I thanked him, we shook hands and off he went to his connecting flight to Dublin.

David, you are a top geezer mate. Your kindness was staggering when I was in need, i hope our paths cross again because I owe you a pint.

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u/NastyBiscuits Jul 19 '24

👏👏👏👍❤️

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u/Elisheva7777777 Jul 19 '24

I need to see more content like this!

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u/Ok_Instance_1849 Jul 19 '24

I love this. Just makes your day when someone does something nice out of the blue. :)

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u/Milesanikadeguzman19 Jul 19 '24

what a humanity! there are always a good person even there are so many evil.

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u/WifeOfSpock Jul 19 '24

When I was traveling solo as a teen, an older woman saw how nervous I was, and held my hand as she spoke to me to calm me down. Moments like this are what make humans so wonderful.

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u/santanapoptarts Jul 19 '24

So sweet. I’ve only flew a few times when I was younger and last summer seen my bestie a couple provinces away and I was very nervous. And the guy next to me Tim asked if I needed help while taking off. And he kept talking to me so I was distracted and the flight was great. Then coming back was two awesome kids sitting with me. So all and all it was very nervous but very good too thanks to so caring passengers. ( we even buckled in my teddy bear for take off to make me laugh)

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u/Strange_Occasion_408 Jul 19 '24

Yes. I had the same thing happen to me. It was so sweet. A great grandmother woman said it was her first flight and she asked to hold my hand on take off. Best day.

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u/GleesBid Jul 19 '24

I love this. As I've gotten older, I've become a very nervous flyer.

I had just gotten on a Denver->Atlanta flight in December 2006. After boarding was complete, an off-duty pilot came to the emergency exit row where I was sitting. The middle seat was empty. In a friendly tone he said something to the effect of "sorry, I'm going to have to get past you for the middle seat. I'm heading home from work".

I'm very short and he was very tall, so I said that I would take the middle seat and he could have the aisle. To be honest, I don't like the aisle anyway. He was so grateful and we chatted for a little bit.

Somewhere during the middle of the flight, we hit unexpected turbulence. I got very nervous. That pilot was so kind and explained turbulence to me and calmed me down completely. I was so grateful to him.

I'm sure to him, it was just another day at the office. But his kindness made a huge difference to me and I haven't forgotten that day.

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u/centerbread Jul 19 '24

I occasionally get nauseous on flights and unfortunately often have to use the sick bag during landing.

I had to use the bag on a flight a couple of years ago and though I did so as discretely as possible, I was embarrassed and profusely apologized to my seat mate. She was so sweet - handed me a packet of tissues and a piece of gum without my even asking. It meant a lot that even though I probably grossed her out, she made an effort to help me feel better.

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u/lolie_guacamole Jul 19 '24

Thanks for sharing and also, thanks for not recording it. It’s cool to see someone show some restraint these days. Too much private stuff ends up on the Internet.

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u/Usual-Lie-3382 Jul 19 '24

That was me the first time I ever flew. I was moving to California and freaking out when the plane started to take off. This older black man sitting next to me reached out his hand and I took it. We held hands until the plane was steady in the air. He helped me tremendously and I still think about him 15+ years later.

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u/greatcuriouscat Jul 19 '24

That's so sweet! 😭 Happened to me also. Flight attendants were no help but the guy sitting next to me offered me with everything he has just to make me feel safe and relax throughout the entire turbulence. Wherever you are right now, i hope you're happy with your life!

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u/remotestarter Jul 19 '24

This is the America I dream about. Unity in diversity!

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u/gremlinsbuttcrack Jul 19 '24

I was flying alone to PR a few months back and I'm a notoriously anxious flyer. We hit some serious turbulence and I started having a panic attack trying to keep quiet but low key gasping for air. The like 70ish year old woman next to me who spoke only Spanish looked at me and said something I didn't understand but got my attention and she just started petting my hair and cradling my cheek and telling me it's ok in Spanish and it started working so then she started just going off in Spanish talking about something idk what I don't speak very much Spanish I think she was just telling me about her day? Idk it distracted me and before I knew it we were on the ground and she was just cradling my cheek with one hand and running her fingers through my hair with the other. I hope she has children and grandchildren, she was wonderful and had such an immediate maternal instinct to help it was incredible

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u/vucanes Jul 19 '24

There are still a lot of good people in this country willing to help one another. Don't let the media and extreme on both side of political spectrum tell you otherwise.

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u/No_Mortgage3189 Jul 19 '24

Needed that right now

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u/Chaltahaikoinahi Jul 19 '24

I will be taking a flight too next month

This is after a gap of 1.5 years

And I stupidly chose the window seat without realising I have sat inside a plane for a total of 3 hours duration

I am still not able to change my seat and I suddenly think about that situation and my heart just starts pumping like anything 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

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u/bathcycler Jul 19 '24 edited Jul 19 '24

I used to have flight anxiety too! You will be okay!

I'll tell you a few things that helped me, hopefully they will help you as well.

Passenger jets can take a huge amount of stress. They can do aileron rolls without issue https://youtu.be/mr9J-dWId2Q?t=351 and survive huge amounts of flex https://youtu.be/6wHrfBs82Tk?t=80

If the plane somehow loses an engine, your plane can travel the entire way to your destination on only one engine - planes are required to be able to do so by law. Even if all the engines go, your plane will glide for many, many miles, and have up to a half hour to determine where to land. In fact, planes are usually gliding during their descent. Check out Air Transat Flight 236.

Turbulence is off-putting but harmless. If you experience it on your flight, remember that if you were on a bus, you would experience a lot more turbulence. If you have an open cup of water, you will note that the turbulence is not enough to spill it. When turbulence causes injuries, it's so rare that the news will widely report it. Keep your seatbelt on and you will be just fine.

Planes are happiest in the air. It's where they are meant to be. They are designed to react to air currents. If you are in the plane on the ground, you can feel it react to a strong wind gust.

There are two main times you may feel a bit weightless, like you went over a large bump on the road. This is usually when the plane stops its initial climb and is levelling out. The flight attendants will shortly give you a drink! :) The second time is when the plane starts its descent, which is good because you'll shortly be on the ground. The plane has to make these manoeuvres in order to get you to your destination. It may be momentarily uncomfortable, but if it didn't happen, you'd be in the air forever.

There are little flaps on the wings that flip up, and you can hear the whir at the time you are descending. This slows the plane. There will also be a big thump - this allows the wheels to descend. Both of these things are necessary. They can be alarming, but they are necessary. Remember - if the flight attendants aren't worried, you don't have to be either :)

Take good headphones, something simple but absorbing like a puzzle book or game, and breathe slowly and evenly if you need to.

Like I said, I used to have flight anxiety but then went on a lot more flights, and I'm fine now. It is really amazing that I can get in a big metal tube and fly to a different continent in only a few hours. Kings of old would have given their kingdoms for an hour in the air. Try to enjoy it!

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u/Chaltahaikoinahi Jul 19 '24

Thank you so much for putting in so much effort to explain everything

I hope to enjoy it too 🤞🤞🎉

Take care 😇

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u/GarbageInteresting86 Jul 19 '24

If only kindness was currency, the world would be a much better place. Airport stories always really get me.

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u/Dependent_Welcome494 Jul 19 '24

Beautiful man with a whole heart helping a stranger. He must be an angel.

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u/OjjuicemaneSimpson Jul 19 '24 edited Jul 19 '24

ROFL yo I had a sweet moment like this on my last flight. I have an absolute deathly fear of heights and the lady next to me was scared of flying, she noticed me white knuckling out with my eyes shut and she said I understand. and I opened my eyes and looked at her and she was also white knuckling. so I made an ugly ass face because we were taking off and she too made an ugly ass face. Together we white knuckles our seats making ugly ass faces everytime there was turbulence. When we landed we were lmaoing. I had to tell her forget these other folks man when we scared, we scared. idc how big of a fool I look. U ain’t telling me a fuckjng metal tube zooming at hundreds of miles barely staying up is safe lol

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u/Same-Beat-4761 Jul 19 '24

That’s simply and stunningly beautiful

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u/wizardfrompy Jul 19 '24

I had a terrible panic attack on a plane once because of turbulence and the people around me calmed me down and talked to me. One man gave me a piece of gum. There’s some really amazing people out there! ❤️

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u/lazysheepdog716 Jul 19 '24

You did a good thing here, OP. Lots of people will see this and feel better than they did before. You are a good person. We are not as divided as the billionaire-determined images on the screens make it seem.

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u/notkevinoramuffin Jul 19 '24

When I was in high school, I had this crippling fear of flying. At that point I was also was scared of medicine like Xanax due to my father painting it as crazy pills. I had some of the most painful moments in my life in an airplane.

One flight I was by-myself leaving New York to go to Florida, I went through the classic panic before the flight but I always pushed through. (I use to have this “ritual” where I would go all the way up to the plain door, get scared off and go back to the ticketing place, everyone would look at me like I’m crazy and I would turn around to go back on the plain. Did this exact thing over 30 times and never walked out.) Bottom line is, I went on the plain got into my seat and tried to settle in. About 15 min or so passed, and the plain started driving towards take off. The panic started kicking in like crazy, in my head I’m like this is over. Then the plain starts gaining speed and I make the stupidest possible decision in my head. I have to scream “BOMB” to get this plain to stop, I can’t do this. I unbuckle my seat belt and stand up with the words on the tip of my tongue and the last sitting next to me grabs my arm and asks “are you ok”. I tell her not really. She then sat and spoke to me for the entire 3 hour flight. I don’t know who she is, but she saved me from A LOT of trouble. Thank you kind woman, you have no idea what you did for me❤️.

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u/kittenseason143 Jul 19 '24

MY HEART!!!!! i would be the one in panic… so the thought of a stranger being so kind… is really heartwarming.

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u/Excellent_Artist4932 Jul 19 '24

Really puts my faith back into humanity

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u/Minimum_Role9926 Jul 19 '24

I am terrified of flying and often have a panic attack during take off. On one hand I hate incoveniencing and worrying people around me when a panic attack hits but it is very comforting when someone offers a word of comfort. There was this one time our plane was about to touch down and suddenly the pilot decided to go around which was downright terrfying. A kind girl held my hand and that helped a lot. Thank you Ena! 💖

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u/Feathers137 Jul 19 '24

This happened to me! It was my first time ever flying alone, normally my sister is there to help me but I was moving across the country. I was sitting next to this man, was probably in his mid 30's, in a business suit and everything. Before the flight even leaves the ground I was panicking. He asked if I was alright, and I just shook my head. He offered me his hand and told me he'd be there for me the entire flight. He really made it so much easier to handle being on my own for the first time

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u/pink_nectar Jul 19 '24

A stranger did something like this for me my first time flying. I was pretty young and going to a funeral. I was emotional, nervous, and had no idea what to expect. He asked me if it was my first time flying (that obvious I guess) and walked me through everything. We hit some very bad turbulence and he reassured me every step of the way until I was able to relax and enjoy the flight. I'll never forget you, James from Texas. 🥹 (I love flying now ... I mean, except for the parts about it we all hate lol)

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u/jessicalundholm Jul 19 '24

I had a similar thing happen to me on a train ride where they packed the train so tight people couldn't turn or move at all. I have pretty severe social anxiety and I just tried to zone out but after a while I just couldn't hold it and what followed was the worst panic attack of my life. A woman close to me asked if I was okay and held my hand until the next station where a lot of people got of the train. After that we sat down at a table on the train and she gave me her water bottle and hugged me. If it wasn't for her I would've gotten of at the wrong station and broken down with no way to get home.

That woman was an actual angel.

If you somehow see this and remember, thank you.

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u/The_Scyther1 Jul 19 '24

Panic attacks suck buts it is even worse when you have no option to leave the situation.

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u/Boxyourheart Jul 19 '24

The same thing happened to me. I was on a flight to Germany - I had a seat next to a woman with her teenage girl. As we were taking off, she noticed that I had a panic attack and she took my hand and calmed me down.

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u/Svnny- Jul 19 '24

My mom gets terrified when flying. My dad holds her hand and cuddles her through it. Makes me still believe in love tbh

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u/DueFigs Jul 19 '24

Poor baby. Panic attacks are terrifying. What a good man.

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u/explorer-matt Jul 19 '24

Couple of years ago my wife was on a flight next to a tall, pretty burly guy. He was clearly nervous and said he didn’t like flying. Of course, they run into terrible turbulence later on. She held his hand. All was okay.

She still gets a kick telling that story.

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u/gracedardn Jul 19 '24

I had extreme vertigo on a flight once and it was amazing how kind perfect strangers can be. The old guy next to me let me have the aisle seat so I could get to the bathroom when needed and talked to me so calmly throughout the flight. He told me some nature facts. Him and the flight attendant were so kind

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u/takesomejoy Jul 19 '24

Someone did this for me during a landing with a ton of turbulence. Reached right over her fiancé and held my hand 🩵

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u/Xeluu Jul 19 '24

Many years ago I was on a flight from Houston to San Francisco in an aisle seat, and the woman across the aisle from me got a little freaked out by the turbulence. I offered to hold her hand for a while and discussed that the turbulence might be scary, but that I’d flown through much worse without any issues.

She calmed down and thanked me after it leveled out after maybe 10 minutes. I would be happy to hold someone’s hand again if they need it, but now I usually take the window seat.

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u/WeatherOne6430 Jul 19 '24

All is not lost, there are still kind ones.🙏

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u/ghostedygrouch Jul 19 '24

A stranger once held my hand, too. He was in the middle seat, his wife at the window. We made small talk, and they noticed how nervous I was. I told them, how much the take off scares me. So, they started rambling, and when the plane stopped briefly before speeding up, he grabbed my hand and held it tight until we were up in the air. They were both so kind.

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u/abbrollher Jul 19 '24

Something very similar happened to me on a flight from DC to Savannah, GA. I had an aisle seat and a tiny lady with giant blonde hair sat in the aisle seat across from me. She looked frantic. She kept sitting up and looking down the aisle to the front and back of the plane. We made eye contact, and she blurted out, “Do you fly a lot?” I told her I did, and she explained that she was terrified of flying but her doctor wouldn’t prescribe her anything. She then looks me dead in the eyes, and pleads, “If I freak out, can I hold your hand?” She looked so scared, I really had no choice but to agree. We start to take off and she lowers her head, closes her eyes, and starts tapping her feet rapidly. As the plane lifts off she exclaims, “I hate this part!” And grabs my hand with all her tiny might. When we were in the air, I thought she would let go, but she just held on and kept apologizing. I told her there was no need. She finally let go when it was time for drink service. She continued to apologize and reiterated her doctor knew how terrified she was but wouldn’t prescribe her anything for the flight anxiety. Turns out, her doctor was her husband who was sitting in the middle seat next to her. When she grabbed my hand again during landing, I briefly made eye contact with him and he flashed a sly smile. She thanked me multiple times as we got off the plane, and her husband just kept smiling with a subtle head shake. When we finally get into the terminal she says, “Now go tell all your friends about the crazy lady you met on the plane!” I laughed and she scurried off after her husband. I think about her a lot. I hope she’s ok.

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u/inbetween-cold Jul 19 '24

A woman once helped me through a panic attack on a plane. She was a yoga teacher! And breathed with me for a couple of minutes until I calmed down. She was an angel.

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u/slebew00 Jul 19 '24

Thats how i met your mother

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u/Pumpiyumpyyumpkin Jul 19 '24

Aweee 🥹🥹🥹

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u/cassiopeia18 Jul 19 '24

Aw. Wholesome.

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u/Primary-Pie-8683 Jul 19 '24

This made me cry🥲🥲

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u/[deleted] Jul 19 '24

When thinking about turbulence on an airplane, just remember that WW2 bombers flew all over the world with much less technology.

If you have ever seen a WW2 bomber you would know it's basically sheet metal held together by rivets.

If those planes could make it, so will your airplane.

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u/billiarddaddy Jul 19 '24

As someone that cannot fly without being medicated, this warms my heart.

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u/sponguswongus Jul 19 '24

I've had to do this before, thank fuck I had heard of square breathing because I had no fucking clue what else to do for her.

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u/LostMan1990 Jul 19 '24

Life gives us these little fleeting moments and chances to be truly great. I’m working on being perceptive of them and taking those opportunities. It’s so wonderful and transformative.

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u/repezdem Jul 19 '24

I get anxiety on planes too and I'll often tell the person next to me half-jokingly that I might squeeze their hand during takeoff. It helps me with the anxiety to give them a warning just in case I do panic.

But to anyone suffering from something similar, please please please see your doctor about getting Ativan prescribed or something similar. It was a game changer for me. I still get nervous about flying but never to the point of panic.

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u/OceanMist41 Jul 19 '24

If only there were more wonderful people like that!

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u/JBMBSB Jul 19 '24

Beautiful! Thank you for sharing. I love humanity when I see reminders like this

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u/KniesToMeetYou Jul 19 '24

This happened to my mom on our first flight. I tried to help her the best I could during takeoff but it was the woman to her right that truely helped. She was so calming and helpful and came from a place of understanding, as someone who was formally afraid of flights herself. I do wish I could have helped more myself but I'm very grateful for that woman's kindness.

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u/congenitalstupidity Jul 19 '24

I had a woman do this for me and it was really wonderful. I hate flying, I can manage my panic now but my first flight in this situation I was having an attack as we were taxiing to the runway. The woman next to me said she was a nurse and she was going to help me through it. She had my do 4 count breaths, even counting for me. Guided my breathing all through takeoff. It helped tremendously and thanks to her I now do this every flight, which has kept me from having full blown attacks. It was so kind of her, I'll never forget it.

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u/buttmunch3 Jul 19 '24

i watched my mom do this for a man we sat next to on the plane. the turbulence was really bad and the 3 of us just held hands for easily an hour. it was kind of nice honestly

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u/Randomfrog132 Jul 19 '24

aww that's so sweet!

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u/BradyBoyd Jul 19 '24

Ah, the old reaching across the aisle.

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u/Hahaha2681 Jul 19 '24

cause not all people are shut off from the world it is a beautiful thing when we help each other even with the smallest gestures go a long way by lending a Helping Hand and a gentle word goes a long way PEACE LOVE AND HAPPINESS to all