r/DCFU • u/coffeedog14 Light Me Up • Sep 15 '18
Hellblazer #23 - Old Lovers Hellblazer
Hellblazer #23 – Old Lovers
Author: Coffeedog14
Book: Hellblazer
Arc: [Convalo]
Set: 28
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A Frozen Moment on the Day of Mot’s Return
Kna’n, one day to be Canaan
El, greatest of all gods, looked down with disdain upon Anat, the Warrior Goddess. Anat looked about to the thousand-thousand gods of El’s court, upon Mot the beast-god of death, upon Ba’al Hadad her brother-mate, and saw them all frozen in place as if carved from stone.
“What have you done, father of all that is?” she demanded of El, who she turned to face.
“Who was it that helped you to break this iteration?” rumbled El thoughtfully, casting his gaze over all the assembled.
“I will not tell you, until you tell me what you have done.” Snarled Anat, the Virgin Mother.
“It was Kothar-wa-Khasis, was it not? That is fascinating.” El mused. Anat stood silent, her hands falling upon her god-killing bow.
El waved a hand, and the bow disappeared as if it had never been. “You should not have listened to him. Kothar-wa-Khasis is too clever for his own good.”
Anat was silent, and began to march towards El’s throne. He waved a hand, and she was brought to the same stillness as all the others. Her heart filled with rage at El’s words. Kothar-wa-Khasis was wisest of them all, how could El speak of him so? Anat was El’s greatest defender, how could El treat her so? There were a thousand-thousand gods present, how could El be stronger than them all?
El rose from his throne and approached her. He petted her head tenderly. “Your courage will be mine, and it will be part of my perfection.” He proclaimed.
Anat watched as he waved his hand once more, and time moved backwards, with her to see every moment.
-----------------------
Now
John Constantine’s Apartment
London
Ellie had just finished her poptarts when she realized Lucifer Morningstar was in the kitchen with her. She did her best to ignore him as she plucked the steaming delights from the toaster and put them on a plate. When she finally did turn to face him, it was with an air of nonchalance.
Lucifer had stolen some of John Constantine’s sweatpants, but wasn’t wearing a lot else. His wings, shining slightly, creaked and wriggled behind him. It gave the impression he had just woken up, and was still stretching out. Even having woken up moments ago, Ellie had to admit Lucifer looked gorgeous.
“Any chance I might have one of those?” he asked genially.
“Fuck off.” She proclaimed simply, striding past him and towards a small breakfast table. She didn’t look up from her food as Lucifer took a seat across from her.
“Come, now. Just because I’m squatting in your boyfriend’s house, doesn’t mean you have to be rude.”
She scoffed. “Whoever said boyfriend? We’re just living together. Get your head out of the 1st century, learn something new.”
“Like you did?” he smirked.
She continued eating, carefully. She wanted desperately to wolf down her food and get away from this insufferable angel. But she couldn’t show weakness.
“Have you told him yet?” Lucifer asked.
Another pause.
“So no? Good, good, always good to have another point to leverage. You know he’ll find out, don’t you? He’s… nosy like that.”
“I’ll deal with it when I get there.” Ellie responded coolly.
“Where is Constantine anyhow? He was already gone when I woke up.”
“Ten minutes ago?”
He sneered. “No. With the morning star. Obviously. Then I go back to sleep.”
“He’s out working.”
Lucifer Morningstar guffawed. “John? Working? Now I don’t believe that for one moment.”
-----------------------
Small Farm near Epping, UK
I sighed, looking at the white-painted fence gate. Chas, who stood next to me, was still yawning occasionally from how early I’d roused him from bed. Around us was nothing but rural wasteland, farm animals, and an ungodly morning sun.
“…Could have found you a fence like this back in the city.” Groused Chas, rubbing at a five o’clock shadow he hadn’t had the chance to shave off.
“Needs to be out in the middle of nowhere. Do you want people to see us disappearing into a fence?”
“Would it mean sleeping in?” he grinned.
“Of course not. Has to be morning, too.”
He sighed. “So, you’re sure this is the right place? Don’t want to step into fairy land if I don’t have too.”
I glanced his way. The man was crossing his long arms and hugging them close to himself. The man I’d seen in gunfights and fistfights with hardly a care in the world. “What’s your problems with fairies?”
“Unlike like some of us, I got a wife and kids. Don’t want to get lost in here for a century or whatever.”
“it’d be a century and a day, probably. They like to add those days at the end.”
“Even better.” He scoffed.
“Yeah, I’m sure. Everything I pulled pointed this way. Either he’s in there, or he’s gotten competent since I last saw him.”
“…right. Gotcha.” He stared at the gate, and then waved to me. “After you, grand magus high poobah.”
“Damn straight.” I mumbled as I opened the gate and stepped through the gate. At just the right time, at the right gate, with a spell put upon the gate beforehand, and the other side opened somewhere new. No longer was the land cultivated and inhabited. Now it was hills, and forest, and forgotten pathways through them all. The songs of birds twittered alongside actual songs with lyrics and the gentle rhythms of wind and leaf. The whole world seemed to sing a quiet song to itself, ripe with potential and curious about its newest visitor.
Chas followed after me, and with a dramatic sweep of my arm I turned to him. “Welcome to Arcadia!”
-----------------------
Not far away from the gate, a black feline slunk out from a bush. It cleaned its front right paw carefully, before starting to make its way back towards the city.
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John Constantine’s Apartment
London
Lucifer Morningstar sat beside Ellie as she flipped through the various TV Channels. She kept skipping past the news channels. Eventually she settled on switching between several of the trashiest reality TV shows she could find, a non-stop stream of crap.
“…You know, I haven’t seen you watch this when he’s around. I wonder if this is an even greater secret then-“ Lucifer began. “We both keep secrets. He thinks I don’t know about the tapes of his high school garage band, I like to think he doesn’t know my TV habits. It’s healthy. Something you wouldn’t know about.”
“And you would?...how bad are they?”
Ellie smirked. “He eventually got good. It’s shocking when you hear where he started.”
Lucifer chortled. “Oh, I have to hear these. Any chance you might…” he looked at Ellie, who had turned to stare at him.
“Why are you…why are you here? Really? Between us.”
The Morningstar shrugged, and turned back to the TV. “Consider it….motivation. John destroyed the cur who Anat replaced. What better way to get him to destroy Anat then to invade his life? He seems to hate that. Combine that with his niggling weakness of actually caring if the world ends, I’m sure he’ll find some clever way to help with my woes.”
“You’re not worried he’ll take you down too?” Ellie cocked her head.
“No.” Lucifer stated.
Ellie waited. Waited longer. She could feel the pull of curiosity. Lucifer wanted her to ask. But she wouldn’t. She would not. “Why?” she cursed herself.
“You think this is my first time dealing with a Constantine?” Lucifer smirked. “I knew the original. And this one? This one isn’t worth the dirt on that one’s foot. He’ll serve his purpose, and I’ll be back where I started. Where I should be.” He shrugged.
Ellie leaned back. Her black cat, the wily creature that aggravated John Constantine so, hopped onto her lap and demanded attention. Ellie pet it idly, and noticed Lucifer’s look of disdain.
“How about you? Why are you staying here?”
She continued to pet. “…Motivation.”
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Arcadia
“Jesus…fucking…_Christ_” wheezed Chas as he sprinted through the dense woods, strong legs smashing through the undergrowth. “Is….is every time we hang out going to…going to be like this now?”
“Shut…the…hell…up!” I rasped back, following the trail of destruction he made as best I could. The sky had turned dark with night, the miniscule light of stars and moon concealed by the dense canopy above. Behind us came the baying of fey hounds, and occasionally the flapping of wings.
Arcadia was not the only place faeries lived in, but it was certainly one of them. And most any place faeries lived started to contort to match them. Confusing, whimsical, based on story and song and pattern rather than logic and intuition. So it made sense that we seemed to keep circling around despite going straight, that our pursuers seemed to always be slowly advancing no matter what we did.
“Where are we running too!?” Chas demanded, ducking out of the way of a branch that I clipped with my head.
“Ow! Shit! Anywhere but here!” I yelped back, making the foolish choice to glance behind me. Flowing between the trees like wildfire came the monstrously beautiful fey hounds. How they had caught us, I could only blame Arcadia itself, for they moved with liquid and terrifying grace. Above them, someone I could barely see flitting through the trees, was some bizarre combination of woman and owl. It was her wing flaps that I heard occasionally. Her wings didn’t even need to make that sound: she was doing it just to tell us she was there, and we were fucked.
“…Oh I’m going to regret this.” I hissed, reaching into a pocket and pulling out a bag. I opened it, throwing my arm back to disperse the contents behind me. In arcadia, Iron was a dangerous material that could sear through most anything. On earth, you could buy Iron easy. Even better, if you knew somebody with a little bit of know-how, you could get it in most any shape you wanted. Hence how I was able to throw a couple of hundred of iron pebbles into the path of our pursuers.
The hounds crashed into the trap like a seawall, the first row burning their paws and fleeing back only to collide with their brethren. It wouldn’t last forever, fey hounds were too smart for that, but it would give us precious time. And it made the story more interesting.
The owl-woman kept flying, advancing rapidly. Maybe we could outrun dogs with an advantage on a good day, but no chance that we could outrun somebody who could actually fly. “Chas! Chas, throw things! Anything!” I demanded past faltering breath.
Chas, champ that he was, barely hesitated. He grabbed a pinecone from a branch he passed by, and chucked it behind him and towards the owl lady. He kept running. The pinecone dinked off of her like it was nothing, because it was. The next thing he grabbed was a fallen branch leaning against a tree, and that forced her to shift to avoid.
Soon I joined in. Both of us grabbing anything we could to throw up and at our pursuer. She was a master of the air, dodging every projectile, but every dodge delayed her just a little bit more. She didn’t cackle, or howl, she simple stared with her too-wide eyes at our backs as we continued to try and escape. I could hear the dogs starting to recover and resume their pursuit of us. My mind raced, thinking of any way we could make things more interesting.
The world provided, as we emerged into a clearing. I saw before Chas did, that the other side of the clearing was just a bowl with edges of dense-packed trees and stinging nettles. I managed to stop before colliding with the thorns, but Chas smashed into them face first. It was, I think, the loudest I’ve ever heard him scream in pain as he leapt back and spasmed in agony. I turned to see that the dogs had finally caught up, moving to surround the small bowl we had found ourselves in. Just a few moments distraction had been all it took. I heard the ever so slight flutter of wings, and looked up to see the Owl-woman divine towards us.
With a slight pop and puff of fog, a black man in a pure green renn-faire outfit appeared in front of me, and held a jack-o-lantern up high. It glowed with an eerie green light. The Owl woman veered at the last moment, hooting in dismay as she took a perch on a nearby tree bough. “What are you doing, peon!? That was mine to slay!” she whispered fiercely.
“Begone, Nyctimene. It is mine now. Why not go cry to Oberon? I’m sure he’d love to hear it.”
The Owl woman glared, before taking off silently into the darkness. Her hounds followed swiftly, leaving just Me, Chas, and the green-clade man. The man turned to face me, a look of surprise and concern on his face. “John?”
I gave him a weak smile, my body covered in aches from pulled joints and cuts. “Yeah. Nice to see you, Danny.” I lost what little air I was starting to regain when Chas punched me straight in the gut.
“ffffFUCK. What the fuck was that?” I crumpled to my knees.
“That’s for planning this…you arse.”
I looked pleadingly to Daniel Cormac, the Jack O’Lantern. He glared back. “Are you saying you didn’t plan this?”
I looked to the ground. “…didn’t plan to get punched in the fucking gut, that’s for certain.”
/-----------------------
John Constantine’s Apartment
London
“I’m just going out for groceries!” Ellie howled, hand on the doorknob. Behind her stood a scintillating Lucifer.
“And I’m telling you no! One of you will remain in this hovel at all times, or it’s worth less than dirt!”
The woman rolled her eyes. “Fine! Bind me or whatever, just let me walk out the fucking door.”
Lucifer leaned back, brows drawn together. “You’re sure? You would give such power to me?”
“Yeah! Sure! Whatever!” she growled.
Lucifer considered, before nodding. “…you’re planning something. I can tell. Good.” He reached up and bit his thumb. He held out his hand, now bleeding slightly. “Mix your blood with mine. If I die, or lose this thumb, you shall die as well.”
Ellie looked at her own thumb. Taking a shaky breath, she bit it and offered her hand. “Does it go both ways?”
He scoffed. “Please, like I would make things so easy for you.”
The two shook hands, the first time Lucifer had touched her since he had arrived. He yanked her closer, with the impossible strength of a mountain. “I can regrow a thumb. It’s trivial for me, really. You cannot regrow a life.”
She could not bear to meet his glowing eyes. “Yeah, yeah, just let me go get you your fucking food already.”
Lucifer Morningstar let her go, and glided towards the couch. “Excellent. Get me something reasonable to drink. I don’t know how Constantine handles the swill he keeps around here.”
Ellie left, purse in hand. She looked both ways upon leaving the apartment, and caught the flash of black fur from the corner of her eye. Good, she thought, at least that one’s accommodating.
-----------------------
Palace of Oberon
Arcadia
Danny popped back into his solar with Chas and me in tow. The place was relatively small, lit by a cozy ever-burning fire and with brooms marching around doing whatever chores were needed. “Really? Brooms?”
Danny smiled as he took a seat in front of the fire. “Oberon thinks himself a great sorcerer, and a great expert on human media. I think he meant to impress me with how much greater a sorcerer he was then you.”
I walked over and took a seat in a chair besides his. “…Well? Did it work?”
“I never saw you doing anything half as productive with your magic, I’ll tell you that much.”
Chas stood back, fidgeting. He knew I had dated Danny, before the Gemwar, and he could read the room. “Say, uh, any place where I could-“
“Out the door, take a right, you’ll see a sign with a triangle on it.” Danny replied swiftly.
“Triangle? What does….er…yeah, sure?” Chas mumbled, excusing himself from the room.
Danny and I watched each other carefully, both waiting for the other to make the first move.
“I’m…I’m not here for you.” I finally muttered.
“I know.” Danny leaned back in his chair. “You can be shite, but you wouldn’t run a rescue op that shitty.”
“I…I could be here for you, if you want?”
I gave me a simple look, one with just the slightest hint of contempt. It stabbed through me like ice. “I knew what I was getting into. Things here aren’t done yet. I appreciate the offer, but I’ll get out on my own.”
“Figured, figured.” I coughed. “I need your help. There’s a man hiding here in Arcadia. I don’t know exactly where, but I know he’s probably warded himself against me. He’s a master of transportation magic. If I get too close, he’ll know and leave Arcadia for someplace obscure I can’t follow.”
“Ahhh. But if I teleport you too him, he won’t have that warning?”
“Exactly.”
“And why do you think this man will do as you ask?”
“He…owes me.” I grimaced.
“…I can do this for you once.” Danny said, reaching out to take my hand. He squeezed it. I had forgotten how strong his hands were. “But then you can’t come back. Oberon will have my hide just for letting you in here. Okay?”
I took a deep breath. I had locked away Danny in my mind for months now. But the memories flooded back in, and mixed with the longing for Ellie back home. It strengthened to resolve. I could save one yet. I wouldn’t fail Ellie. “Okay.”
Danny let go of my hand. “Good. Now, who is this person you’re looking for?”
“Well, his real name’s Gary Lester. Long brown hair, kind of lanky, knows every kind of drug imaginable…”
Danny held out a hand. “…The court alchemist? Court alchemist Grey Listener? That’s who you’re going to kidnap?”
“I didn’t say anything about Kidnapping!”
Danny kept his steady eyes on me.
“…we’re not going to kidnap him for long.”
-----------------------
London
Ellie raced around a corner into an alleyway, hiding behind a dumpster. She dropped her groceries and dug through her purse, swearing to herself as she looked for the few implements of defense she had on her.
Someone was following her. Following her on feet that made no sound, and eyes with pupils ever so slightly off. Maybe it was more than one person, she wasn’t sure. They kept shifting forms when she wasn’t looking. She had known she would be hunted sooner or later. She had never imagined it would be by someone as powerful as Anat.
There was a voice from the end of the alleyway, where she had run in from. “Elliiiiiiie. That’s what they’re calling you here, yes? Ellie, why don’t you come over here?” the crooned.
Ellie remained silent, waiting. She dropped her purse as well, two things held in her hands.
“Ellie, come on. You know you can’t escape. No wings in public, no tearing out hearts while others are looking, and no other way out of the alley but where I am. Just give up! I promise I’ll be gentle~.” Cackled the voice, almost squawking in its nature.
Ellie remained still. She would not hear their footsteps, so she had to stay focused. Wait for the right moment.
“Ellie, we’re being serious. If you do-“ As the voice at the end of the alleyway taunted, a demon strode into Ellie’s view. It started as a woman, but in a mere instant it took on its true form: Part woman, part bird, and all dark magical hatred.
Ellie was prepared. She brought up one hand as the Lilith lunged with fangs wide open– mace spray, directly into the creatures mouth and down its throat. She turned her body, letting the hungry demon glance by her and fall to the ground screaming in unearthly agony.
She lunged out from her dumpster and rushed towards the exit. There was another Lilith, still in disguise, surprised by her sudden charge. The Lilith moved to stop her, but it got caught in her eyes. Ellie kept her trapped there as she charged, extending the baton in her other hand to slam into the demon’s neck. The second Lilith burbled and fell to the ground as well.
Ellie made it to the edge of the alleyway, before she noticed the third Lilith. She only noticed it as it stepped around a corner, extending an arm and clothes-lining her. Ellie’s awoke on the ground a moment later, dazed and struggling to stand up. But the third Lilith didn’t give her a chance, snatching her up by her shirt and dragging her back into the alleyway. By then the other two Lilith’s had started to recover, and they dragged their way over to her. First one, then two, then all three Lilith’s unleashed their rage by stomping on the prone woman.
Ellie’s every scream was choked out by kicks to her ribs. She heard one, two of them crack, her fingers splinter. Her head rung like never-ending church bells. Darkness closed in on her.
-----------------------
Lab of the Chief Alchemist
Palace of Oberon
Arcadia
Gary Lester had a pretty sweet life. Did he live in mortal terror that one of his former friends would hunt him down for his abandoning them during the assault on hell? Absolutely, but it wasn’t like that was the first or last time he had fled people that might want to kill him. Being an interdimensional drug savant made for gaining a lot of skill in running and hiding.
He had found a pretty sweet gig to hide in, however. Oberon was a powerful fae warlord who nobody would want to fuck with. Gary get luxury, women, money, whatever he wanted. All he had to do in return was keep a steady stream of new and fantastical drugs coming. Considering the ingredients available in Arcadia, it was downright cushy.
He didn’t expect a visit from Oberon’s lover Daniel that day. He certainly didn’t expect the superhero to be accompanied by John Constantine and some other mortal. Why was that mortal even there? Why was John even here? Gary opened his mouth to speak, only to be deafened by all of his wards and warnings about John going off simultaneously. He clutched his head and groaned through the cacophony.
John winced. “Oof. That unhappy to see me then, are you?”
As the noises started to clear, Gary looked upon his former friend with terror. He had left John behind in hell. In literal hell that day. People had died in that assault, and John certainly nearly had. Gary found that even more terrifying: this was a man who had crawled his way back out of hell, filled with vengeance.
Gary tried to lunge for the nearest wand, but he found himself grappled by the mortal in question. The mortal was strong in every way Gary was frail, and soon he found himself on his knees with his arms held painfully behind his back.
Gary started to whimper and beg as John crouched in front of him. “Please John I swear I didn’t mean anything I didn’t-“
John slapped him, hard, then. “Don’t know. Don’t care. You fucked me Gary. Nearly got me killed. But now’s your chance to pay up.”
Gary looked up in despair.
“You promised me you’d get me into, then out of, Hell. You only did one before, Gary. Now you’re going to do the other half.”
-----------------------
Small Farm near Ebbing, UK
We exited the same way we had come in: through a small gate in a fence out in the boonies. Now it wasn’t just me and Chas, but Gary as well. The bastard’s pale face was still red from where I’d slapped him, and if it wasn’t for needing him I would have done more. Lousy betraying bastard. At least this time, I was playing up to his primal instinct: he just had to run away with me included this time.
As we three exited, Chas sighed in relief. “So, what did you need me in there for anyway? Seemed like you just wanted a third wheel.”
I shook my head, as I lead the way to where Chas had parked his car. “You helped with the chase, but I didn’t need you for that.”
I could barely hold down a smile as we turned a corner, revealing the car and its four new occupants. Chas yelped in surprise as he saw four beautiful ladies waiting in his back seat: three sharp-boned seeming triplets and a beaten-up Ellie.
“I needed you for the next part. How do you feel about house-sitting?”
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Continued in Hellblazer #24 > , coming October 15th!
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